Friday, 18 June 2010

Utter Bloody Rubbish

All right let's look at the positives.

Right, that's that done. It's unthinkable that these players tonked Croatia home and away. I can't remember an England team playing that badly. Seriously I can't. How long before Capello gets a brolly?

Let's look at the excuses:

1. Altitude. It's high up there. We know. That's why you got some practice in up there. It's not as high as some of the crawlers get up the backsides of these creaking millionaires. Not an excuse.

2. The ball. Yeah, well, everyone else seems to be getting a grip on it. It is a bloody ridiculous floaty bubble of a thing but you'd have thought a bit of nous might have conjured up a way of playing with it by now.

3. Algeria played well. They didn't. They were shit. Even the terminally slow centre-backs were never tested. If they'd had a bit more ambition, they could've nicked it.

4. It's been a long season. Truish, but nothing could surpass the length of that 90 minutes.

Here's the actual reason for England's failure to create nothing more than a Lamps in England shirt special of a passback to the keeper. We're not very good. It's simple.

We've got all the creativity of a dried-up felt-tip. Never have I seen such ineptitude from players in possession of the ball. It took each and every player on that park three or four touches to get the ball under control by which time every promising outlet had been blocked by a green shirt.

It was so stodgy. All crumble and no fruit. I reckon we could fire all 23 of them down that burst pipe in the Gulf and it'd be job done and that pasty CEO of BP wouldn't need to go in front of snarling Washington attack dogs looking like a shifty Piers Morgan minus the ugly aura.

At least that pitch won't need any fertiliser for three years after the heap of dung our boys ladelled on to it.

David James played well, but he'd have had more to do if he'd have stayed at home. The back four were never tested but pushed forward like nervous schoolboys peering in to an open tuck shop. Get in there Glen!!!!

The midfield were all sponge-boots and sheer pants. What we need to realise - and I'm surprised Capello hasn't - is that Lampard and Gerrard are not skilful pullers of midfield strings. They - oh God it's too transparent for words - are good a breaking forward into the box, not creating the opportunities themselves.

Barry did his usual nondescript thing. You only notice when he does something cack so he was quite prominent in this game. And Lennon, well he was sitting there watching the wheels go round and round.

'No honestly it is better if you sit with me and take your boots off'

Heskey was okay, but he is Heskey. He is as limited a footballer as I am a teetotaller. Even for the fleeting moments that Defoe received the ball he looked about 300% a better bet. We've done with Emile.

But the biggest disappointment was Rooney. He's still our best hope but my God was he crap last night. The first touch of an elephant seal. I almost wished he'd just clog someone and take a walk. Clearly the knock didn't help him but before then he'd illuminated the game with all the brilliant splendour of a firefly in the Albert Hall.

Can we beat Slovenia? Well, no. They're not world-beaters but they can do some of those things we can't like, I dunno, pass the ball to each other. There's a stupid deluded witless child of a Robbo inside me that tells me that we always start tournaments like this. We struggle, we strive, we are as coherent as a John Presott monologue and yet suddenly when we're up against we click and in adversity, we are reborn.

But I shall not listen. Cos at the moment, I am not angry. No. I am resigned. Let us not care too much for the chavs and scallies that wear our shirts and treat a football like it's an unwanted dog. Let us not grieve for the pucity of their imaginations or the unwarranted enormity of their bank accounts.

Can we ignore these wayward sons? Yes we can.

Can we turn instead to the grit and grind of the Swiss as they've shoves a giant toblerone into the orifices of the swaggering Spaniards? Yes we can.

Can we bliss out on the industry and talent of great swathes of more deserving footballers who can seemingly conjure magic from the malteser they've been asked to play with? I speak of Messi, of Sanchez (Chile), and hell-fucking-fire of Landon Donovan.

Coop is the one on the right

Can we devote our time to jeering as the German manager Dale Cooper throw his bottles of water around and Lukas Podolski fluffs chance after chance, including having a penalty saved by a man who cuts his own hair?

Or rejoicing with out Irish brothers that a French team of utter no-marks are finally hitting the buffers without Henry to play pat-a-cake with theoir opponents hopes?


Because this tournament has started to click. The South Americans are looking tasty, and pretty damn cynical when they need to be. The good ship Argentina are a joy to behold (although I'm not convinced Diego is anything more than an ornate carving on the prow - someone else is doing the donkey work there).

I bloody loved the last Euro Championships and now I realise why. We weren't there. The originators of football were just watching over the heighbours' fence and hoping that one day someone would give them their ball back.

Next time they should just keep it, cos frankly we haven't got a clue what to do with it.

It's a far cry from the glorious qualification, Capello oversaw. He looks clueless and bemused. But when your players simply don't bother to show up, what else can you do?

I don't think he can blame the poor saps who have paid 6 or 7 thousand quid for the privilege of watching an incredibly expensive turd go down the pan. Booing that performance was actually a generous response.

There is a corner of some foreign field that is forever England, and some numpty is taking it and always fucking well hitting the first man.


  1. First, at last.

    Absobloodylutely Robbo

  2. fact, having read all the pundits on the BBC, I reckon they might find a spot for a man of your calibre over there.

    Quite brilliant that you put all that together in a few hours with all those emotions getting in the way. 5 or 6 pundits they had, each spilling a few well worn cliches.

    We'll still win it, might not be quite as eye pleasing as Brazil or Argentina mind (excuse me, coughing fit).

  3. Robbo wrote:

    ......lets look at the positives.

    Right, that's that done.

    Hahahahaha. That was brilliant Robbo. The best introduction to a blog, EVER.

    Someone mentioned on the previous blog that Capello looks like Postman Pat. Amazing. He bloody does too.

    I graciously doff my cap to Robbo and the Postman Pat fellah.

  4. my god that was painful viewing.

    admission : when heskey stumbled over the ball like a pub player whod been for a few pies and a liquid lunch with his fat mate carragher i switched off and watched a recorded episode of wallender. i literally couldnt bear to look and chose the murder in swedish option.

