Saturday, 3 July 2010

Ich bin ein Berliner

Well we can safely say the World Cup has revved into gear now we've got shot of Dommenech's enfants terrible, Lippi's pensioners and Capello's crocks of cack. Four good quarter-finals featuring plenty of grown men in tears - always a sign that things have been right tense.
NB How many England players were reaching for the man-size tissues after the Germany game? (Yeah, yeah, 'course it matters to you, boys).

Of course, the team of the tournament has been Germany. And naturally that means a bunch of lazy, half-baked analysis by the couch potatoes of MotD which has amounted to this:
Hansen: 'Great game-plan...'
Shearer: 'Organised, know their roles...'
Dixon: 'Yeah, what Alan said, erm... and what Alan said.'

They were a stone's throw away from saying 'They were only obeying orders and vorksprung durch technik.'


I am helping you to find your inner German, lads

Fact is the German team has shown more collective flair and dash than the rest of the teams put together. The fourth goal was a thing of beauty and had it been Messi to Tevez to Higuain we'd have been hearing all sorts of bollocks about how your Latin Americans can open tins of luncheon meat with one peg while constructing a matchstick model of the Casa Rosada with the other.

Look, this is the same German team that were only denied last time by a rare bit of devilry upfront from Del Piero and co and got to the final in Euro 2008. There's this idea that we can 'never discount the Germans' because they are deviously pre-programmed for success, when actually they just happen to have some seriously talented players who play well as a team.

The revelation has been Pigsticker (or Pigmounter) who we first saw being a snarling platinum blonde prima donna a few years back - a kind of German Pink minus the talent. This tournament, perhaps freed from the ponderous Barryesque plodder that is Michael Ballack, Schweinsteiger has been pulling the strings like a Prussian Xavi.

The new Schweinsteiger memorial statue

(By the way, since we pronounce that name 'Chavvy', isn't it inevitable that Chelsea will snap him up? Although extending that logic, Spurs and Arsenal will be fighting over Ponce's signature).

Can the Germans lift the trophy? Well Trochowski's a bit Mueller Lite so that might harm their chances but with Klose still defying the logic of club form in a way that might give Michael Owen renewed hope, and Ozil proving to be the best young player in South Africa, well, yes. They can.

Especially in the light of another of them off-key Spanish performances. Why the hell is Del Bosque picking Torres? I'm seriously wondering whether it's Dave Kitson after having found a bottle of Just For Men. His demeanour and movement remind me of Chrissy Waddle during his stint at Sunderland. Or Wayne Rooney in his last four games.

Still the Grattan catalogue coaching team of Germany will be crossing their fingers for Torres to turn up, even if he did terrify them two years ago.

I suppose the main thing is Spain have made it. The ref did right with both pens, although a retaken penalty is one of them sad jokes a ref likes to use just occasionally, like a foul throw, or a custodial sentence for possession of mairijuana. Yes, strictly speaking, it's wrong to encroach into the area at a spot-kick but really... who cares?

Iniesta's nous shone through in the end although clearly there's a rule in world football that if little ghostly Andres goes down, it's always a free kick. The lad's got the Becks knack of winning free-kicks for absolutely bugger-all and cos he's a player I love it's beginning to really rankle.

Of course the Spanish trump card is David 'Don't call me Aston' Villa. The lad's lethal.

Holland will win the other semi-final, no doubt. Beating Brazil was a right turn-up. Felipe Melo treating Robben like a discarded fag-end wasn't. That lads got more screws loose than a disorganised B and Q.

And of course the tie of the round was Uruguay-Ghana. I didn't give a fig about it but what a momentous game.

It will always be remembered for that handball - for which well played, Suarez lad, If that'd been Rooney I'd have been thanking him too (although Wazza displayed the reflexes of a neutered cat coming round from the op so I doubt he'd've got anywhere near it).

Me, I'll remember it not so much for Gyam's miss as the one he took in the penalty shoot-out.

That's a whole continent you've let down there, son.

It didn't stop the poor lad's eyes from gushing like a burst BP pipe after they lost, but crikey for sheer enormity of bollock it's the most admirable thing I've seen on a footy pitch for a while. And not far behind was Abreu's preposterously brave dink to win it for Uruguay.

Somehow the thrill of Wimbers failed to distract me much. Particularly the lasses which unsurprisingly featured a Williams and a megadecibelled Russian shrieker in the final. And a bunch of cowering tennis balls begging not to be hit again by the great clomping Amazons. Can't these harridans pipe down when they're playing? It's tennis not bleeding childbirth.

Brazil were my tip for the title so it's all up for grabs now. And if Germany can keep playing like they are, I hope they win it. Jesus. I never, never thought I'd ever write that sentence.

606 comments:

  1. Maybe winning the war wasn't such a great idea then.

    In other news, if they had have used that cocaine World Cup as the actual trophy do you reckon the England lads would have made a better fist of it?

