Tuesday, 14 April 2015

Manuel Labouring

So another filthily rich football club prepares to ditch a nice man coz the players can't really be arsed. Manuel Pellegrini wears a haunted look these days, and given that at the best of times the Chilean appears to have just stepped off the world's most terrifying ghost train, that's saying something.

Of course for those of us who observe from a distance, like inquisitive paupers in Downton Abbey, there's a certain delight in watching the wealthy fall. Self serving millionaires tend to get a little bored and complacent at times. Even Bill Gates must have a day off but unlike say Yaya Toure that tends not to coincide with a need to up your workrate to avoid being overrun in midfield.

As  Citeh's form goes up and down its easy to blame Yaya for the yoyo. He's a paradox, that lad, a combination of grace and fatigue. One moment he's powering through opposition like an American through pizza, the next moment he looks he's moving through glue.

But it's not all him. Joe Hart's done well since definitively holding off the man with the Mexican porn name Willy Caballero, and you can never fault Zabaleta for effort. Aguero will never be less than a brilliant forward but when your best player this year has been James Milner you've got to ask yourself what's going wrong.

There's no doubt Vincent Kompany has been astonishingly shit. Watching him flail around like a plastic bag in a jacuzzi has been as shocking in its way as seeing Ian Poulter in grey slacks or hearing Robbie Savage successfully arrive at the end of a sentence.

His direness is not down to lethargy unlike say the mercenary ex-Arsenal brigade. Of course the solution will be a managerial change rather than ditching the lax and lazy. FIFA fair play rules haven't helped but even then they've forked out a fortune on Mangala, a defender who makes Phil Jones look assured, and Bony who has merely become the latest in a long line of Etihad bench decoration.

Were it not for the eminent graciousness of the manager I'd be chuckling like the mean-spirited sod I've always been. Still maybe management of a ruthless organisation is too rough a post for such a bloke. If I were him I'd take the money and set up a nice over 50s five a side league in Santiago and never look back.

Lest we forget mind you we are talking of the Premier League champions, the team that robbed us of a lovely sentimental story last season when they pipped Liverpool. This season there's less romance riding on the Kop's achievements so people (and the press) are more able to focus on the misdemeanours of the misfiring Reds.

Perhaps Kevin Pietersen 's every move will be monitored more closely than Raheem Sterling. But I doubt it. The lad may be less bouffant this season but his head's much further above the parapet. His agent is clearly unconcerned about the boy's wellbeing and is fuelling his client's agitation for a move to somewhere like Madrid.

"STERLING TO EUROPE" There's a headline that will confuse Ukip voters.

But all the kid's done so far is turn down a lot of money and taken laughing gas, neither of which are that unusual amongst rich young men right now. Indeed if Sterling was, say, a successful stockbroker we'd all be expecting this rampant self-interest. After all it's what the Conservative party manifesto is all about.

While we're on the subject can I just remind people that Inheritance Tax does NOT mean that you pay tax on your money twice. You pay tax on it once. Then you die. Your children then pay tax on it (and even then that's only when it gets above a very healthy amount). It's called redistribution and it's perfectly reasonable. Sorry children of the reasonably well off you'll just have to pay the same sordid tax-dodge shysters to help you avoid that one too.

Where was I? Ah yes, Raheem. Yes he's greedy. It's how this country works right now. But for God's sake can we stop this scuzzy snooping when people are simply having a bit of a legal laugh. The odd ciggie or even spliff isn't the end of the fecking world.

Listen if Sterling is burning off defenders inter 2016 Euros and getting England the odd victory he can Robbie-Fowler up the touch line for all I care.





35 comments:

  1. It all looked so factually accurate until the last sentence Robbo.

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  2. "It's called redistribution and it's perfectly reasonable."
    It's always perfectly reasonable when other people's money is being taken. Ugh.

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  3. Inheritance tax is the one tax that should be removed. (And no I am not from a family anywhere near rich enough to have to pay it)

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  4. Inheritance tax is the only tax we currently have on wealth rather than income - the wealthy pay nothing and letting them off that hook would be a disgrace. More wealth taxes, not less - promote social mobility, not the bullingdon club approved status quo.

