Wednesday 23 June 2010

Germany here we.. erm, dawdle

I keep thinking of Harvey Keitel in Pulp Fiction: 'Okay boys lets not start sucking each others dicks just yet.'

Yes, we were much better.

Defoe for Heskey was like butter for lard. A centre forward who scores. Novel.


Here's Jermain looking at a dodgy front two and hoping he can get in there and score.

Milner for Lennon was like Phil The Power Taylor for Cupid. Positively Beckhamesque delivery.

Upson for Carragher was like racehorse for donkey. The last ditch tackle was immaculate and I can't see the worthy doddering Scouse getting another bash at it.

Other than that they remembered some of the basics. Keep the ball, pass to each other and perhaps now they'll remember the other principle of the modern footballer, keep your press conferences bland.

Capello was hearty and tactile afterwards, and it looked a bit uncomfortable, like a boisterous uncle after a couple of pints.

And me? I made a stupid vow before the game. No booze and no fags until England lose. Bugger me if it didn't work. And now I've been ordered to keep it up.

So in order to support a great run for our boys I am prepared to put my wellbeing on the line. Not a B&H or a bass will pass me lips till we lose. And when I say no booze that includes wine, cider and even beer that you swig out of a bottle with a slice of lime in it like it were a campari or summat.

I'm not being a pessimist. I just don't reckon that next pint is far away.

Rooney isn't fit. You can see it. He was better than against Algeria but then a lump of igneous rock would have been an improvement. He lacks that instant movement and quickness of foot and mind (in a purely footballing sense) that a fully firing Wazza would have in spades.

Joe Cole's appearance was welcome but he's still got that kiddy mentality where he comes on and tries to do way too much too soon. He's like one of them numpties who joins a motorway and is weaving between cars before he's got off the slip road.

Barry gave Slovenia every chance to counter attack and mishit so many more passes than his midfield mates that I thought there was a divot stuck to his boot throughout the second half.

And we should've tonked six past them.

At least we won't have to listen to our boys whispering how difficult it is to be cooped up in one place with nothing to do when they're not training. There's a world outside Grand Theft Auto and beer and shagging the missus.

There are things called books. Terribly clever people have spent a long time writing them and they're like stories. Like The Hungry Caterpillar but even longer.

There are things like pens and paper. You could do pictures with them. Post them to the children. They might even send something back that looks like what it's supposed to look like.

You can create shapes with the paper if you can't remember which end of the pen to point at the paper. It's called origami. No Ashley you're getting confused - the Dutch fans are nicknamed the 'Orange Army'.

Which reminds me. Other people talk different to us. You can learn how to do it and it might help you get a job where they live.

Plus you know the crap you bung on your headphones. That doesn't just happen you know. People who make those noises learn how to play things called musical instruments. It's tricky at first but once you get the hang of it, you'll never get be boring again. Unless your name is Chris Martin. Or Dido.

There's also internet porn. But they know that. How can they be bored?

So there's a job lot of beer sitting under canvass in the back garden, just waiting for the sprightly Germans to send our back four scattering. They've got Terry Hall as skipper and a real star in Ozil. Plus they move it about the park in well nifty fashion like a slightly wooden Argentina.

It'd be nice to stick one up sneery Franz Beckenbauer's schnozz but I can't see one of them brews being called Schadenfraude come Sunday night.

I'm not being unpatriotic, and I'm not whingeing about a beer embargo (unlike our boys in Rustenberg) I'm just basing it on what we've seen so far.

'I can't vait for ze latest hilarious piss-take of vat is one of ze greatest pervormances IN ZINEMA HISTORY!!!'

Of course no one wants an English victory more than the Youtube subtitling fraternity of Downfall. It's going ot be endless, I tell you.

865 comments:

  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  2. christ it was hard not to say "first" then. some charming potential serial killer advised me to jump in front of a train last time i did that

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  3. i dont think rooney is unfit, robbo, i think he's getting mind-bending phonecalls from his svengali in manchester. like in the ipcress files "now listen to me. you will not run until the english season starts"

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  4. shouldnt you have grown a beard instead? is this a midlife beergut/guilt crisis? are you honestly saying if we go a triumphant progress over the battered corpses of germany, argentina, brazil and spain you wont celebrate with a single drop? even the chuffing team are driking beer. madness.

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  5. Robbo, your reverse psychology/ attempts at unjinxing wont work.

    Its too late for that.

    England are well on their way to kick some untypical german ass.

    Schweintsteiger and Özil are both unfit now. And the german defence is even more vulnerable once you flank them from the right since, forever.


    You are making an ultimate sacrifice by giving up booze and fags. Hope you are ready to wait, coz it will be a while.

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  6. There's also internet porn. But they know that. How can they be bored?

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    thats it! that explains the performance vs algeria! in the absence of any other form of stimulus theyve been wanking themselves to death

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  7. come on, england will destroy germany, they werent that great vs ghana. we just need to get michael caine to intercept the ipcress phonecalls to rooney and history itself will be on the march.