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  2. gaz yes i think they would have had more of a sniff

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  3. By the way, since we pronounce that name 'Chavvy', isn't it inevitable that Chelsea will snap him up? Although extending that logic, Spurs and Arsenal will be fighting over Ponce's signature

    ---------------------

    lets get it out of the way shall we?

    man utd in for Kuntz?

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  4. "Ich bin ein Berliner"

    A jam doughnut?

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  5. I am a hotdog too, robbo, and also want them to win. its actually hard to see anyone beating them. spain look a bit ramshackle and ive never really forgiven them for the armada and trying to kill my grandad's grandad's grandad's grandad

    Go Germany! Strength through Ozil!

    after the game v argentina i thought 4-1 (4-2 reelly) with half an hour of domination in the middle, started to look a bit mroe respectable from our own Unlikeables.

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  6. morning H - its a jam donut is it? i thought it was a hot dog.

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  7. it has, belatedly, lit up, this wc, but now im more interested in Frances de la Tour and our rooney-on-a-bike mark cavendish.

    cancellera's the favourite as he has a hidden engine on his bike, which he cunningly denies but if we see him doing hill climbs in the alps with his feet on the handlebars ....

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  8. imagine how many goals villa would have scored if they werent playng him out of position on the left wing

    is torres' performance more evidence that we need a winter break?

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  9. As far as I know it's a kind of doughnut Blog.

    And good morning to you too sir, and everyone else while I'm at it.

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  10. Frances de la Tour looked like a right train wreck last night.

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  11. Aunty Beeb definetly need some new "experts", those guys have been well off the mark this tournament, their performance was almost as bad as the national teams.
    They all thought that England would easily beat the Germans. "How mant of their team would get in the England squad" they asked, well none you twats, they're all German (and polish). They also wrote the Dutch off against the Brazilians, they even got Seedorf to tip England as favourites! I wonder how much they had to pay him to say that? The money could of been better spent getting subtitles fot Emanual Adebuywhathefuckdidyasayore.

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  12. I can't be f*cked with the Tour de France, if I wanna see guys in biker shorts on drugs then I'll go to a rave in Amsterdam.

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  13. To be fair H2 the Dutch win was unexpected, even at half-time during the game, though I'm sure welcomed in your neck of the woods. Other than that you're right. I see they've dumped Dunga. Sounds about right really.

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  14. donut, hot dog, im always getting those 2 delicious items of fast food confused, H. i thought id eaten a burger once until i was told id just scoffed a tray of cream cakes.

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  15. you cant beat a dog in the peleton for comedy, zeb

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  16. The Dutch fear noone (plym... nah, never mind) Zeb. THe old Holland would have imploded, but somehow v Marwijk has got 'em ticking well, they're a real team, I just hope he can keep their feet on the ground, over confidence has been a deadly factor for previous Dutch squads.
    v Marwijk is a solid coach and his record speaks for itself. Oranje hasn't lost since he took over.
    -----
    Whipped cream on your hamburger and ketchup and onions on your doughnuts for you then Blogs?
    Just do what Trott does, order a zen hotdog, one with everything.

    ReplyDelete
  17. "Yeovil Town sign Upson"

    I know this is one of those local rag headlines that's there to get your attention but do you think the locals were screaming Nnnooooooooo! when they read it?

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  18. Good blog Robbo! The best thing to have come after the quarters is many of the pundits on beeb have been silenced. They all said it would be All- South American final & have been proved wrong.

    Go Europe!

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  19. Its Holiday on Monday....
    In USA......Reason: Independence Day
    In INDIA....Reason: Independent Indians.

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  20. NNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!


    dont say that!!!

    You proclaimed England will win the World Cup.
    Then you said Brazil will blow everyone away through their 11 Dungas.

    And look what happened.
    And now you tipped Germany.
    See them crash out on Wednesday with Torres bagging a brace.


    Re, the Prima Donas: everyone in Germany was fretting at Löw when he left Kurany and Frings (the recognised prima donas who actually had a far superior domestic season than say Klose).

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  21. There's a WC show on in Australia at the mo (Santo, Sam & Ed's World Cup Fever) which has been fairly enlightening when it comes to the prediction game. Every show Santo, Sam & Ed pick a team they think will progress and wear that team's shirt on the show prior to the games being played.
    Sam has had a very impressive record with his predictions in that every team he has picked has been beaten. I thought it was a fluke, until he wore the Brasilian shirt and next thing, they're out. Last night he gave up on the WC and said he was switching sports and, therefore, wore a team shirt from the Frances de la Tour.
    Low and behold, carnage on the street's of Brussells.

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  22. Fucking Insane Idiot Indian Politicians have called upon "All India Closed" operation to protest against rising food prices, fuel prices and inflation rate.




    Thus depriving the country by few billion rupees for the day.

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  23. Uruguay for the World Cup.

