Tuesday 25 September 2012

Trials With Terry


What is it Chelsea fans say? ‘John Terry. Captain. Leader. Legend.’ Something like that. They’re understandably loyal at Chelsea mind you. The rest of us tend towards something like ‘John Terry. Loudmouth. Lech. Very Slow When Faced With A Striker Who Can Run A Bit.’

Of course the truth is somewhere in the middle.

The best thing about John Terry is that he’s stopped playing for England. Ah now, that was just my little joke. The best thing about him is all those things that Chelsea fans adore – his whole-heartedness, his never-say-die attitude, and the fact that for an English centre-back he’s really quite good at passing accurately to a team-mate.

Those of us who witnessed the slip -on-the-arse that crapped on his dreams in 2008 can’t have been unmoved. Indeed I moved from off the chair and on to the floor very quickly, guffaws raining from my throat. Then again, the bloke stepped up when, say, Knackersless Anelka couldn’t. 

On the pitch, the odd allegedly racist remark aside, he has been a model professional. He is very good at what he does, and was, undeniably one of the best England players at the Euros. It is off the pitch where most of his shit happens.

There have been rumours – and these are only rumours – that Terry took it upon himself to take guided tours around Stamford Bridge (the football ground not the site of the battle of 1066) for £10k a pop. (I think any monies accrued have been donated to charity since if indeed they were offered in the first place.)

It should be pointed out that he has been found not guilty of much of this stuff: not guilty of attacking a doorman with a bottle; not guilty of attacking a bottle-man with a door; not guilty of being racist whilst using racist language; not necessarily guilty of shagging Wayne Bridge’s bird when Wayne was still with her. Indeed Ms Perroncel, a lingerie model and ‘nightclub hostess’, has often denied the relationship. Which is good cos JT is the father of twins n that.

Frankly that whole saga never much bothered most people, did it? So Terry was an unreliable mate and a disloyal husband – it’s not like that sets him apart from any other footballing legend, is it, Ryan? And Bridge probably could have bought himself a huge, state-of-the-art pram from the money he was earning as a mercenary Citeh bench-warmer. Get over it.

The fact that this led to Terry losing the England captaincy was silly but inevitable. He still got to go to the 2010 World Cup, mind – partly because there wasn’t a player in the squad who wanted him back in England while they were away for three weeks - and at times he still seemed to feel that he was England skipper. That press conference betrayed a man who was quite happy to show how bent out of shape his conk was, regardless of the consequences. The consequences were that some bright young German things made the Captain, Leader, Legend look like Corporal Jones. He was far from alone.

When Capello returned to Terry as skipper most of us were gob-smacked. Mud was sticking to him like a sun-baked hippo, Ol’ Fab had always insisted that the captain’s name should make no difference, and there he was giving the armband to Football’s Dark Side. Odd, to say the least.

But it is of course all this racist stuff that has brought things to a head. It meant Terry lost the England captaincy again – which was fair enough with a charge like that dangling over his head. But to be perfectly (fat) frank, I feel a bit of sympathy for the bloke for the first time… ermmm, ever, actually. If the criminal courts have found him not guilty then why try him all over again in a courtroom with less stringent applications of the law?

I mean if he was charged with nicking an apple, found innocent, and then his employers had a quick tribunal type thing and thought that in all honestly he probably might have nicked the apple so that’s probably enough reason to say he did (particularly when scrumping is front-page news these days) then one might just feel that the world had gone tits up.

There is the idea floating around that Terry ‘had it coming’. He is not a model citizen. He must know what’s coming or he wouldn’t be resigning now. If nothing else, it has always been very obvious that playing for his country means a heck of a lot to him.

But it’s farewell, JT. I’m not sure that he’ll be a huge miss for the national team despite what Hodgson says. He resigns at a time when England could do with looking a little further ahead than the end of the last lot of hope-crushers. If we’re going to fail let’s get some new people to do it for us, eh?