    The Unlikeables played like old men, puffing and wheezing. they were gurning and frowning. they were hating every nanosecond. and so was i.

    everything we've ever said - spoilt over paid oversized boys who cant take real pressure becasue theyve lived in a little gold upholstered bubble all their pampered lives.

    i dont blame capello but he's as charmless a nerk as the rest of them

  5. Last night was just absolute crap. Let's hope all this does not come and haunt us.

  6. Morning lads. You lot also couldn't sleep? OUCH!!

  7. Robbo....... Let me add my tupence worth on your points

    1. Altitude. Bullshit!! Rustenburg is high, we get a silly draw. Cape Town is a sea level. The stadium is 23m or so above sea level.... And oh, Joburg is higher than Rustenburg and Argentina won both their games there. So Altitude excuse is bullswipe at the most

    2. The ball. Enough said about it already

    3. Algeria played well. If they'd played well they'd have punished us big. So, we played shit i agree

    4. It's been a long season. What long season? Heskey didn't play in the FA cup final, or did he, he didnt play the Champs league, or did he? Same as all the other guys. Only Rooney and who else played more games. So bullcrap still

  8. Agent Cooper: Capello, my dream is a code waiting to be broken. Break the code, solve the crime.
    Capello(taking notes): Break the...code, solve the...crime.

  9. All Premiership players are playing crap...
    And England team have no rights to give fucking excuses about altitude and ball...

  10. morning monk. beckenbauer was wrong - kick and rush? kick and amble more like.

    still, we should beat slovenia. cough. cough.

  11. So far, Slovenia have played better than England, Algeria & USA. It will be a difficult game for England to score a goal, forget about winning it...

  12. not that im suggestible or nuffink but ive just ordered the twin peaks box set - never seen it

  13. england always play better against better opposition. we'll thrash slovenia and go on to the final where we....

  14. now im reading that Bert Shuttlebuck of Grays in Essex wants to buy the Anfield groundsman's lawnmower

  15. "Nice to see your home fans boo you. That's what loyal support is." Rooney

    doesnt really get it, does he? what would it cost to go and watch that display? £3000? more? how long does it take him to earn that? 6 nanoseconds? youre not in the real world pal.

  16. great blog robbo. i agree with 'creaky millionaires' - these lads seem to have forgotten what it means to represent a country. although i sure as hell hope they haven't. somehow. very good rhetorical flourish at the end, well done.

  17. anyways, happy 64th birthday, cap

    When I get older,
    losing my hair,
    many years from now,
    will you still be sending me a valentine, birthday greetings, bottle of wine?


  18. does this mean rooney has to move into a trailer and grow a bushy ginger beard?

  19. Robbo... you have it spot on mate... agreed with every fucking word.

    Rooney, needs to come to terms with who he is... a football player... that's it my old son, nothing more... the fans booed you because they are fed up paying you mountains of moolah in order for you to swan around the football pitch like it was a sunday stroll with the missus.

    G'day all... good to see you back blog, you have been missed mate.

  20. Morning all. I have to take issue with one point in your blog Robbo and that is the title. "Utter Bloody Rubbish"? You must've been watching a different game to the rest of us.

    We weren't that good. Or is it simply that if you'd put what you really thought of it you would have to put the adult content filter back on?

  21. To be honest after hearing the BBC pundits saying that the USA - Slovenia result was irrelevant because England were by far the best team in the group and would qualify without a problem, I quite enjoyed that result. Rooney, you should've played for Ireland, we would never boo you.

  22. great blog should get angry more often. must be easy being an england/boro fan

    loved the last line about the corner hitting the 1st man.

    i think Roo had a nightmare, but class is permanent and he is a very very good player. as for the strop, well that's no surprise now is it.

    as for the rest of our sorry lot...i'd like to see a couple of big names dropped, but who to replace them? who the man at Nike says..."just do it"

    actually i think we'll beat Slovenia..and i know what i'm talking about. i tipped us to hammer algeria, so there.

    Netherlands v Japan soon..should be good

  23. RodTheFierce said...
    To be honest after hearing the BBC pundits saying that the USA - Slovenia result was irrelevant because England were by far the best team in the group and would qualify without a problem, I quite enjoyed that result.

    That's the biggest problem Rod. On paper we're good. The problems are because we're playing on grass not paper.

  24. RodTheFierce said...
    To be honest after hearing the BBC pundits saying that the USA - Slovenia result was irrelevant because England were by far the best team in the group and would qualify without a problem, I quite enjoyed that result. Rooney, you should've played for Ireland, we would never boo you.

    i'm with you there, Rod

    why is it these idiots think that we're better than other teams when we struggle against them...FFS

    as for the Irish never booing Rooney....not in the world cup they wouldn't.

    I enjoyed the ITV commentator remarking on how 10 of the algerian 11 were born in France but play for Algeria...he thought that was strange.
    Irony being he was sitting next to that well known irishman Andy Townsend at the time.

  25. Today's top betting tips.......

    A treble on Holland, Ghana and Denmark and also Holland, Ghana and Denmark/Cameroon to draw.

    And unlike 59th I really know what I'm talking about as I backed England to win 3-0 and 4-0 last night.

  26. Excellent blog, Robbo

    Agree with every word

  27. Haha Colch, yeah but I think theres a distinction between confidence and arrogance that the BBC would do well to observe. Even Roy Hodgson was joining in the orgy of self-righteousness. Maybe thats the teams problem, they feel they should walk these games.

    Rooney was frustrated and isolated and he never plays well when that happens. Youse need to use your full backs more and play Joe Cole. Its the dumbest exclusion ever. What is Capello playing at?

  28. I woke up from a nightmare, then realised I'd been watching England play shite.

    Before last night I was wallowing in the relative success of seeing Spain lose, France lose Italy draw and Germans lose, thinking our time has now come

    But no, EMBARRASSINGLY no, no, no, when you can only reflect and say Heskey and Carragher were ok, James also, but then he didnt have anything to do, that was an aboslute plastic bag full of shit

  29. tone1947 said...
    that was an aboslute plastic bag full of shit

    I totally disagree with you Tone. The bag was made of shit and was full of shit and then put in a big box of shit before being transported in a lorry with even more shit and taken away to the manure farm.