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  8. now listen to me, someone else will post a comment....now listen to me.....

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  9. Spit, Robbo

    I think we can do it on Sunday. Unfortunately its when I flying back to HH but my friends intend to wait for me for me win or lose

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  10. Blimey Blog, Boring 3 in a row to start us off?

    I think there's a lot more kind words to be said than yours robbo, for the first time this summer it looked like all of the players believed they could do something with the ball. Like they actually wanted to get the ball forward.

    Slowmo of the day must be John Terry diving head first across to try and block a shot after already making one great stop. I'm not sure which bit was better; him in mid air, albeit 6 inches of the floor, or the slow thud of his body hitting the floor afterwards.

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  11. Come on, that's more fun than talking about England!!

    But congratulations anyway, you're slightly less shite than Algeria and Slovenia.

    The US of A aren't as shit as you though!!

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  12. my eyes must be as bad as the ref's Bo, looked like his chest to me!
    =============================

    If you get a chance to watch the replay Trott you'll see the ball hit the arm and the chest, exactly the same as kewell.

    Gaz, the US are shit... we were nearly as bad as they were on the night that was all.

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  13. I'm off to bed... can hardly type here... type to y'all later.

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  14. Once again it's the first of two battles, if we get past Scweinstiger and his mates we get to face the Argies (most likely). If that doesn't make our boys develop some passion I don't know what will!

    Robbo, I hope you remain tee total until the 12th of July, or does your no booze and fags rulle apply to the euro qualifiers as well. Me , I'll be taking out shares in Nicorette!

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  15. Well what a night! I've just dragged my sorry arse into work and now have to fend off sleep for the nect 9 hours.
    2 games, 2 results - not bad. It's a pity the results in the other games didn't go the way I would've wanted. Ah well, the sheilaroos go out but the mighty England continue onwards and.. well onwards.
    Much better performance. For an hour they actually looked as though they wanted to play then Rooney started walking and the the overall performance became pedestrian.
    BRING THE GERMANS!!!

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  16. Good blog Robbo. Enjoyed that.

    Well i had to watch the game with my colleagues at work. I feared the worst beforehand as only a small percentage watch football regularly and with previous world cups people have come out with stupid comments throughout or are so damn negative.

    To set the scene they chose the boardroom as the venue, despite it being about a tenth of the size of the empty office adjacent which has air con. So they dragged in a portable air con unit which made more noise than those fucking horns.

    So we are in the room and someone thought that the drivers amongst us (pretty much all of us) couldnt stick to 1 beer and thought we would all end up drink driving, so they banned alcohol.

    All in all it was pretty good actually. There was a good bit of banter flying about and only one idiot who kept shouting out "get him off" at pretty much any player who made the slightest error. His first "victim" was James Milner and his last was Wayne Rooney, in fact he was actually delighted he was subbed. I think it made his afternoon.

    It probably sounds like im a whinging bastard, but im grateful for the chance to be able to watch it but i prefer watching games in small groups as i normally miss too much of the action.

    Oh and one english bloke (a rugby fan), despite being very patriotic when it comes to rugby and cricket, didnt want to watch it or even want us to win. Cunt!

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  17. i was just going to say that i have given up trying not to swear on hear cause Robbo's blog was littered with swear words, but it wasnt. I must be on drugs or something.

    Sorry for the use of the word "cunt".

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  18. England were much better Zeb. In a weird way i think the shitty pitch helped us. They, like most eastern european teams are technically better at passing, movement and controlling the ball, but the pitch stopped a lot of that.

    We should have won more comfortably, but it was a good goal from a move they had been working on in austria for ages...only it was Adam Johnson whipping in excellent crosses and rooney finishing them.

    I think rooney will get better once he scores. I just hope its against the germans.

    They look pretty enough playing the ball around, but im not sure they have that much of a cutting edge. Think it will be pretty even, but hope we can sneak it.

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  19. I do hope that when the England team go through the performance and analyse stuff, they get SWP and Lennon to watch the james milner crosses over and over again and say "COPY"

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  20. How can you be English only when it suits you? You either are or you are not. I'm sure there are a lot of @unts out there who'd like to be able to switch between being one and not but, unfortunately, they're stuck with what they are.
    Agreed STGP. The only thing that worried me was the way we turned to mush for the last 20 minutes after an hour of dominance didn't bring the second goal. All too nervy for me towards the end.

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  21. Funny isn't but I can see why the pundits say England is so reliant on Rooooney. When he's playeds like shite, England have played like shite. His performance picks up a little and so does England's. If FC can get him firing on all 4 cylinders July 12 here we come.

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  22. SGP said...

    "Oh and one english bloke (a rugby fan), despite being very patriotic when it comes to rugby and cricket, didnt want to watch it or even want us to win. Cunt!"

    _______________________________


    SGP, firstly it is perfectly acceptable to call a rugby fan a cunt and you don't need to apologise for it.