    That would be abolsutely fabulous

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  24. yeah but if you think about it, it means were actually a goal better than argentina...

    I think we'd all settle for that!

    EN-gerrrrrrrrr-laaaannnnnddd!!!

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  25. Haha, all the england flagd ahve now been taken down all over my estate, all apart from teh prick who lives at the bottom... he painted a massive england flag on his wall!!!! what a cock!


    Now he looks like he either supports a shit football team or is a racist!


    Lucky for him he is a racist...

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  26. Holland for the Cup!! Now that's a South African (Suid Afrikaans) cup. How's that for turning the whole of Africa orange.

    To think of it, even the Soccer city chairs are orange. An Omen?

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  27. Lucky for him he is a racist...
    ===============================
    Yup, he's racist. Otherwise he wouldnta painted the whole flag there. But in one way or the other, why don't you all gang up on him and charge him with vandalism or something

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  28. Is council property and the estate is being slowly knocked down and rebuilt over the next 3 years... so they really don't care. Plus he sells a lot of weed which makes him a popular figure in the estate.

    I like it as it highlights to all waht a boob he is... in fact i think a lot of the other wangs from teh estate should have similar "labels" painted on thier outside walls.

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  29. RedBlueArmy92 said...

    Haha, all the england flagd ahve now been taken down all over my estate, all apart from teh prick who lives at the bottom... he painted a massive england flag on his wall!!!! what a cock!


    Now he looks like he either supports a shit football team or is a racist!


    Lucky for him he is a racist...

    -------------------------

    Only a flag RBA? There's a pub near where I live where some clever bod did this painting of a window and a couple of chaps in England shirts with pints in hand on the back wall of the place a few years ago ... that pub closed down a year ago.

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  30. Morning all.

    Shattered today, had to do the long drive from SW19 to home last night after the tennis. Got in at 3am. Fucked!!!

    I may not be saying much today, as Im trying to sleep in the office.........

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  31. You didn't get enough sleep at wimbers???




    hahaha, i mocked tennis!

    (i never watched i assume nadal won in straight sets???)

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  32. it looks like its the Dutch who are going to win it, it will be interesting if its a Dutch-German final....with the Germans playing like the Dutch of yore and vice versa...a reversal of 74

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  33. You would assume correctly RBA and no, didnt get sleep, had a couple beers during the match instead!! Hehe! Not sure if that helped or hindered my driving though....

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  34. So Uruguay to beat the Dutch and ze Germans to beat Espana. Anyone got the latest odds?

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  35. So I am tired, I make an effort on here and everyone fucks off? A trend? No, probably not!!

    Well Fuck it!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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  36. will sleeping actually make any difference to how you council worker types do your job anyway

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  37. No not really adam. I'm that good, I can do my job while sleeping!!

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  38. Or maybe, my job is that good I can do it sleeping?? Aherm...

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  39. Uraguay to win the world cup on penalties against ze germans, blogs imaginary drug addicted phsycic vampire cat nostrafarudamus told me so...

    safe as houses!

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  40. go to the BBC fottball main page and have a look at the pictures for teh link to teh story "Emotional Caoches count the cost".... It looks massivley like Maradona and Dunga are about to kiss each other....

    Chuckles!

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  41. is true Ngog... either way funny!

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  42. World-class scribing Robbo, at least someone from these shores brought their A-game to the WC. Unfettered by the BBC you are our gain. Wit, humility and just the right amount of fervour and bad language. And yes, I agree, the Germans are like surgeons, you have to admire their work. Looking forward to your last-four pronouncements.

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  43. Absolutely RBA.

    On another note, I didn't realise he was still working?


    Italy's 2006 World Cup-winning captain Fabio Cannavaro will join new Al Ahli coach David O'Leary in Dubai after signing a two-year deal with the club.
    Full Story: Daily Mail



    Cannavaro that is.......

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  44. Tottenham striker Jermain Defoe says the simple excuse for England's poor showing at the World Cup was that boss Fabio Capello was "unlucky".
    Full story: the Sun
    ----

    Indeed, unlucky to have such a bunch of no-marks.

    Mawning Y'awl

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  45. Monday morning SNH5 to you Hman... all good in the holland i hope?

    Wicked blud!

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  46. David O'leary still alive? hmmmm....... now he's gon run down the Al Alhi (All Oil) to the ground. . . . . .
    Watch this space

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  47. Yeah bro, Straight back at ya SNH5, Dungheap's closed today, so I'll be off out for a bit, gonna check out Alkmaar (home of AZ). Then get ready for tomorrows semi finals...... better take it easy on the beer tonight. (probably won't though)

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  48. "It's tennis not bleeding childbirth."
    ================================
    Wow Robbo, I know how to play Tennis, but how do you play childbirth ;)

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  49. O'Leary - Dubai. Flashy structures built on sand. How perfect a fit do you want?