  30. Is FC to blame? I dont think so. Do the media overhype our chances, of course they do, esp that twat of a BBC sports editor.
    We try to believe it, but deep down and just for you GAZ,we know we are average(or less)

    If you have an internationally proven manager(albeit at club level),(you can even add SGE to that)and you still play with basically the same players, does it not say it is the everpaid players that cant cut it

    We lack individual skill and vision, which is natural or otherwise, with that, the manager can mould the performance

    BTW, I still support England

  31. Everpaid? Should they be ever paid?

    Overpaid, who believe in their own shit thats been deposited on Colchs manure farm

  32. i still maintain that the main skill england lack is the ability to play 5-a-side...that sort of keep-ball seems beyond us.

    anyhoo..for those of you who have money to burn:
    Nl 2-1 Jpn
    Ghana 2-0 Aus
    Cam 1-2 Den

    dead certs...

  33. Let's start giving them performance related pay. A flat rate of £5k per week and then bonuses based on how they perform. After last night all of the England team would have to pay the FA about 50 grand each to cover the shocking performance.

  34. Rooneys post match statement

    "Nice to see your own fans booing you, that's what loyal support is."

    If FC has balls, he should put him on the bench for that

  35. The only dead certs in life 59th are that England will go into a tournament being over hyped by the press while the players will talk about being good enough to win and how this is our year. And then like every other tournament they will under perform and disappoint the fans.

  36. So after all the previous positive thoughts, time to get ready for todays games

    Wouldnt it be fun if Aus won, so all teams in Ger group have 3 pts

  37. tone1947 said...
    Rooneys post match statement

    "Nice to see your own fans booing you, that's what loyal support is."

    From the TV coverage it seemed as though the England fans were backing the team the whole way through and tried to lift the team with their singing. It's probably the first game where the singing has been louder than the vulvas. It was only after the final whistle that they showed what they thought of the performance and having paid thousands to go and watch it they have every right to voice their displeasure.

  38. So
    James - Nothing to say, nothing to do
    Johnson - does he understand that playing right back actually means sometimes playing right back
    Carragher - did OK, but pace is not in his dictionary
    Terry - still got his dick in Vanessas Knickers
    Cole - thinking too much how much the geordie slapper is going to take him for
    Lennon - FFS
    Lampard - I cant play with SG
    Gerrard - I'm captain. Its an honour to play shite
    Gareth Barry - shouldnt he be welsh?
    Heskey - tried his hardest, poor soul
    Rooney - same as Lennon

  39. losing rio is part of the problem england have. with gerrard as captain, cap wont sub him for joe cole when needed. gerrard dont play on the left wing, ashley cole was ignored so every attack went central or on the right wing - predictable n ineffective. lamps is vice captain, he wont get subbed. probly upson plays next game with only dawson as cover for 2 centre backs - but does it matter?

  40. thanks for the laffs, Engerland! the world desperately needs such humour.

    Robbo - what would you do if England (or Boro for that matter) weren't always cack?
    you're like the Basil Fawlty of Sports Journos - and i mean that in the nicest possible way, mate ;)

  41. On the official FIFA site

    Ashley Cole - Man of the Match?

    Are they having a laugh?

  42. I have found one positive from all of this shite:

    DavidGilmourThe3rd is the happiest man in England today.

  43. mornin' Lads,

    Very rarely do I post something serious (especially after Denis) but Rooney really needs to come out with a public apology, not just for his rant but for his performance too. Perhaps Bobby Charlton could have a word with him?

    Tip of the cap to Nobby Stiles, get well soon. There's a bloke that typified with his effort and commitment what it should mean to wear the England shirt.

    I hope Capello rings in the changes, everyone of the available bench should get the start no matter how inferior they are "on paper".

  44. What about positively shit?

  45. spot on, Trotsky... shows Wazza's simply amazing lack of intellect and perspective - it was an inappropriate and indefensible attack by the man-child that can't seem to ever quite grow up.

    any rioting in your neck over that Mali ref? between that guy and Roo, i tell ya...

  46. The fans shouldn't have booed though. Its not like you were thumped 2 or 3 nil.

  47. Of course the fans should've booed Rod. It was a dreadful performance. What is it with the pampered primadonnas. They love the praise when they do well but get upset by criticism when they do poorly. Rooney has been defended by pundits saying that it was a heat of the moment comment but that's no excuse. It will be interesting to see the fans reaction to Rooney in the next game.

  48. I'm of the opinion that supporters support their team. It was a drab performance, much like most England matches under Capello, you'd think you would be used to it by now. Booing doesn't help anything, it just makes the players more nervous for the next game. In fact, I'd almost say its retarded.

  49. Denis, it seems as if the USA goal being disallowed might be a good thing for football over here. Made the front page of the papers and all the news shows. Even the NY Times has a colour picture and story on the front page. Unprecedented coverage.

    No riots but there's a rumour that a squadron of B52's are en route to Mali.

    As for Rooney, if he'd run his balls off and been committed to the cause he might have a case but he played as if he was on drugs, half hearted and ineffective at best, uninterested at worst. I wouldn't boo any of them but whoever wants to boo them certainly has the right to do so.

    I'd like to know what the bloke who got in the dressing room had to say, chances are we'd all agree with him.

  50. Good shout Colchester FC re. performance pay.

    Just think. Every week 100 grand goes into your bank account. Obviously it's gonna send you apeshit. 5 million a year for kicking and heading a Jubalani. It's nuts. I cannot for the life of me relate to these overpaid prima donnas anymore.

    COME ON NORTH KOREA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  51. You see this is the problem. This is why no England player will want to play for his country. Cuz whats the point? All the fans think you're an overpaid prima donna. Can't youse just for one month leave all that shite behind and support your team. For f**ks sake, talk about cutting off your nose to spite your face. Best fans in the world my ass.

  52. I heard the bloke who got into the dressing room hurled a lot of abuse at the team, really told them a few home truths then left to celebrate his 64th birthday.

    Rod, Rooney was total shite; whatever excuse you try to make for him does not alter the fact that he was worse than a man short last night... Just keeping it real mate.

    G'day all.

  53. Hey RodTheFleece

    The clue is in my name. Cockney rhyming slang anyone? Sweaty Sock = ?