    And dear god, let the next man city manager be somebody it's easy to hate.

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  5. Yep - it's a rich man's money, so it's OK to steal it. They paid their taxes on it and they should be able to do whatever they want with the remainder. If your argument is that we should have a more progressive tax system, then I'm on your side, but stop trying to justify governmental theft.

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  6. Progressive taxation is clearly a good thing. But only income is currently taxed - a progressive tax system that works with income and wealth would be more equitable. It is possible to have significant wealth and little income, thereby paying very little tax. Also, income is generally meritorious, wealth is often not.

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  7. Byron Shorttrouser14 April 2015 at 17:03

    Clearly Anonymous is a raging schizophrenic.

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  8. Will people please stop naming their kids Anonymous? It's getting rather confusing.

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  9. Fuck off with your politics of greed, you boring Anonymous cunt - not you, Anonymous, I mean you, Anonymous which is probably how your Swiss bank account is registered. All wealth is generated by the community, and that's where it ultimately belongs. Look what you've made me do, I only came here to post a nob gag but I'd rather have a sister in a brothel than a brother in three Tory party (although ironically I have two brothers in a brothel and two sisters in the Tory party, its a funny old world)

    Back in the real world, its been odd watching the vicissitudes of the Manchester zeitgeist, as united lose out to city who lose out to united and such its the intensity of the rivalry that behind their backs they've both lost out to Chelsea who have the best manager and the richest owner in the world and almost despite Wenger (I'm thinking of coquelin's accidental ruse to prominence), Arsenal. You never know, when the rouble collapses, arsenal might actually end up winning it, round about 2050, just before the Revolution which brings power to the proletariat and port vale to global pre eminence.

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    1. "Fuck off with your politics of greed"
      Says the guy who wants to tax corpses twice.

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  10. Manchester united pay no corporation tax due to they're artificially arranged debt and will pay no capital gains when they are sold because they are registered in the Cayman Islands, and that's not even a joke.

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  11. Hi kids.

    Yep, I'm still alive, been busy with a relocation over the last few blogs, so haven't been around much. Sold all the bars, got myself to the gym, lost 25 kilos and moved back to an urban area in South Holland, was sick of the rural life and all the tedious chats about poultry and sheep, I'm not bleedin Welsh ffs.

    Any roader, good to see you back Robbo, aparently just in time to jinx the Boro, which probably means that Arsenal will slump from now on too, it's not like we were gonna win the league anyway, but finnishing above 4th would be like a trophy (Arsene speak that)....... But I've probably jinxed that too now.

    Hope you are all well.

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  12. Good to see Robbo and H2 back.

    I must be the worst predictor at Robbo's. My latest prediction, earlier in the season, that Arsenal would finish outside of the top four seems headed for the shit house. Not that I mind being proven wrong (again) with this one.

    I haven't been able to watch most of the games this season so I don't know if we are playing well or some of the other teams are playing shit. The couple of games I have managed to watch, we happened to scramble the three points without looking at all impressive. Anyway, the main thing is we are above Un**ed and if we finish above them come the end of the season I shall be happy.

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  13. 'Salright, Bo, I tipped Citeh to repeat as league champs. Then again, I might have phrased it that it was "City's to lose," and lost it they most emphatically have.

    H2H says he's been relocating, but I think the real reason is no one has closed the comments of the last few blogs with, "New blog up, H." Glad you're well, H!

    Robbo seems to have pissed off the Anonymous collective as well. To quote the great Dennis Moore, "Blimey! This redistribution of wealth is trickier than I thought..."

    As for "like an American through pizza," I resemble that remark...

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  14. "man with the Mexican porn name Willy Caballero"
    Reading your blog just made my day Robbo!!!