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  50. The Tribal Monk - ask Cristiano Ronaldo.

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  51. apparently, ronaldo's child was a virgin birth via his ear-hole

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  52. rba- my psychic cat has mind melded with teh german octopus and is behaving oddly but informs me of the follwoing :

    1. germany will win the WC,
    2. jurgen klinsman will replace capello as england manager
    3. i quote : "miaoww, the inevitable triumph of the German worldspirt or "NationalElf" over the impoverished Englsih "National Health" will result in the supreme and necessary end of the development of historical Being in the realisation of the truth of German self-certainty, pur pur"
    4. something about the rhineland and poland

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  53. Does "she wants to remain anonymous" mean I've paid her squillions of pounds to dissappear and never speak to the media so stuff you tabloid hacks?

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  54. The Tees Mouth said...
    The Tribal Monk - ask Cristiano Ronaldo.
    =======================================
    Can I trust him? He can't even reveal his child's mother. It's usually the other way round because of things like DNA proving and stuff like that. But not revealing the mum's ID only makes the press pry more i fink.......

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  55. Ohh fuck, its a boring Monday.

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  56. I don't think that there is a mother. Such a preening egotist probably produced a child by making love to himself. Now I've made myself ill, I'm off to the Bell for something to straighten me out a bit. Laters.

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  57. SS11 said...
    Ohh fuck, its a boring Monday.
    ------------------

    bit like a Stoke vs Bolton match then

    ReplyDelete
  58. Bolton play attractive football under Owen Coyle.
    Anyways, its boring because I have nothing to do at home and the strike in India is on for another 2 hours or so.

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  59. 4. something about the rhineland and poland
    ===========================================
    Talking of the Rhine and Polska? Ever noticed how the Germans wanna go at world domination once again, Hitler style, or even more? I mean they've got a Ghanaian, 1 or 2 Turks, a few Polishes, A Nigerian, a Serbian or 2, Bosnian, A Spanish, a Tunisian, a Brazillian, maybe an American, and possibly an Englishman there as well.......... Why don't we?

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  60. A wife called up his husband after receiving the First Class grade in B.Ed degree.

    Upon hearing, an excited husband sms'ed his Father-in-Law "Your daughter is first class in Bed"

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  61. Not sure that this is an improvement on Steve Tilson

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  62. Southend United have appointed former Plymouth boss Paul Sturrock as their new manager on a three-year contract.

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  63. Excellent blog robbo, my fav read for a while actually.

    RE: the photo of the beer drinkers - all i can say on that is NICELY PRESENTED!

    The comment on the photo of the lad crying had me laughing out loud and getting strange looks across the office.

    I agree about the pundits, but i would throw in the commentators as well. Lawro sounds like he really doesnt want to be there half the time. Miserable sod.

    At least motty is being phased out. I used to love his commentary when i was a kid, but he started making far too many mistakes and like other established commentators started thinking his opinion on everything was what everyone wanted to hear rather than just describing the action. I would also like the co-commentators to be guys who have either played or managed in the last throws of the world cup.

    Still the beeb arent as bad as ITV. Sorry Robbo/FBH but Gareth Southgate offering an opinion on tactics of world cup managers doesnt sit right especially after what he did with boro. Same for Keegan. Then you have Clive Tyldsely........

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  64. nice blog robbo
    for me klose defies all logic, never been impressed with him, not very fast technical or a great passer but somehow he keeps scoring,respect for that
    the germans have been playing the best but i hope holland wins it even if theyre play has been bad , van persie must have something on van marwijk, 4 bad games and still playing
    must be a feyenoord thing:P

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  65. Yeah, I HATE it when that happens Ngog!

    Meanwhile...

    H2H - is THIS the Dungheap in a pre-H2H incarnation?

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  66. You seem very HATEful today Gaz? Anything on your mind? You get out of bed the wrong side? Or are you still in bed? Lazy get!!

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  67. You just can't make these names or headlines up. I mean "GAY PIPPED BY DIX"

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  68. Sorry here is the link........

    http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/athletics/8786133.stm

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  69. Why Did You Ngog Rafa said...
    You just can't make these names or headlines up. I mean "GAY PIPPED BY DIX"

    -----------------------

    ha ha, i saw that Ngog.

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  70. Pipped?

    Is that some sort of new position?

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  71. lets talk about united......that should draw em back out.

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  72. So apparently the BBC are still allowing some humour on the sports website.

    Well they still do have Garth Crooks too, don't they? And everyone laughs at him.

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  73. Yes SGP...

    UNITED are absolute certainties to win the Prem next year, along with the Cups and The CL.

    They will score 3000 goals.

    2000 of these will be scored by a resurgent Wayne Rooney who will say "At last I'm playing with people who know how to pass the ball."

    Another 2999 of the goals will be evenly distributed around the rest of the team with the exception of the last one.