    Just keeping it real for the working class that STILL make up the majority of footie supporting fans everywhere.

  54. g'day Bo, Blimey, Harry Kewell is still playing? How kewell is that? I thought he'd retired about 5 years ago!

    Problem with Rooney is that we believe and expect he'll be the best bloke on our team so when he turns out to be the worst it's all a bit much eh!

  55. You are so predictable Rod... if the fans hadn't booed you would have found another reason to come here and bleat about the England team or the England fans... it is in the nature of being an AB? (in this case ABE)... I should know I am an ABU :p

  56. Trott... if you had read some of my posts leading up to the WC I said that we shouldn't placve to much emphasis on Rooney... he isn't as special as a lot of the fans think he is... and so far at this wc he has been less than ordinary... off to watch the aussies destroy ghana.

  57. Whatever you want to think Bo, after all this I think youse are the worst fans in the world. Thank Christ I'm not English. I'd most likely top myself.

  58. Hello RodTheFleece

    Check the posts. About 5 up. I'm the last person on Earth that would want anything other than total humiliation for our Southern brothers and sisters.

    However, I still CANNOT relate to overpaid, overweight, overhyped, overhere, overthere beligirent bag of lard. i.e. modern footie players that don't give a pluck.

  59. I'm not very good at Cockney slang. Is it tiny cock?

  60. I'm only messin Sweaty Sock. Why does everyone need to relate to footballers? They're celebrities, of course you can't relate to them. They probably spend more on their toothbrushes than we do on TVs.

  61. RodTheFleece

    We all know you have a tiny cock. It's nothing personal. It's not the size that matters (looks away and whistles).

    Here are some BIG clues:

    Bannockburn, Wembley 1977, Kenny Dalglish, 1967, Jinky Johnstone and Jim Baxter. Intifada against Gary McAllister.

    Get the picture yet?

  62. I see Anelkas getting sent home for having a heated discussion with Mystic Dom. They're truly fecked now.

  63. I'm plucking Welsh and proud you tattie muncher. ERRRRRRRRRRR, wait a minute. That should have said:

    I'm plucking Welsh and proud you tattie muncher but I'm really a Sweaty Sock and long live Ally McLeod and Davie Narey.

  64. It is all part of watching football but Rooney's comments were disgraceful. Those loyal fans had travelled a bloody long way and forked out (apparently) a 100 quid plus for a ticket.
    If he scores he will expect cheers, why? For doing his bloody job? Capello is supposedly the highest paid manager in International football, he better start earning his money.

  65. So another Aussie sent packing... at least there was some justification this time... that might just end their chances of getting through to the final 16 methinks.

  66. Bo, I think Rooney is a brilliant footballer with amazing talent. However, if he doesn't tackle, doesn't run and gives the ball away when he gets it, we'd be better off with you or me in the team.

  67. Trotter

    I would loooooooooove to see you and Bo in the England team. As Gaz Utd said, I would donate a testicle.

  68. what is it with all you Scotts and Irish, don't you have any use for your testicles?

  69. I have mighty plans for my testicles ce soir.

  70. I agree Trott... I am not laying the blame for our poor performance at rooney's feet... the whole team was bad... but because everyone expects so much of him, when he has a game like he did the other night, it really stands out... why was he allowed to stay on the pitch for the 90 minutes... when Heskey (who i have no time for usually but he has probably been englands best player over the two games) was taken off... just didn't make sense to me.

  71. Hey Trotter

    Don't know about the famine lads but my balls are well underused. They're just hanging there with nothing to do. Anything for a good laugh. Yup, anything.

  72. Rod, who's the lucky victim, Colleen?

    Yes Bo, at least Heskey was working, even made an effort in defence.

  73. Rabster said...

    It is all part of watching football but Rooney's comments were disgraceful. Those loyal fans had travelled a bloody long way and forked out (apparently) a 100 quid plus for a ticket.

    If he scores he will expect cheers, why? For doing his bloody job? Capello is supposedly the highest paid manager in International football, he better start earning his money.


    All of that doesn't matter. You want England to do well, so get behind your team. I feel sorry for Rooney cuz hes a sensitive type and would pick up on the booing more than anyone else probably. But sure its your God given right to boo your own team. I can't think of any other country that would boo their own players for drawing a match. Doesn't that tell you anything??

    The reason the players don't bust a gut running at or after players is most likely because Capello doesn't want anyone to move out've position, not because they don't care. But sure youse always need some kind of bullshit melodrama surrounding your team. I blame Eastenders.

  74. Btw I'm Scots Irish catholic so it's not a sectarian thingy. COME ON LADY MACBETH!!!!!!

  75. Aye Trots. God help her, I've got balls like watermelons.

  76. RodTheFierce said...
    Whatever you want to think Bo, after all this I think youse are the worst fans in the world. Thank Christ I'm not English. I'd most likely top myself.

    Don't let not being English stop you Rod.

  77. I feel sorry for Rooney cuz hes a sensitive type


    surely i'm hallucinating... if not, that has to be one of the most daft comments on a blog that's long been famous for daft comments.

    no - definitely hallucinating.

  78. Pluck me. I'm feeling a wee bitty pished. COME ON THE JUBALANI. Leveller of nations.

  79. On the bucky again Perspiration-ridden foot cover?

  80. Colch if I went you'd be sad. Who would take up the mantle of being the supreme custodian of keeping it real? Who could fill my realistically sized boots?

  81. Whys it a stupid comment?


    ha! take a bow, Rodney.

    do you do parties?

  82. Rod McPlod

    School holidays begin. Sucking on mammy's nips? Come back when the hair starts to grow.

  83. The reaction of the fans is sadly all too predictable and falls back on the same old reliables - "overpaid, lazy, primadonnas" etc.

    Does anyone think that these players actually dont care? They are overpaid, everyone knows that but their poor performance wasnt because they didnt try or dont care. Anyone watching the game will have seen how frustrated and knackered the players looked at the end. But because they earn 100k a week they automatically dont care? England won the world cup in 1966 on home soil but before and after they havent acheived a great deal internaionally whether the players were on 10 pounds or 100k so I dont see what salary or anything else has got to do with it.