    Secondly I am like this when Ireland are playing rugby. I fucking detest the wankers.

    When Ireland were playing Wales a couple of years ago and had to win for the grand slam I was cheering for Wales.

    Some people didn't like it. But they were rugby fans. The cunts.

    I fucking detest rugby.

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  23. For Bo (when he wakes up - saying that I should be in bed myself). THe Aussies put in a sterling performance and at 2-0, I thought there going to get another here and your (unlikely) prediction come true. But then Schwarzer fu@ked up and it all when tits up and, as usual, you can't trust the Germans to do you any favours. BRING THEM ON!

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  24. See I'm too tired - *went tits up.

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  25. So Germany eh? And is it Argentina in the quarters then?

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  26. Although I understand more about the temperature cycles in washing machines, I love Rugby.

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  27. Gaz, I can see that you do not like rugby or the people who play it, as I detest those who think tiddlywinks is a contest, but how can you support another country's team? Surely indifference would be a better option? FFS I scream at the TV when the England lawn bowls team are giving it to the Aussies, fuck I'd even support the tiddlywinks team if it means England come out on top.

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  28. Perhaps I should say this...

    Rugby as a game is sort of ok. (That's as much praise as I can give it)


    Rugby fans are proof that evolution never took place. The cunts.

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  29. Zebedee there are several reasons.

    Firstly I think the whole nationalism carry on is just a load of bullshit. What makes me so different from someone born in a different country I don't know.

    Secondly, and most importantly....

    Rugby fans are just complete and utter cunts.

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  30. Gaz were you conceived in a scrum or something?

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  31. England won eh - Trott we may never meet - and u may not b JFK - but thanks for keeping our spirits up this week - up the effing trotters!!!!!

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  32. Robbo - I like yr pdcast - of oI do find it twee

    More pod casts - it hekps me sleep!!!!!


    Seriously - more podcasts!!!!!!!!!

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  33. Has anyone else just got in from celebrating the win?????

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  34. Gaz, if you're talking racism and xenophobia being a by-product of nationalism then I can see where your coming from but nationalism as an expanded form of parochialism is, or should be harmless. I support STFC because I grew up there (there would be no other reason to surely). I support England for the same reason. Not because I think Johnny Foreigner and his brethren are anything other than that, foreign.
    As for the middle-class twats with the lovely coloured school ties they use to get by in the world, I agree you could find better sections of the community to represent your team but WTF, it's your team.
    Fuck this is too heavy.
    C'MON ENGLAND!!!!!

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  35. fbh - Been up all night watching football. Couldn't think of a better way of abusing my body.

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  36. You think thats heavy? I'm actually in a coma and everything in this world is my dream. You better hope I never wake up.

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  37. Well actually I could but nothing I'm going to disclose in this forum.

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  38. Sounds a bit Matrix-esque.

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  39. Just watched Jean-Claude Van Damme in JCVD. Brilliant movie if a bit shitty in bits.

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  40. I blame 9/11 on the fact that I hate some cheese before I fell into the coma.

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  41. I just don't really get it Zebedee. I was born in Ireland so that means I have to support Ireland? Pah! Not for me. Especially when the Irish rugby team and fans are people I wouldn't piss on if they were on fire. I would piss on them if they weren't though.

    I can be a United fan because I chose to be. Some may say that wasn't a great choice but they're just jealous! :)

    Nationalism / parochialism or whatever, call it what you will, just isn't for me. To be told I have to do something or be like something just because I happened to be born in a certain hospital in a certain town? Fuck that, never got it, probably never will.

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  42. Rod - there are many many many many many people who would wish you were in a coma and never woke up!!!!!
















    Mwahahahaha!!

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  43. Gaz tsk, tsk! Very poor grammar young man.

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  44. Youse all love me. Where would this blog be without my ingenious insight into the inner-workings of everything. My opinion is more fact than fact itself. Infact I'd say I could take on Chuck Norris.

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  45. And maybe come close to winning

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  46. Gaz, you miss my point. I choose to support STFC and England because I was born/grew up there. I do not have to support them and people should not be vilified for such a choice just because they use this tenuous connection to do so. However, using it to channel other agendas is a different matter.

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  47. I will read the blog- but in jisy it looks good - iff a bit rushed - fffs do I sound like JDR - remember him - I am just si pleased we ddnt go out in the group stages!!!!!


    Reading - Eh - these cudnt pcik their nose - bring on Das Germans!!!

    Das Boot

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  48. I miss JDR. He won't return my calls.

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  49. Gaz/Rod - |I hopd u r happy 4 yr English freinds 0 we r not french u know

    cheese is shit

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  50. No I get you Zebedee, as long as I can choose not to support Ireland at certain things.

    And rugby fans are still cunts.

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  51. I'm happy for my English friends FBH.


    It's the other English cunts that are the problem.

    Rugby fans probably!