    Which will be score by Berbatov by way of a tap in as the last goal in a 167-0 rout of bottom club Liverpool

    ReplyDelete
  74. Oh yes, and in other lower league news (the lower here means they are lower life forms, you know like bacteria or summat)...


    Aldershot FC will cease to exist after the town of Aldershot is declared a no go area by the World Health Organisation.

    and...

    Port Vale will play in front of an average attendance of 2 for every match.

    (Their normal 1 fan no longer has access to a carer for his twin brother because of Tory budget cuts so has to bring him along)

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  75. i love supporting united, despite living nowhere near manchester.

    its the fans of the small clubs that i dont like. What is the point of these clubs. They should all be closed.

    I will always change any conversation that other people are having, to talk about united.

    ReplyDelete
  76. louis soares is sleeping with the port vale captains mum.

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  77. paul scholes has a bigger penis than me.

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  78. No comment's because you were Ngogne for a while...... Now that you're here, the comments wont Ngog

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  79. shit....didnt mean to post the one about louis soares.

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  80. Fucking Hell, I leave for 5 minutes and arrive back to a United fest!!! Get in there!

    United for the treble anyone? Well, once Benzema, Cahill and Joe Cole sign.

    ReplyDelete
  81. Monk, I better not ngog for while incase I miss something.

    Its all ngoging to kick off soon I'm sure!!

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  82. its a united themed afternoon, ngog. We are going to walk it this year.......

    ReplyDelete
  83. It was the 4th of July yesterday


    Which was invented to honour United

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  84. I don't think so......... The kids at Arsenal will be close enough this season..... Ahh, forget it

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  85. it was when we invented america, gaz.

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  86. Louis Soares is sleeping with everyones mum, except his own... (i hope?)

    GAz Aldershot FC stopped being a club in 1991, then Aldershot Town FC were formed... the town is a no go area though... but thats hardly news is it?

    ReplyDelete
  87. Is that true RBA?.....i had better just send my mum a text to check….

    ReplyDelete
  88. she says she cant talk right now......

    ReplyDelete
  89. thats a weird text from her....it says she is in pre-season training, LOL.

    What does LOL mean

    ReplyDelete
  90. ScholesTheGingerPrince said...
    it was when we invented america, gaz.
    ==========================================
    It was when you invented the Glazier family Prince

    ReplyDelete
  91. GazUtd said...
    LOL = Lovin Our Louis

    --------------------

    Walsh?....jeez you irish look after your own dont you?

    ReplyDelete
  92. Gaz, that FACKT about United Scoring 3000 goals next year is crap ... we all know your top scorer is going to be Own, followed by the Dodgy Ref because SAF has the sum total of 18p to spend on transfers while the Glaziers go on a multi squillion pound family piss up and charge it to the company account. :P

    ReplyDelete
  93. By the way, what is this 6 Music that my licence fees have not been used to save?

    If only JDR was here to explain.

    ReplyDelete
  94. SGP - ABSOLUTELY NOT!

    There is no way Louis Walsh would sleep with your mum.



    Your dad now, that's a different story.

    Allegedly.

    ReplyDelete
  95. So if SAF has no money to spend next year how is he going to bribe the referees?

    ReplyDelete
  96. GazUtd said...
    SGP - ABSOLUTELY NOT!

    There is no way Louis Walsh would sleep with your mum.


    Your dad now, that's a different story.

    Allegedly.

    ---------------

    im assured there is a perfectly reasonable explanation that covers all of that.

    ReplyDelete
  97. No need to bribe!! They're scared of SAF

    ReplyDelete
  98. apparently louis walsh used the force on my dad....

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  99. I'm pretty sure it was his lightsabre SGP

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  100. World Cup isnt over yet and Club Football fever's already on. Great going guys!

    ReplyDelete
  101. SAF just needs an extra breakhorsepower on the hairdryer then he'll be ready to go................

    ReplyDelete
  102. Why is Man United scoring only 3000 goals?

    I think 1000 of them have already been scored.
    Who's Berbatov... is he still playing for United this season?

    Jokes aside, SAF should partner Macheda with Rooney this season

    ReplyDelete
  103. Did Louis Walsh have the X faxtor then Scholesy?

    ReplyDelete
  104. GazUtd said...

    Port Vale will play in front of an average attendance of 2 for every match.
    ----------

    you're so filled with hate, gaz

    ReplyDelete
  105. 5 July 2010 15:47
    Why Did You Ngog Rafa said...
    Did Louis Walsh have the X faxtor then Scholesy?

    --------------------

    for me, im afraid its a no

    ReplyDelete
  106. 5 July 2010 14:45
    ScholesTheGingerPrince said...
    paul scholes has a bigger penis than me.

    ------

    yes and he's hung like a baby carrot

    ReplyDelete
  107. ScholesTheGingerPrince said...
    louis soares is sleeping with the port vale captains mum.