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  15. Jeez, I turn my back for 5 minutes and I miss not 1 blog but 2! Looks like history repeating itself - Mancini: Title one year sack the next ditto Sam the Chilean Eagle so it looks like the players are saying, "We've done our bit now we'll sit back and take the money. Champions League? Too much like hard work - and too much travelling!" On that basis, Sterling looks a good fit (apart from the actually winning anything bit!)

    Spider

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  16. Inheritance tax.Here's an interesting thought (not that any party would propose it,as it's a massive vote loser unless you have elderly parents in respite care) A 40% tax on all inheritance over £10,000 would pay for the health care of every single elderly person in this country.No more swallowing up of savings,selling houses or any other major headache to worry about when your mother/father has dementia and requires 24 hour care.

    Being self employed I have insurance policies left,right and centre.I'm worth a fortune dead (which is why I sleep with one eye open) I'm worth bugger all alive,but hey ho.So if my children are given a six figure sum each,which they have not had to put one second of effort into earning ( I don't mean that in a derogatory way about the girls btw,I'm sure you know what I mean) but they have to pay 40% tax on it they still get a nice big bundle of cash for free and haven't had to sell my house etc etc to pay for my health care.It's the perfect bill for me as I pay it when I'm dead.

    However,as I'm like prawns in rose-marie sauce (on a roll),the current Labour Party need to look beyond the end of their noses and look at how to create wealth in this country,not just redistribute it.It's very easy to say tax the rich,mansion tax etc etc but they require business to make money to raise tax revenue from them.A market controlled economy may not be perfect and requires a touch more regulation than we've seen from the Thatcher/Major/Blair/Brown Governments,but Beaker wants a state controlled economy.That really doesn't work at all.

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    1. Yes the debate is about the role of the state, how big it should be - Tories want it yoda sized, except without the special powers, Labour are portrayed as wanting to be the Emperor in a state of Death Star magnitude. Looking at their spending plans and deficit reduction calculations, I don't think that's true. I agree with you Jack, the public/private sector need like the Force to be carefully balanced, they are symbiotic with the private sector like the Midichlorians channelling the energy of the public sector universe. All I know is I wish tories were mythical greed-worms in a galaxy far far away.

      ANyone seen the the star wars trailer?

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  17. Meanwhile,back to the football world.Big game for my brave lads on Saturday.Away at Wolves.If we can avoid defeat them just maybe I can look forward to being knocked out of the playoffs by Norwich.

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  18. I wouldn't apply for a pundit's job anywhere Jack, you'd have no chance, you make too much bloody sense.

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  19. SO Chelsea the most abused club on social media? How can that be true? SUch a charming, likable little club, he not that much of a Bond villain, old Roman, and john terry he's only screwed a few of his friends wives.....the only hint of charm vaguely related to that exogorth of a club is our own hellsbluesbells. Hi Bells!

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  20. Pep to manc according to schoelsy which means they'll be spending big >>>

    http://www.independent.co.uk/sport/football/news-and-comment/paul-scholes-column-i-hear-manchester-city-are-closing-on-pep-guardiola-for-next-summer--but-id-also-love-to-see-jrgen-klopp-managing-in-england-10183496.html

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  21. good stuff Robbo, and good luck, two wins eh and one of the others to draw just one game. Just one out of four, is it too much to ask?

    Just back from a glorious week in Florida where there is no State income tax. If weather is an indicator of the need for taxation, yer fucked.

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    1. And if you need major surgery in Florida, try the meat counter at Walmart

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    2. really? Is it that bad? I've seen the future and the future is….. drive through amputations.

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  22. No Stevie Me in the cup final, on his birthday no less.

    Thompson, Redknaap, McManaman, Souness, Owen and Lawro, unlucky lads, the televised Mickey circle jerk has been cancelled.

    You'll just have to do it sans camera as usual.

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  23. The interview with van gaal, with that pretend/insane sense of injustice the top managers seem to think it's necessary to assume after a loss, could only have been justified if the BBC interviewer really had killed his grandmother and hidden the body.

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  24. Wow... completely missed this one til today... after all that moaning about no blogs, and I spaced out. Sigh.

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