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  52. Eveni Ze b sorry but im muklered das 3pm k off is bad and good at same time 0 england win and met a girl called sarh or sahara or sumat :)

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  53. Rugby Gaz - aint that a scool where cameron and his old scool tie mates went

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  54. Sorry lads I must go - catch up 2moy - minging boze and fags (apols bo Im on them 2day)- speak soon - ROBBO - get urself to Yarm on Sunday (If im alive)- let me know where - u owe me an effing pint!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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  55. England r a soft southern club who play their home games in ( that ) London

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  56. FBH, how many have you had? Be honest haha!

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  57. I've never hated England or wished them failure. Its just the way some English fans go on that does me head in.

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  58. Here's my best JDR impression:

    JoeDavisRoach said...

    Not sure where to start. What a pile of crap. It's disppointing to see that you have not used the artistic licence afforded to you now that you have left the BBC. I liked the first line but after that it went downhill and the use of gratuitous sexual references is unbecoming Robbo - or should that be Niall as you've now come out from under the wing of the BBC surely it's time to ditch the silly pseudonym. I'm a little disappointed that you continually insist on concentrating your subject matter on the world cup. Your patronising assessment of the England team is hardly worthy of the tag 'journalism' and if you wish to get back into the mainstream your going to have to much better than this effort. Believe it or not, there are other sports going on at the moment that are worthy of mention and as you purport this to be a sports blog I think you should widen your scope accordingly. To name a few:
    England's premier tennis tournament is in full swing and packed with more excitement than you are likely to find in South Africa at the moment.
    One of golf's majors has just been settled and the F1 is mid-season and I haven't even mentioned the tiddlywinks.
    Obviously, you still do not have time to complete a decent blog (even though you no longer have a real deadline to meet) and this goes to vindicate my continual sniping that eventually had you removed from the BBC.
    On a positive note, you appear to be be making less references to that turgid fictional watering hole and the mates who frequent it with you. Once again Robbo (Niall), a criminally poor effort. E.

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  59. Oh JDR I've missed you so. The sound you make is musac to my ears.

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  60. Good stuff Robbo, drastic measure taking the pledge(s) though, we could be at the beginning of the longest unbeaten streak in International Footballing History! I'd set a maximum time limit of 4 more games if I were you!

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  61. Other alternatives if footballers get bored - Get onto Robbo's blog.

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  62. Gaz,

    I am totally with you re supporting your country.

    Just because I am born in some place or to someone who was, does not make me better than anyone who wasnt.

    For me, its not that the country (and the club) that I support is better than other because they got some divine right or history but because I want them to do better. Those who are near and dear to me i.e. family, friends doing well, brings me joy. On a wider scale, my city/country-men excelling in areas, such as but not limited to, sports makes me happy too.

    The family and friends are also perfectly capable of mucking it up big time and that shall make one sad and being humans, we are all capable of actions worthy of shame. Any such action shall not be glossed over. Thats the 'check' I have for withdrawing my support.

    My support for England, Arsenal, my family is not unconditional.

    So I want England to beat Germany come Sunday. And I am sure they will because they are better technically and tactically.
    Plus it will be a big larf.

    Failing that, I would be perfectly glad if Germany go on to win the thing because I also have some great friends here.


    Letting the Italians, Spanis or Brazil win is a greater shame than supporting RUGBY.

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  63. Just because I am born in some place or to someone who was, does not make me better than anyone who wasnt.

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    i support this comment but only to make the misfortunate bastards who werent born in england feel better about themselves

    actually i disagree with nearly everything you say there, spit. my support for my family is unconditional and i absolutely love it when my friends fuck up, makes me laugh.

    i recognise that your take on things is more rational though.

    as for the tory-voting cunts who wear blazers and shit in each others pints after chasing an egg around a pitch, dont get me started. pity theyre all so chuffing big, or id tell them myself.

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  64. Blog,

    I know its funny when a friend slips on his way back from the bar only for his pants to drink the whole pint but whould I wish them ill? No.

    Would I unconditionally support a family member who is involved in some heinous act? No.

    I would support them if the support meant helping them correct their mistake, but to keep on loving them while they become a scourge to the society, I cannot.

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  65. do you think upson will keep his place? i think he deserves to but i suspect cap will go with carraghers experience of the big time v germany

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  66. spit i agree with you it depends on what you mean by support - i support port vale and england because i was born into it. i could support another club side, like i can make new friends, no problem.

    but supporting anyone except your own country is perverse. if you choose to support another country you are rejecting an element of your social identity which is a constuct of other people's thought about you. the french supporters will sneer at you as you sing the marseilleise with a scottish accent. you just wont quite belong.

    its the same thing as changing sex. i have great sympathy for someone who thinks "i was born a man but i feel like a woman inside" and goes through the very toruous process of gender-change. but its incomprehensible to me. i dont understand. sorry. its like being born in scunthorp and supporting burkina faso ie do it if you like but you'll always seem a bit odd as you totter around in high heels with your adams apple and burkina faso scarf

    i lived in holland for a while and want them to do well, but im not norman tebbitt about this - for me its not a transferable badge of allegiance - you should support the country of your birth otherwise you are a traitorous and should be burned at the stake and buried in a paupers grave unmarked saved for the words, in indistinct gey lettering : "homogenised globalisation"

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  67. got tired of trying to be rational towards the end of that post. no offence meant to the trans-sexuals amongst you.