    -----------------

    scholsy, have you ANY idea who the Port vale captain is? or rather who his grandad

    we may not be right good

    we may not be right hard

    but our captains grandad is fookin bullets! so a little more respect form you jolly manure tossers, please

    ReplyDelete
  108. i tip man u to narrowly escape relegation

    ReplyDelete
  109. In a cunning plan Fergie is going to buy Heskey in the summer to partner Rooney.

    It will baffle and confuse managers and defenses alike and while they stand scratching their heads United will score freely. Unlike Heskey.

    ReplyDelete
  110. Gaz, why get Heskey? We already have Owen and Berbatov?

    ReplyDelete
  111. Although to be honest I still rate Berbatov even though he has been poor since he signed for us.

    ReplyDelete
  112. We are getting Heskey purely to deflect the attention from all the Berbatov haters.

    That and as Heskey played in a World Cup for England he must be freakin brilliant.

    Although I don't know where we are getting the 47 million to pay for him.

    ReplyDelete
  113. blogdignag said...
    GazUtd said...

    Port Vale will play in front of an average attendance of 2 for every match.
    ----------

    you're so filled with hate, gaz

    _________


    Unlike Port Vale's ground.


    Which is filled with pottery and some delightful flower arrangements!





    (Seriously though I laughed extremely hard at your retort)

    ReplyDelete
  114. blogdignag said...
    5 July 2010 14:45
    ScholesTheGingerPrince said...
    paul scholes has a bigger penis than me.

    ------

    yes and he's hung like a baby carrot

    -------------------------------

    bloggy, how DARE you.......im off.....wait....its true.....DAMN...fair play, forget all that.

    ReplyDelete
  115. port vale captain is a certain mr phil "the power" taylor. Next question?

    ReplyDelete
  116. Thats because Im Alfie Noakes, gaz, and Ive got stories from the North.

    I'm Alfie Noakes.

    No, I'm Alfie Noakes.

    No. I'm Alfie Noakes.

    No, I'm Alfie Noakes.

    ReplyDelete
  117. Was he John Noakes brother who kidnapped and tortured Shep when John wouldn't let him sleep with his wife?

    ReplyDelete
  118. oh dear. scholesy. youre for it now.

    draft 1 of Hate Mail:

    Dear Mr "Mad" Frankie Fraser

    theres this guy, yeah, calls hismelf scholsy's even smaller penised pal, like, and he says, right, he says youre a puff....

    ReplyDelete
  119. john wouldnt let him sleep with shep, gaz, get it right

    ReplyDelete
  120. i believe frankie has calmed down a lot in his later years.

    He is known as Slightly Miffed Frankie Fraser now.

    ReplyDelete
  121. ScholesTheGingerPrince said...
    i believe frankie has calmed down a lot in his later years.

    He is known as Slightly Miffed Frankie Fraser now.

    =====================

    Is that since Louis Walsh "sorted him out"?

    ReplyDelete
  122. HATE FILLED BLOG


    http://aldershotwoes.blogspot.com/2010/07/getaway.html

    ReplyDelete
  123. he's going to me Raving Berserker Slavering Maniac Frankie Fraser when I tell him you said that

    ReplyDelete
  124. Why write a blog about Hatfield RBA?

    ReplyDelete
  125. ngog worries ngog... its really just the word hate repeated over and over again thousands of time, and teh copy and poaste function don't work on my laptop so its genuine hate...

    Still not a patch on Gazs level of hatred, but i do my best,..

    ReplyDelete
  126. yeah copy and poaste... its new from Windows, you can see a video about it which shows you a c*nt in 8 seconds.

    ReplyDelete
  127. His and Hers Diary page one, Saturday.

    HERS:
    He was quiet, subdued, just not himself. Something was wrong. He hasn't kissed me all night. Not even looked in my direction. I think's its another woman. I went to bed and cried. He followed me up later. I cuddled up to him and stroked his hair. he lay still. Eventually we made love and fell asleep in each others arms.

    HIS:
    England lost. Fucking gutted. Got a shag though.

    ReplyDelete
  128. Chelsea to have a big blow out...

    http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/world/us_and_canada/10507054.stm

    ReplyDelete
  129. Peter invites his mum over for tea. She notices his flat mate Joe is slightly camp & although she suspected Peter was gay he denies that anything is going on & says that they are only flat mates.
    A week later Joe says to Peter "Ever since your mum came over for tea I cant find the frying pan".
    Peter emails his mum and says "Dear mum, I'm not saying that you DID take the frying pan & I'm not saying you DIDN'T take the frying pan, but it's been missing ever since you came for tea. Love Peter".
    His mum replies "Dear son, I'm not saying you DO sleep with Joe & I'm not saying you DON'T sleep with Joe, but, if he was sleeping in his own bed he would have found the frying pan by now you little bent bastard!! Love mum".