    The problem is clearly a tactical one - nothing to do with effort or desire. This seems to be a uniquely English criticism. Plenty of the big nations have had poor performances - Spain, Italy, Germany, France etc. Are their fans ready to get on their backs at the earliest oportunity? No they at least wait until the campaign is over and try to get behind the team while there is still a chance to qualify.

    Its because the players know that they are in for this kind of lambasting as soon as they make an error or dont win a game easily that has them o tenterhooks to begin with and it does nothing but make the job at hand harder. Why, as fans, can we not just be happy to get to a world cup and hope rather than expect and demand and criticise.

    England has a number of problems but desire and effort are not any of them. Its lack of direction and cohesion. Its having an abscence of talent in certain areas, its the fact that good players dont always mean a good team. By all means it was a poor display but take a look around - there are plenty of other countries that have underperformed. You dont have to applaud the team for a bad display but it comes across as so spoilt when fans boo their own team. Maybe if England had actually failed to qualify it could be warranted but with a game to go knowing a win puts them through this is a very poor reaction from the fans and is hardly going to make the next match any easier for the players.

    As for positives Robbo, the team can still qualify. That is positive enough for me.

  84. RodTheFierce said...
    Colch if I went you'd be sad. Who would take up the mantle of being the supreme custodian of keeping it real? Who could fill my realistically sized boots?

    I prefer to think of you as king of the WUMs Rod. You seem like the sort who could start an argument in an empty room.

  85. I love how people on this blog think they win arguments by offering no argument at all. He is a very sensitive type. Its the main reason he rants and raves more than most is because he picks up on things more hence hes more sensitive.

    Sweaty Cock, calm down would you. What hair are you referring to? Have you got your green pube yet?

  86. question for Rodney DangerFiece: which post-Impressionist painter do you think Sensitive Wayne identifies with the most? surely the soft pastels of Cezanne's later work capture Wazza's soul in quieter moments...

  87. Alan Morris. The voice of reason. Here here!

  88. er, DangerFierce... or perhaps DangerFleece?

  89. Alan_Morris said...
    England has a number of problems but desire and effort are not any of them.

    Did you watch Rooney's performance Alan. He didn't look interested. Normally when he has a bad game he at least chases and tries to win the ball but last night it looked like he'd given up. And his reaction at the end was disgraceful. If he's happy to take the applause when he plays well he has got to accept the boos when he plays as poorly as he did last night.

  90. Impressionist art is shit, its just a load of blurry colours. Impressionist musics a lot better. I would compare Wayne to Smetna's Ma Vlast except maybe the triumphant end seeing that England will win nothing with fans like these.

  91. Alan, the problem I have is that the desire and effort you saw, I didn't and particularly in the case of Rooney.

  92. Alan_Morris...

    Tell me you had "God save the Queen" playing in the background when you composed that Churchillian epic of a post. ;-)

  93. Colch I think you're 100% wrong. The team are putting their trust in Capello's tactics and that involves Rooney staying upfront and not running all over the place. The really f**king stupid thing about it is that a year ago youse were probably complaining that he didn't stay upfront enough. Bunch of hypocrites who deserve nothing but failure, cuz ultimately thats what youse really want anyway.

  94. RodThePube

    Get thee to the Guardian

    Hahahahahahaha. Rod(tool)TheFierce(hahahahhahaa, if I don't stop laughing I'm gona have an aneurysm.

    You're not English so stay away.

  95. right then - knew you was a WUM.

  96. On the BBC main football page there's an Eng v Alg "Highlights" vid!

    HIGHLIGHTS!!!!! Lol

  97. I see Wazza's theme song this week as more of a nutless Roberta Flack 'Killing Me Softly' hummed to a strumming accompaniment by Fabio.

    Prior to the WC I had him more of a Metalica 'For Whom The Bell Tolls' with watermelons like Rodders for his bollocks.

  98. Look at the amount of ground Rooney covered in the game - his problem is he is struggling to play off Heskey and find the positions. I just dont think Rooney is half as effective playing off someone like Heskey as he is in other roles.

    The very fact he made the comments he did, ill advised as they were, shows how frustrated he was and how much the booing stung him. He played poorly but it wasnt because hed rather be on holiday somewhere else or counting his money at home.

  99. looking for a decent moisturizer - is this Rooney's, For Sensitive Skin any good?

  100. What the f**k is sweaty cocks problem? Being an Irish Catholic I felt maybe theres some affinity between us but obviously not. Pure ragin.

  101. Again Denis, that isn't an argument.

  102. A gutsy performance from the aussies, not enough to keep them in it though... I wish the English team had as much heart and determination as the aussies showed tonight.

    What load of bollocks you are talking there Rod... Rooney is a sensitive lad my arse.. maybe when he is around grannies he may go all soft (maybe that's not quite the word I'm looking for there) but I don't seem him getting all teary-eyed over sunsets.

  103. Hey Rod McPlod

    I just take umbrage with 100,000 per week prima donnas that don't give a pluck.

    Cal me naive, ignorant, green if you like.

    BUT, I prefer the footballer that would die for the cause, sweat blood and shit for the honour.

    Ultimately, I love footballers that give it ALL for the nation they are lucky enough to represent.

  104. why argue? i only wish i'd come up with "i feel sorry for Wayne cuz he's a sensitive type"

    just look at it - marvel at its comedic brilliance!

    all hail Rodney DangerFierce!

  105. good news, Rooney has issued an apology, we can all love one another again and move on to victory.

  106. Denis, you understand the context in what I mean. You're argument is comparing him to a stereotypical sensitive type. I'm saying hes sensitive to chants and vibes from the crowd which he is. And also everyone knows how painfully shy the guy can be.

    Bo, the whole granny story was like 6 years ago. No wonder hes losing his patience with England "supporters".

    Sweaty Sock, theres no need to be rude dear. And also, the only player I can think of who maybe fits your description of a decent footballer is Neil Lennon. Which is ironic because he was a pretty shit footballer.

  107. Yep... I'm moving on... glad I don't have to make any more comments on the last performance... I'm running out of disparaging remarks about the bloody team.