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  68. Dont Transsexuals, by definition, transcend the notion of sexual identification?

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  69. so trans-nationals shouldnt support any team at all?

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  70. but on sunday i'll still be sitting here in my michael caine-style pith helmet with 3 lions on it, 1966 replica kis (c/w boots) and a st georges cross on my face.

    and if we lose i'll be re-enacting the Charge of the Light Brigade on a donkey on margate sands, connecting nothing with nothing

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  71. Blog 100% correct. I choose to support who I do but I cannot for the life of me think why the fuck you'd do anything different. Just because some cunts get all xenophobic or racist abouut it all is not a reason not to believe in ENGLAND!

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  72. Morning, just been reading through the running commentary on the previous blog during the game. Quality lads, quality!

    So Sunday game eh? Damn it thats fucked my golfing weekend right up!!

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  73. Is everyone suffering a hangover or summit?

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  74. Bunch of light weights the lotta yer!

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  75. So I have the blog to myself then. Its after 9 and still noone (plymouth) is here.

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  76. Will everyone be watching the tennis?
    59-59 in the fifth. Then there is everyone's favourite Scott - Murray.

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  77. This World Cup has turned out like World War II. The French surrendered early, the Yanks arrived at the last minute and we are left to fight the fucking Germans.

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  78. morning yous lot...

    i reckon that england can do it... i thought germany were pretty tame against a ghana team that flatters to decieve, breif moments of flair aside, they are shite. germany lack that killing edge that has existed in previous incarnations. Granted we were pretty shit ourselves but as an englishman i refuse to let logic and reasoned arguments cloud my blissful bias...

    ....

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  79. Ah, at last, civilisation.

    Morning RBA. How's the head? How's the new born? How's life?

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  80. WORLD CUP:Franz Beckenbauer says England have been 'stupid' to fall to a last-16 clash with Germany .
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    What a cock!!!!!

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  81. Ay up Ngog... the heads fine (didn't drink) and the new born is doing great, at 10 days old he may be too young to teach to say "F**k you Fritz" but its not stopping me from trying...

    Life is goood... the sun is shining, england are winning...

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  82. that beckenbauer, anyone else think hes spent a couple of days posting on here to fine tune his wumming skills?

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  83. "Manchester United defender Gary Neville's dream of building an eco-friendly £6m underground home is set to be decided by the Government. Communities Secretary Eric Pickles is expected to make a final decision on whether the flower-shaped 8,000 sq ft futuristic home can be built."

    Come again????

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  84. Good to hear RBA.

    Franz is just a right idiot.

    GNev - What The Fuck???

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  85. obviously he takes this environmentally friendly stuff a bit too seriously. Franz has a point though if we had scored more goals we'd be to and playing Ghana, Uruguay and New Zealand on our way to the final rather than Germany, Argentina and Brazil.

    Rather a bit foolish really not beating Algeria

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  86. FOOTBALL:Peter Reid is appointed as the new Plymouth manager to replace Paul Mariner.
    ====================
    MMMMMMMMMMMMMonkey Boy down at Plymouth.

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  87. Firstly I think the whole nationalism carry on is just a load of bullshit. What makes me so different from someone born in a different country I don't know.
    =================================

    I hate this... truly hate this... again I have to agree with you Gaz... flag waving wankers are bane to the world... but it is not entirely (almost but not entirely) their fault... many of them have been brainwashed into feeling that their country is superior to others.

    G'day all... A great win last night... at least they played (for 60 minutes then they tired pretty badly) like a team with a purpose (yes it is England I'm talking about)Trott, you were pretty accurate in your prediction... could have been 18-1 as you suggested... but eventually just won by the single goal.

    Zeb... the aussies came close mate... as I said you just can't underestimate the buggers.

    I tipped ya the wink last night about the prospect of Oz having it's first female Prime Minister... it came to fruition today... Julia Gillard has taken over the reins of the country... which is a good thing, I can now say "that bloody woman."

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  88. Bo i just heard from an ozzie customer of mine you had some shelia in charge now... but he was pretty resolute it will be short term as your labour lot will be ousted in the upcoming election... i think that shows great improvement in australia, you used to be abouot 15 years behind us, now its just a few months.... i thank the internet!

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  89. I can't believe its so quiet in here.

    I also can't believe its not butter! These sandwiches are tasty!

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  90. yeah its mad quiet... i honestly though my pc had frooze or summat... wots gwarning? Everyone off work with hangovers...

    wheres jack?

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  91. Ah, so this is where you've buggered off to ... This heat's getting to me ... I didn't even think to check if there was another blog up.