    ReplyDelete
  130. 10 minutes, no one posts anything...

    dont worry i get the hint, i would HATE to be where i am not wanted...

    I'm going to go talk to my self on the beeb site...

    good day sir!

    ReplyDelete
  131. I was usining reverse fergy time Ngog...

    ReplyDelete
  132. or double reverse fergy time, the laws of physics get pretty confusing this late in the day..

    ReplyDelete
  133. giefer, in it???

    Anyway i hear that the dark sith lord ferguson is now so powerful he has given up signing payers and is signing the elements of nature, wind up front, with earth in defence. Given his ability to bend time and control the world around him, i definately expect a top four finish.

    ReplyDelete
  134. So its bigging up time for ManU,already?

    Theres some good football still to watch in SA

    ReplyDelete
  135. well ten minutes beofre i go, so i'd better shamelessly promote my latest thinkgas...

    http://aldershotwoes.blogspot.com/2010/07/getaway.html

    ReplyDelete
  136. ...........And

    all BBC columnists and punidits are crap

    How STGP didnt get modded over there and I did?

    ReplyDelete
  137. Oi oi tone... hows them millers looking? Any decent pre season??? (we have Watford... thats it, worst for years!)

    anyway,

    http://aldershotwoes.blogspot.com/2010/07/getaway.html

    ReplyDelete
  138. tone..it was a bit darn quiet here, so we had to do something to get it going.

    ReplyDelete
  139. Hang all BBC pundits... what even Lawro!?


    Thats is a step to far sir...

    ReplyDelete
  140. My blog is being considered by the beeb at the moment... so that tells you the level of guff they go for... best thing you ever did was leave them robbo, even though the blog has allegedly changed, but thats mainly just Gaz and his gutter mouth hatred. (i should stop this running joke, as gaz is genuinly brilliant, but i wont)

    GAZ... Dont hate the player... hate the game!

    http://aldershotwoes.blogspot.com/2010/07/getaway.html

    ReplyDelete
  141. STGP
    I dont suppose Bevan will follow it up, tho it says another interview with JK is on the way.
    Arse creeper, looks it as well
    I think I'll wait till the end before giving them grades tho a few 0's might be awarded, maybe not PF and TV

    ReplyDelete
  142. tone, i thought i was gonna get modded in 5 mins...weird.

    had to get it off my chest...dont feel that much better for it though.

    ReplyDelete
  143. http://aldershotwoes.blogspot.com/2010/07/getaway.html

    http://aldershotwoes.blogspot.com/2010/07/getaway.html

    http://aldershotwoes.blogspot.com/2010/07/getaway.html

    only one os my blog, the other bring certain death to a stranger....

    click wiseley...







    bye you lot.

    ReplyDelete
  144. RBA
    We seem to signing up Div 2 cast offs, cos we got no money

    I see the Shots are upto 2nd already?

    ReplyDelete
  145. STGP
    I didnt think "claptrap" was profanity, OK talking or witing bollocks was

    ReplyDelete
  146. http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/bbcthree/2010/07/special-1-tv-episode-5-what-next.shtml


    LOLOLOLOL

    SHUT UP FIFA!!

    ReplyDelete
  147. Tone,

    I agree mate, if they have a comments section, they should bloody respond to them now and then.

    bunch of arse.

    ReplyDelete
  148. WTF - an IOU love in this aftie eh!!!!

    And Kris Boyd signs for Boro!!!! THe future is bright - the future is Scottish!!!!

    Robbo - nice pic - and yes I would - cant see it tho!!??

    ReplyDelete
  149. Gaz
    Excellent piss take from the Special 1

    btw SGE denies talks with Fulham, maybe they dont fucking want him

    ReplyDelete
  150. FBH
    when the foreign rule comes in Boro 'll be fucked

    ReplyDelete
  151. English speaking tone - English Speaking - its coalition policy :)

    ReplyDelete
  152. Most Germans speak english, anyone takes your fancy?
    We have a coalition here as well

    ReplyDelete
  153. The interview which Chris Bevan took with Klinsmann is up on the beeb. Insightful.

    Whatever he's said is true for any club/country.

    ReplyDelete
  154. The philosophy was installed in Bundesliga system 6 yrs back. It took 6 years for Germany to produce results on the world stage.

    Wenger adopted youth policy 6 years ago for Arsenal Club. So, does that warranty results this season's PL?

    If it does, co-incidence!

    ReplyDelete
  155. Der-Kaiser "Beckenbauer" says Spain will win against Germany. This is what he had to say - "There is something about destiny in it but, above all, after games against Honduras, Chile and Paraguay, there will be the relief of playing against a European side, a side they KNOW they can beat.
    Viva Espana."

    ReplyDelete
  156. Just watched the Top Gear Episode from last night.

    Wange Wover.
    Classic.

    ReplyDelete
  157. Any more Top Gear watching and you'll be banned, sir.