    I'm off to bed guys... when I wake up in the morning, last night's game will be a distant memory buried with other past rubbish games never again to be mentioned... it's the only way I can follow England.

    Type to y'all later.... Mbae mi lukem yufala bakegen

  108. Roo played very badly, got booed...
    so he had a pop back...

    we can hardly complain at Wayne if all he did was what the crowd were doing to him, a few verbals.
    ...and he has said sorry, not sure if that was for his performance, his strop or that granny thing.

    Roo hat-trick against slovenia...just you watch.

  109. Some good news from the world cup......

    it seems as though we were so bad that the fans couldn't even be bothered to get upset and get arrested.

  110. TrotterUSA said...

    I'd like to know what the bloke who got in the dressing room had to say


    "Hello, I'm here about the managers job. My training includes 5 years of modern dance and 6 years of tap."

  111. Rodders is being taken to cleaners by Sock... LOL!!!

  112. i don't think so SS11, i believe they just had opposing views on an issue...

    ...and some amoosing banter along the way.

    hey ho...

    ho hum...

  113. Up the Danes. Bendtner against Song :)

  114. nice blog robbo

    first touch of an elephant seal hahaha

  115. Postman Fab, Postman Fab,
    Postman Fab and his chocolate Lab,
    Early in the morning,
    As the USA is scoring,
    Fab picks out the best team that he can.

    Postman Fab, Postman Fab,
    Postman Fab and his chocolate Lab,
    All the fans are singing,
    And the day is just beginning,
    Fab feels he's a really happy man.
    Everybody knows, that England can,
    All the fans will smile as he waves to greet them,
    Maybe, you can never be sure,
    There'll be a knock, ring, a call up at your door,
    Ha ha,

    Postman Fab, Postman Fab,
    Postman Fab and his chocolate Lab,
    All the fans are singing,
    And the game is just beginning,
    Fab feels he's a really happy man,
    Fab feels he's a really happy man,
    Fab feels he's a really happy man

  116. Good song Trott but I feel a previous world cup anthem would be more appropriate at this time.........

    We're coming home
    We're coming home
    We're coming
    England's coming home

  117. nooo colch, The Carpenters 'we've only just begun' is today's anthem!

  118. Just as long as it's nothing by the Boo-Radleys

  119. Fabio Capello was wheeling his shopping trolley across the supermarket car park when he noticed an old lady struggling with her bags of shopping. He stopped and asked, "Can you manage dear?" To which the old lady replied, "No way. You got yourself into this mess, don't ask me to sort it out!"

  120. The England team went out to visit an orphanage in Cape Town on Saturday morning.
    "It's good to put a smile on the faces of people with no hope, constantly struggling and facing the impossible," said Jamal Umboto, aged 6.

  121. The FA have launched an inquiry to find out how a fan found his way into the dressing room. And another inquiry into how Shaun Wright Phillips found his way into the dressing room.

  122. My ex-wife got hit by a bus yesterday. I thought, "Damn, why couldn't it have been me instead?"

    And then I remembered, I don't know how to drive a bus!

  123. If US and England go through all of the tiebreakers, I'd rather challenge England to a PK shoot-out than draw lots. I like our chances better that way.

  124. Jesse...

    Agreed but only if we swap goalkeepers first! You get Green and we'll take Howard!

  125. I'd go for Hart in a penalty shoot out Jay. He's got a decent track record of saving them. If we get into the knock out stages and go to extra time and we've still got a substitute left I hope that Capello will take off James and put Hart on.

  126. Colch, I like Hart too but given Capellos record on subs I can't see that happening! I'm still absolutely clueless as to what he was trying to do with the subs used against Algeria. I've got this awful feeling that we'll start the same 11 next game. Fingers and toes crossed but God help us! Please!

  127. Hi peeps.

    Well that was a diobolical performance yesterday wasn't it?

    And England were even worse.

    If we'd of played 100 times better, we would of been shit. I felt ashamed of that performance.

    I'm all for supporting your team through thick and thin, but if the good people in the ground felt like booing then that is their right, they expected and deserved better. It's not the end of the world (cup) but without a vast improvement in performance and attitude the adventure will be over.

  128. I don't see how he can possibly justify starting with the same team again. If he does I'm not sure even God will be able to do enough to save us. I think he'll go with Rooney up front on his own supported by Gerrard and with Joe Cole wide left.

  129. At least the Dutch won. Not the greatest of performances, but here in the Dungheap nobody (Noone's (Plymouh) Dutch cousin) seemed to mind, 6 points in the bag and already assured a place in the next round is good business here in the Lowlands.

  130. Evening H2. And at least it guarantees you an extra busy day in the pub. Good for the country but more importantly good for your business.

  131. Robbo - insightful stuff and very correct - thats all I can say right now - I feel like when Boro got relegated.

    The internet may still show your team as listed in the big league - but within your eyes tears are forming and within your soul a spirit is breaking.

  132. Millions of us have been asking for that formation colch - lets hope Capello finally succumbs and gives it a go, after all - what have we got to lose now!
    On another note, Rooney looks knackered! I think he burnt out after a long hard season at MU - cheers Fergy!

  133. Terry's backpass!!!! eh
    It was like watching Boro get beat by Watford and Plymouth and every fucker else (well it seemed like that at times) - bubbles burst but on such a scale and in such a way is imo unique

  134. Hope you feeling better Colch - just about to check on yr bet - not siure how Ghana went - and get well soon for your Dungheap visit!!!!

  135. Terry's backpassage has always been questionable.

  136. Ghana only drew FBH and played against 10 men for an hour after Kewell got sent off. Other two results came in but that wasn't good enough. Am hoping that my golf bets come in to make up for it.

  137. o England fans were arrested after Friday's match with Algeria, despite the 25,000-strong following being left furious at their team's showing.

    UK police in the country praised their reaction to the 0-0 draw in Cape Town, describing them as "extremely well behaved", even when drinking.

    Ch Supt Lewis said many of the supporters were "well-heeled" and "not your normal England followers".

    He said: "It's a different set of supporters than we would normally see."


    no shit sherlock! How much does it cost to get out there for a game?