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  92. I think Germanys gonna be a tougher game than Argentina. Although knowing Capello, instead of attacking a weak defence he'll set up his team to defend staunchly and hope England nick a goal from the 3 half chances they create.

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  93. So how's life in the WC Fantasy league for you lot?

    It seems I've really gone and done a France with this lot ... in theory the team's good, plenty of talent in all areas but it's just not working out.

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  94. I'm in 10th at the moment Star.

    But I dropped a right bollock yesterday when I made a transfer and put Klose in. Only to then realise when I sat down to watch the England game that Klose was suspended. What a complete waste of a transfer. Fucking right idiot I am!!

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  95. I was propping up the table till a couple of days ago Ngog ... amazing really given my team has Xavi, Rooney, Drogba, Torres, Kaka (oh wait he's suspended) Lampard, Veron, Evra, Casillas and Zambrotta among others.

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  96. I read the Franz Beckenbauer article. I reckon what he meant was that it was 'Stupid' for England and Germany to be playing each other so early on in the tournament. That they should be playing each other in the latter stages. Which I think is actually a compliment. The media at it again taking taking things out of context to fill the nationalist/patriotic fervour.

    I desperately want England to win, but if we don't then good luck to our European neighbours.

    Peace Bruvva

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  97. Its a good team on paper Star, but non of them, bar Kaka has actually done anything! Which is a real surprise.

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  98. I had Villa as captain which moved me up about 15 places when he scored two.

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  99. I've switched to a 4-3-3 again to get around Kaka not playing and got Higuan in the team for now.

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  100. Well said MR... and with the refeshing breeze of passifism and dyslexia dancing in the air may i draw your attentions to the latest Aldershot flavoured Woe which is all about war!

    http://aldershotwoes.blogspot.com/2010/06/war.html

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  101. sounds like some of you guys are having a bit of an identity crisis. why are you not different than other nationalities? why are you not better than other nationalities? come on! get a grip!

    so ignoring your refined liberal sensibilities for a mo i'd just like to say:

    COME ON ENGLAND. HOW MANY TIMES DO WE HAVE TO BEAT THE GERMANS BEFORE THEY REALISE THAT THEY ARE NOT THE MASTER RACE. WE ARE !

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  102. Why Did You Ngog Rafa said...
    This World Cup has turned out like World War II. The French surrendered early, the Yanks arrived at the last minute and we are left to fight the fucking Germans.

    ---------------------

    thats a quality post that is, ngog.

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  103. and another thing - Germany-Argentina how much more exciting a prospect is that than Ghana-Uruguay (yawn).

    can we beat Brazil? no. are we going to win the WC? no. so lets have a couple of edgy grudge matches before we go out.

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  104. RBA... you kno0w how things go... one party follows the next... the labour party's popularity is down at the moment, has a bit to do with them putting a super tax on the mining companies (greedy bastards)... the mc's have spent a lot of money on big ad campaigns chasing Rudd around the country... at the moment labour wouldn't win an election if it was held today... who knows what will happen between now and next year... voters can be as fickle as football fans.

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  105. I reckon we can beat the germans but not the argies... they have looked good up to now.

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  106. Anyone get the Daily Mirror today? I'd advise reading the Brian Reade column page 21.

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  107. Beckenbauer actually said "dummerweise" after a bit of research, which translates as 'unfortunately' and not 'stupid' as reported by the media........................I do recognise I am arguing with myself because no one disputed my earlier comment............but I have too much time on my hands............I got made redundant for god's sake...........I suppose I could have left out that apostrophe in Gods............................christ I need a job

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  108. dummerweiser, rooney hasnt scored, so ive just read, since mario gomez trod on his ankle in march

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  109. m.r. - jobs are over-rated mate. and when you get one youre stuck with it until youre 70

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  110. i got a job its alright...

    wayne rooney is a load of cack, i been saying since day one heskey and crouch upfront, get the defenders laughing then let the lads in midfield poke them in... (goals that is).

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  111. what has small balls and screws old ladies


    bingo machine

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  112. I thought the punchline was going to be 'Rooney' there Blog

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  113. heskey sitting on crouch's shoulders wearing a massively over-size england shirt. that would be funny, especially with the stringy white pipe cleaner legs and the mourneful black face of emile on top. i'd laugh.

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  114. heskey sitting on crouch's shoulders wearing a massively over-size england shirt. that would be funny, especially with the stringy white pipe cleaner legs and the mourneful black face of emile on top. i'd laugh.
    Hahaha!!! Thats funny bloggy!

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  115. i like the idea of defoe standing on lennons shoulders who is stood on swps shoulders wearing a real size crouch shirt...

    decent!

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  116. Have you ever noticed how it's only "perfect" people that are murdered or killed these days? "He/she was the perfect son/daughter" or "They were such a perfect couple" or "The perfect family killed in tragic accident"!

    Doesn't it make you glad you're a cunt?