    ReplyDelete
  158. The problem for England, comparing it to the JK interview, is that there is too much money in the EPL, but the FA doesnt have any balls to do anything about it.

    Sorry for you lovers of the big clubs, but the EPL needs taking down a peg or 2, and SKY needs to realise they are part of the problem

    ReplyDelete
  159. Spit
    The interview between Campbell and Clarkson was spicy.

    Oh sorry Robbo!!!!!!!1

    ReplyDelete
  160. The Tees Mouth said...

    Any more Top Gear watching and you'll be banned, sir.

    ------------------

    Oh crap ... I'd best pack my belongings then ...

    ReplyDelete
  161. ... Mind I'm kicking myself as it is having seen what good nick Jezza's Ford was in ... I'm really starting to wish I'd kept out 20 year old Escort now.

    ReplyDelete
  162. This is the time of the night when I really fancy a fag!!! But Im not having one - they are the vilest things ever!!

    ReplyDelete
  163. Good for you to stick to your guns FBH, don't even think about it. In no time you'd be cig free

    ReplyDelete
  164. fbh,

    I am having one right now.

    Sorry.

    ReplyDelete
  165. Robbo, what you got against TopGear?

    Sure they have emasculated the show but its still one of Beeb's better money pits.

    ReplyDelete
  166. Also,

    Spain to win 3:1

    Fabregas to play just behind Villa up front.

    Nationalelf to be given a warm welcome.
    8 straight semifinals, they bloody deserve it.

    And for one I thought, I might experience how it feels like to be livin' in a country that becomes world champion.

    ReplyDelete
  167. tone, i agree with you. I think the sooner the premiership is clamped down, the better. The american draft system wouldnt necessarily work in english football, but anything that spreads around the chances of winning is good for me.

    ReplyDelete
  168. Robbo doesnt like top gear! Jeez, how did you choose to buy your range rover then?

    ReplyDelete
  169. STGP,

    slightly missing the point, in my humble opinion.

    JUst look at the Spanish model. Real and Barca earn 10 times more than the bottom clubs in la Liga. It doesnt seem to hurt the talent development for Spanish football does it?

    The FA has a simple job to do. Get coaches trained properly so they could in turn, train the young kids properly. It wont happen overnight, but within a decade, the results will be there.

    Do you think the big clubs would still buy foreign if there were 3 young, local boys fighting it over any one position that opens up?

    Can we as a nation, for once be patient and build something long term instead of being a bunch of reactionaries looking for scapegoats?

    Please.

    ReplyDelete
  170. ScholesTheGingerPrince said...

    Robbo doesnt like top gear! Jeez, how did you choose to buy your range rover then?
    ____________

    or go to holiday in Italy and Dubai?

    Its jealousy, is what it is.

    ReplyDelete
  171. Ofcourse the club debt problem is something completely different altogehter and a threat to the game at a different level.

    Sooner some stricter laws regarding club ownership come into place the batter.

    Here they could copy the German Model (they cant copy everything and not everything the Germans do is the best) whereby the fans own 50%+1 of the club and the club debt is not allowed to be higher than a certain percentage of the club turnout.

    Result is cheaper tickets, higher attendances but also mean, the german clubs cannot spend mega bucks on foreign signings thus forcing them to buy local (be it german or foreign kids coming through their academies).

    ReplyDelete
  172. Now that I have had teh misfortune to read my own posts, I thhoink its safe to ascertain, I shall sleep.

    Nite all.

    Remember, keep away from kids. They are evil.

    ReplyDelete
  173. spit, you have much better things to do than look back on comments i have made here mate, but i know they are not related. I have bored many with my views about sorting it at kids level. I was just making the point that the premiership would be better if the chance of winning was spread about a bit. Thats not to say i remember a time when it was even. As long as i have followed football it has been dominated by a small amount of clubs. The clubs change, but decades are normally "controlled" by 3 or 4 clubs tops.

    About 6 years ago i had my stag do in madrid. As part of the trip we played a game against a local teenage boys team (it was supposed to be unfit expats), anyway, while we were waiting for everyone to arrive we watched an older guy crossing the ball from the right wing for a lad who i would place at about 8 or 9, who was chesting it and volleying it high in to the net from the edge of the penalty area. He was so good, it was rare for him to miss. Awesome.

    sorry for rambling

    ReplyDelete
  174. ha ha my inane ramblings meant i missed you! serves me right for waffling.

    ReplyDelete
  175. i agree its got to be thought out rather than just throw money at it.

    Trevor Brooking has been director of football development or something for 7 years. Whilst i am not expecting results right now, wouldnt it be nice for an update on what he has done.

    There is a view that his ideas have been blocked by the money men at the FA, well surely he is man enough to put principle over money. After all that is part of the job isnt it?

    ReplyDelete
  176. Fucking KFC beside me house shut down. What the fuck!! I'm gonna have to learn to cook. Any tips?

    ReplyDelete