  138. Fifa says it will make a formal comment on Monday on the performance of referee Koman Coulibaly in the United States' 2-2 draw with Slovenia.

    The Mali official, who was taking charge of his first World Cup match, ruled out a potential winner for the USA in the closing stages but refused to identify who he had penalised.


    see, i thought it wasnt a free kick in the first place. Altidore spent a lot of the time grabbing hold of the defender and pushing him about just before the ball came to him and then threw himself to the ground.

  139. Booooooooooooooooooooo!


  140. ROBBO!!!

    Read back this...

    "Or rejoicing with out Irish brothers that a French team of utter no-marks are finally hitting the buffers"

    Rejoicing with OUT us??

    FFS just because you lot are shit now you want to take over the jeer at the French job!!

    I told you you need a sub! As does Heskey.

  141. Are they England's next opponents FBH?

    You'll be lucky to get a draw.

  142. My top betting tips for Wimbledon.........

    Andy Murray won't win it

    Don't back any british woman to still be there in the second week.

  143. Gaz - well spotted - you got the " we hate the french" gig - but as the was sumat to do with a french bloke making a speech in WW2 (aka it'll all kick off 2) about how france shuld withstand the nazis - interestingly he made the broadcast in London then objected to UK membership of EC (yes it was the EC before it was the EU but not sure when it changed) - anyway we hated the french before you lot :)

  144. I would be very happy if Muzza won it - if only because I lived in Dunblane for a while - and as someone from northenglnd I am closure to Eburgh than That Landon:)

  145. Robbie Earl - cpmments please - naive my shitter - trying to recover a bad position my view - shame as he seemed decent .....

  146. But everyone hated you lot before anyone else so you've kind of got a winning hand!!

    I did a module on the EU this year FBH so I can fill you in on the order of how things happened if you like.

    Perhaps during the next England match, it's bound to be more interesting listening to the internal workings of the EU

  147. Robbie Earle - Naive? No.

    Doing anything different than anyone else does? No.

    Got caught? Yes.

  148. Gazza - stop being so Irish :)

    I told u I did EU Law beofre - direct indirect effect of directives Francowich and shit????

    THe HR stuff interest me more but a bit too academic for me

    Who ya gunna support now France are out - England will win next week (and I will be pissed i the pub on wed afternoon no doubt) _ still - loolks like Arg, Hol, Brazilsih (I wud have said the fatherland but that defeat - real sad ..... chukcle ..)

  149. Honestly FBH, like I've said before, I couldn't give a monkeys.

    I'd have been hard pressed to even support Ireland if they were there.

    International football just doesn't appeal to me. But then nationalistic bullshit doesn't either.

    And this World Cup is like every other World Cup - SHIT!!

    I dunno how anyone expects national teams to be better than club teams when club teams can buy the best players no matter where they're from and they play together every week.

    Plus you don't have to buy Heskey.

  150. I will again be putting my blind faith in england and backing them to win the game with a bet on lampard, heskey and gerrard to score the first goal. maybe i should just go outside and set fire to a pile of money instead. it will hurt as much but at least it will be quicker.

  151. "Plus you don't have to buy Heskey."
    Someone forgot to tell Martin O'Neill that rule and according to some rags (it's probably bs) he want's to sign Robbie Keane as well.

    Aston Villa are a great team, Charity sponser on their shirts and charity cases in them.

  152. Yep H2H there was a time when Martin O'Neill was being touted as great.

    But then he signed Heskey. And he signed him again.

    And he could have been England manager so you'd still have had him.

  153. Ehglands red kit for the next game;

  154. Gaz,

    We all poke fun at Heskey because......well, he's Heskey. But he seemed like the only player in an England shirt who actually gave a crap, for that he has my respect. (He's still a donkey though)

  155. Is it correct that Cap only took Heskey as it wud make Roonwy score more goals? A goal wud b nice!!!!

  156. G'day all.

    I agree H2... I have advocated the last two games be Heskey free but he has been the only player in both games that has earned his place... I'd take a second rate group of players (no Gaz, that isn't what we have now)that are going to give their all every game over a group of overpaid, spoiled primadonna's (what we do have now)anytime.

  157. fbh.
    I thought it was because he lost a bet with M O'Neill!?

  158. Hey Bo.

    Shame what happened to the Aussies today, they looked in control before the Kewell incident.

  159. I noticed Bendtner scored yesterday... is he going to score more than Rooney in the cup?

  160. At least the sending off was justified H2 not like Cahill's red.

    I said last night H2... I wish England had as much heart and determination as the aussie boys.

  161. The Aussies are all but out of the cup now... they need to beat Serbia (possible) and Ghana to beat Germany (most unlikely).. but there is that slim chance and you can be certain they'll be giving it their all.

  162. Would be nice Bo.

    Bendy scored a Bentner style poke in. I hope Rooney comes good, but he looks jaded, like he's still carrying an injury or something.

  163. BojanglesOfOz said...

    no Gaz, that isn't what we have now


    Too fucking right it's not.

    That would be an insult to the Championship mob.

  164. I'd take a few Bendy type poke in's at the moment H2... I'd take any bloody thing at the moment.

    There are a few players that look like they are jaded mate... I am not going to blame Capello for what has happened so far... except in his selection criteria for this squad... when he took over as manager he said something about only selecting players that were fit and in form... half the squad that he selected were either injured and out of form or coming back from an injury and out of form... apart from that the players are totally responsible for they way they have played.

  165. "We're still in the race. The boys were fighting for everything and with everything they had. I can only be proud of the players."

    Guess which manager didn't say this.

  166. Fab's selection policy is indeed a mystery, this team is basically Brolly's and Svens team too. (As pointed out by Blogidy)
    But I suppose there are no better, I just hope he now looks towards the future and gives the youth (not sure who though) a chance in the next campaign.

  167. And so the witchhunt begins...

    It's like the bible, half of it contradicts the other half.

  168. Maybe we'll finally get rid of the Gerrard, Lampard dilemma... the last three managers have tried and failed with those two.

    Where is Trott, we need his ever optimistic input here... it's all a bit too negative at the moment.