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  117. Oh well Bring on the Germans - Sunday afternoon - think I will stop in til then!!!

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  118. tell you what germania aint all that as a country neither, i heard it smells like rotting meat and clocks and the birds have teeth and the only music they have is nu-yodelling a grunge infused heavy metal mashup of yodelling with distorted guitars and screaming... and our top gear beat thier top gear in that race!

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  119. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  120. Extract from Response: The information you have requested is excluded from the Act because it is held for the purposes of ‘journalism, art or literature.’ The BBC is therefore not obliged to provide this information to you and will not be doing so on this occasion.

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  121. Request:

    In relation to the Robbo Robson blog can you please answer the following questions, for which I have failed to receive answers or find the information elsewhere:
    Why has the Robbo Robson blog ended?
    How many of the BBC's sports blogs were part for the Creative Review that resulted in the decision to end the Robbo Robson blog?
    What criteria was used in undertaking the Creative Review?
    Who undertook the Creative Review?
    What consultation took place with those with a history of posting on the Robbo Robson blog?
    In applying the criteria, what grading or scoring process was used in arriving at the decision? How did the Robbo Robson blog 'rank' in comparison to other blogs (discontinued and continued)?
    What internal meetings took place in which the subject of the future of the BBC's Sports Blogs was discussed? How may I access the minutes of these meetings?”

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  122. what a bunch of pussies!

    and staceys new born baby in last nights eastenders was about 6 months old, it certainly wasn't a new born... just more rubbish from the bbc...

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  123. I just managed to read it before you deleted it FBH. Then you go and write a smaller piece underneath! Make up your mind you hungover get ;-)

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  124. my mate says the bbc are bunch of shit biscuits, until now i'd always considered his damnation ill thought but in light of this latest piece of information i am inclined to agree with my mate.

    The BBC, what a bunch of shit biscuits!


    http://aldershotwoes.blogspot.com/2010/06/war.html

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  125. mornin' lads,

    a collection of genius drivel here today, chuckling corn flakes out me left nostril.

    We have a narrow victory over Germany ahead of us and a slightly more comfortable one against the Argies on the distant horizon.

    As the Germany match draws to a close there'll be a vuvuzela silencing chorus of "Kick 'n' rush, kick 'n' rush, kick 'n' rush" from 40,000 flag draped crusaders. Ohhh happy days.

    Until Sunday we can watch the 5th set of this record setting tennis match, as long as it doesn't rain of course.

    GO ENGLAND

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  126. Ngog - I decided to go for the punchier extract of my request - and yeah still hungover mate :)

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  127. how do trotters, all good state side? how did the 6 or 7 people in the states who like football feel about beating the invinsible england in the group stages???

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  128. "if germany beat england i'll eat my hat"

    I have heard this a thosand times today alone, anyone wanna join my edible hat franchise? we do a beef flavoured and a sausage flavoured and sell to both sides... we could make a killing?




    Any one know how to make edible hats?


    http://aldershotwoes.blogspot.com/2010/06/war.html

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  129. i'm hear today looking for £25000 for a 1% share of my company YummyHats. We make sport themed edible hats so people can be more honest and sincere when they say "i'll eat my hat" depending on a sporting result. they also make a great momento of the match...

    any questions?

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  130. ECHO ECHo ECho Echo echo.... .. .. . .

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  131. England win world cup... find out how...

    http://aldershotwoes.blogspot.com/2010/06/war.html

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  132. is everyone still watching that tennis game or summat...

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  133. RBA
    mmmmmmmm...edible hats. I stumbled on this web site accidentally once. God knows what I was looking for. Never thought it would be usefull until now. Check it

    http://www.hatsofmeat.com/

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  134. MR, thats fooking genius man! well there goes that idea up in flames... dagnabit...

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  135. If Germany beat England I will be very pleased :)

    Having said that this has all the hallmarks of being a very dire affair with the Italian nonce sticking 10 behind the ball and hopeing for a penalty shoot out. I anticipate the usual media shite about the 1st and second world wars etc and this of course will be taken on board by the english hooligan element particuly in the UK ( i understand the SA authorities will stand for no crap which perhaps explains why there are few yobs over there ) However i do fear a mass riot in various towns up and down the country due to the moronic element that has been encouraged to fluorish in sports tournaments particuly Football and now Wombledon and of course Criket.

    IMO England have benifited from a very easy qualifying campaign and also very easy group draw. The Germans are perhaps the best opposition they have so far met. Englands efforts are meaningless to me and I hope they fail and that bloody Italian gets sent packing along with Terry Gerrard and Beckham to name but a few.

    Come on Germany.

    and good luck to both Holland and Argentina in the final.

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  136. The only person I have heard mention WW1 and 2 is you DG3, so I presume your the hooligan element?

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  137. What about World War III?
    England v Germany 27/06/10.

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  138. ere dave i thought you was english what are you welsh or summat?

    i dont reckon thier wil be any rioting though if we win or lose... and no one should be bringing up the war. So we defeted the biggest evil to face the world in it entire history, and they just happened to be the germans... so what who cares?

    http://aldershotwoes.blogspot.com/2010/06/war.html


    http://aldershotwoes.blogspot.com/2010/06/war.html

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  139. I have Italy in the Robbo sweep stake. At first I thought it was a good bet. Look at it now for fuck sake!

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  140. mostly redundant said...

    I trust with a name like that you enjoyed the Budget :)

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  141. Ah, the longest tennis match ever is about to continue ... bet this'll be over in about 2 minutes.

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  142. ok agreed, i should not litter this blog with my anti-english sentiments, but i cant help my loathing and wish that they fail.

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  143. Hmmmmmm a little tetchy there DG3 but I will take it in jest, your obviously hormonal.

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  144. Fuck the world cup! We need to find out who horse boy is!!!

    http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/north_east_orkney_and_shetland/10401345.stm

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  145. This is just too good to let eh office firewall get in to the way.

    Straight from the bog, Go SLOVAKIA!!!!!!!!!

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  146. RedBlueArmy92 said...
    how do trotters, all good state side? how did the 6 or 7 people in the states who like football feel about beating the invinsible england in the group stages???
    --------------
    All good here, that Yanks are happy, tell 'em anything about 'em winning something and their self esteem goes up, they feel cured, justified and thinner, the shrinks go out of business for a week or two and everybody arranges barbecues.

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  147. Must agree Spit
    Italy are playing every dirty tactic tey can to survive though. Slovakia are slowly getting dragged into it aswell

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  148. RodTheFierce said...
    Fuck the world cup!
    ---------------------
    Easy for an Irish lad to say!

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  149. The world Cup fucks YOU!

    just look at that thing.

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  150. Come on Slovakia

    http://adampsb.blogspot.com/2010/06/argy-bargy.html

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  151. Haha, that quality mate, simple minds the yanks, i can appreciate that! good on em...

    So we could be looking at both the 06 finalists out before knock outs... a world cup first???

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  152. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  153. Whats the bluddy point?

    http://twitpic.com/1zjnv3/full

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  154. surely thats italy done now!!!

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  155. Well done Slovakia, but whats going on in that Wimbledon match 2 sets all and 67 games to 68 in the fifth....what the f..

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  156. 2-1... and that does them well enough 20 to go...

    mama-mia!

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  157. Splendid call by the linesman.

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  158. sorry and one more does them well enough as it stands...

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  159. More like it.

    Done a nation proud

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  160. Italy always have uncanny ability to get a penalty in stoppage time... beware!

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  161. What the Fuck!!

    Stay awake you buggers!

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  162. Pizza, pasta, garibaldi, Mussollinni your boys took one hell of...............Bollox

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  163. Oi ENGLAND!!! DONT YOU DARE PLAY SUMMAT LIKE THIS ON SUNDAY!

    cant bloody take it.


    Unless you win?

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  164. http://aldershotwoes.blogspot.com/2010/06/war.html

    Adam said it was crap... so surely worth a read?
    haha

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  165. well done Howard Webb and his fine English officiating team!

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  166. damn right Trott!

    webb done good.

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  167. Just listened to one of the Slowakian players. Poor sods will have to rebook their flights forward form Saturday.

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  168. One of the best matches of the WC so far, which ain't saying much, but fair do's

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  169. Italy out- fantastic

    New PSB blog up


    http://adampsb.blogspot.com/2010/06/yawn-tennis.html

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  170. I don't know whether the Beeb are a bunch of shit biscuits but ont he occasion I've met people there, the biscuits were well shit. Not a jammy dodger in sight and to be fair you'd have reckoned on at the very least a wagon wheel. Poor.

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  171. Scholesy's first day at getting his coach's badge: 'So er like when I do actually get to like drive the coach?'

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  172. I'm one of those 6 or 7 people in the US who cares about football, and I'm pleased as punch to be top of the group which included the team followed by a load of wankers who kept saying what a load of shite my country's team was. (There's a sentence just begging for a comma.)

    I'm just tired of continually explaining to friends, acquiantances, and co-workers that video replays, an additonal official, and/or actual time keeping would ruin the game, and how interesting and compelling the game is due to obviously incorrect calls being allowed to stand.

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  173. I'm sorry Robbo but if you had high standards then surely a chocolate Hob Nob, the king of biscuits for dunking in your brew. I myself have fallen on hard times and make do with a digestive. We all have dreams, I can only wish one day I can have A full packet of Hob nobs for me sen and a box of space raiders....heaven can wait

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  174. 'Kin 'ell Italy out as well as France ... we might have played shite but at least we've gotten past the group stages.

    Oh and well done to New Zealand ... they might be going home but they go home unbeaten having played their socks off all the way.

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  175. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  176. LFHS, you mean the Algerians?

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  177. Nah, Trot, those trash-talkin' Slovenians.

    I know the other guys are too busy working on WWII references to bother with the US.

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