  169. Gaz as a budding journalist you must realise you need a good witchhunt... it's almost as lucrative as a good conspiracy theory in selling advertising.

  170. Read the blog and all the replies in the last 24 hours.

    Why am I the only person to express my opinion that is against the booers?

    Why boo your own team?

    So you paid thousands on tickets and hotels and booze, what does it entitle you to?

    A glorious win?

    No, actually, a place for your arse to be placed. Thats it.

    Football supporters, for club and for country are supposed to SUPPORT their team. Good or bad or just plain shit.

    If you are so worried about the lack of return on your investment in tickets, flights and merchendise, THEN STAY THE FUCK AWAY and let someone else buy the tickets at a fraction of the price they are going for thanks to the bloated prices being paid to touts.

    England are not very good at football and any sane person knows that. Why the outrage? Why the shock?

    Of course Rooney should have kept his gob shut as well just like that CEO of BP who wanted his fucking life back.

    All said and done, hey presto, England are still in it. The sun was out. Chicken Balti Pie is still awsome. Sex is still fun.

  171. Gaz, that article is all that is wrong with the Britidh rag media, ass kissing and shit stirring all rolled into a piece of dribble.
    Who are these senior sources they are always quoting?

    Bo, I'm not really pessimistic (yes I am) I was just never really thayt optimistic about Englands chances although even I didn't think they'd be this bad. I've been posting for awhile saying that all our so called "world class" players are far from that, Gaz has too, I remember we agreed on that matter a number of times. The hype was always far greater then the colective talent.

    But I'll still be shouting the lads on Wednesday, no matter what.

  172. You are not the only one Spit... Rod has been on about that too... then again Rod is an ABE anyway so I guess that doesn't count.

  173. Bo said,

    You are not the only one Spit... Rod has been on about that too... then again Rod is an ABE anyway so I guess that doesn't count.

    Thought the Irish have now learnt the next letter in the alphabet and are now all ABF.

  174. I think most of the fans have commented on the fact that the England squad is far from being world beaters H2... but like yourself, very few would have expected a performance like that shown against Algeria... only an ABE would say it was otherwise.

  175. nah mate... that hand of Henry will be forgotten over time... the hatred of the english will never lessen.

  176. Spit, as has been said, Rod agrees with you.

    Which means you agree with Rod.

    Which means, well, that you and Rod are in agreement.

    I think you can boo whoever the fuck you like. Football exists only because we pay their fucking wages. They work for us. We own them.

    Or some such.

  177. That is something we can agree on Gaz.

  178. Fuck me, I just seen a pig fly passed my window!!

  179. Come on Gaz, I have agreed with you in the past... I think... haven't I?

  180. Spit'
    You're not the only one, Rod said it too.
    I didn't say I'd boo, but I wouldn't begrudge anyone who felt the need to do so.
    Sopporters/fans shouldn't have to just blindly support, they have the right to voice their displeasure if they so choose, to say "stay the F away" if you don't like it, doesn't really solve anything.
    Someone a lot more eloquant then myself wrote the following in regards to this issue;
    " I happen to feel that there is a difference in the bond between supporter and club, and supporter and country.

    I have chosen my club. They are in my heart. I support them because I choose to, not because I have to.

    Watching my country, I demand only one thing. The players, who are supposed to be the best we have to offer, should at the very least give a hundred percent.

    When players who I don’t particularly like, and who play for clubs I do not particularly like, put up a shambolic display like England did last night, then I think they can at least expect, if not thoroughly deserve, to be roundly jeered."

    I'm not saying he's right, nor am I saying that you're wrong. Just think that everyone should be able to voice their opinion.

  181. I dunno Bo. Did you say Arsene was the biggest brainwasher going?

  182. I think had I been at the ground the other night I may have got caught up in the moment and booed.

  183. No Gaz that wasn't me. I think we both agreed on John Terry being a wanker and should have been dropped from the team... that's about the only time though.

  184. You gentlemen are entitled to your opinion if you think booing does sort the problems out.

    Van Nobody (Noone (Plymouth)'s dutch cousine) forces you to support them, specially taking on thousands pounds debt to go see them play.

    Lets face it, most people who can 'afford' to take time off of work and spend, for me at least, considerable amounts of cash are there to have a good time. Tough luck sweetheart, your horse didnt win the course.

    Everyone involved is supposed to be professional i.e. the job can be taken away.

    Not satisfied with the Coach? Fire him.
    Not happy with Rooney's performance? Leave him out of the team.

    The obsession with finding a scapegoat in any and all failures is something I just cant comprehend. Its like the other obsession with eliminating risk. Pointless.

    Sometimes, humans are just not good enough. How hard is it to fathom?

  185. The only thing I would comment on there H2 is you don't have to support your country of birth either... many choose not to... but I see where he is coming from.

  186. "you don't have to support your country of birth either... many choose not to..."

    and get shot after the war, dirty callabarateurs *said in a french accent*

  187. Spit.. it doesn't sort the problem out but it does allow you to let your team know what you think of them. The fans don't have a lot of say in the coach getting fired or the team selection so they express their feelings the only way that is open to them... it was a spontaneous thing ... they were not looking for scapegoats at that time... maybe we here are doing that but not the fans at the game.

  188. yeah but who trusts the french H2... not even the germans... anyway it wasn't just the french that collaborated with the nazi's :)

  189. Spit, there's nothing wrong with "not being good enough".
    Looking like you can't be arsed is what I think upset most.

    Again for the record I'm not really a boo boy, just respect the rights of others to do so.

  190. Anyway... Slovenia are next... anyone game to make a prediction?

  191. Historical FACHKT:

    The french introduced the class system to Britain.

    The first English monarch (First King of England, as opposed to King of the English) was the one to invade Ireland successfully and assume the title of Lord of Ireland was French (born in Le mans, France) was named, as you'll no doubt be very pleased to know, Henry.

    It was unavoidable is what I am trying to say.

  192. I do agree, the booingcontingent have the right to do whatever they want, just like the Vulva blowers.

    england vs. slovenia: Think england will win 2:1

  193. No predictions, no expectations Bo.

    When I got Slovania in Baggie's pool I never dreamed that they would be on top of the league with England having to beat them to qualify.