Terry will go down as one of the best centre-backs England have had – and probably the least-loved. He's been a sort of necessary evil. Even Ashley Cole's value as a superb footballer has seen him tentatively embraced by the English public. But JT? Well on balance I'd say 'Captain. Leader. Knob-End.'

247 comments:

  1. that's the decent thing to do for JT and he realised it .. which is surprising

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  2. I'm of the belief that he's part of the generation that should be moved on from the England team anyway, despite Hodgson hanging on to them all. So for him to make this gesture of falling on his sword and trying to take the moral highground stinks a bit too much for me.

    As you said Robbo, a great player at times, one of few that are left who take great pride in wearing an England shirt, but an utter, utter cunt (sorry Bells) off the pitch.

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  3. haha, was thinking too long :) top blog Robbo, always been a fan.

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  4. Terry's retirement is clearly a case of jumping before he's pushed. That much is obvious.

    Question is, should he be answering a case before the FA at all, considering his aquittal in the court-case. I think the answer's yes, and here's why:

    1) The FA has it's own set of laws to enforce. It has UEFA and FIFA guidelines to enforce. It can't and shouldn't defer to other authorities to enforce these regulations.

    2) The courts have to prove beyond reasonable doubt that Terry said the things he probably said. The FA only have to believe he probably said them. It can use the fairly obvious video evidence as well as testimonies to put two and two together. The FA know the sort of things that go on on a football pitch. They know the sort of character Terry is. And they will be under pressure from UEFA, FIFA, ambassadors, partners, sponsors, and many other directions, all wanting them to make an example of Terry. As they should.

    On a seperate note, I, like Noel above, am glad I won't see him play for England again, as I too feel it's high time we moved on from the failed "Golden Generation" era.

    Lampard, Gerrard, Cole and co need to be replaced with the next generation, as it's clear to most that those players weren't good enough to win past tournaments, and aren't good enough to win future tournaments either. Why persist with them now through their twilight years? Get some younger players some international experience and develop a more modern tactical approach with more technically-adept footballers. Surely that's the way forward?

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  5. Adverts on the local TV channel pronouncing Heskey as the new saviour of the Newcastle Jets. The commentary says '87 caps for England, over 500 Premiership appearances, including 107 for Liverpool'. No mention of any goals scored as I guess that statistic won't draw the punters in. A front two of Emile Heskey and Michael Bridges. It's a good thing there's no relegation in the A-League.

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  6. Guilty or not guilty? I think you give him too much benefit of the very little doubt that exists Robbo.

    He managed to get away with the racist slur which he clearly mouths in a criminal court because the burden of proof is higher but Christ how much higher can it be. "i was just passing a friendly rejoinder that I hadn't called him a black cunt." wtf? Guilty.

    Peroncells denials make Andrew Mitchells look like the model of credibility. Guilty.

    And I am that bottle man, going about my innocent bottle collecting hobby in a field in Kent one November morning in 2006 when out of the blue Terry attacked me with a door. Guilty.

    But as I mentioned on previous blog what I found truly nauseating about this wheedling posturing amoral pitiful excuse for a man is the way nothing is ever his fault. Witness his burning martyr routine over his retirement "its all the FAs fault sniff sniff." The FA instead of its bland rebuttal should have released a press statement saying simply "No john its your own fault because you consistently behave like a twat". JT is eternally Not Guilty in his own mind, robbo, he doesn't need any help there from us.

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  7. Having said all that I do think he attracts disproportionate villification. He's not the criminal scum I'm sure we've all encountered I think he's just someone whose moral code only extends to what he thinks he can get away with ie a bit of a bell-end. It's just that I expect a bit more from the England captain, its a representative position and I don't think JT has ever understood that.

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    Replies
    1. he is not the criminal scum, agreed. His mum and dad are.

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  8. I'm glad he's gone,can't stand the guy

    And, no Rio, you're not the man to fill his boots, lets move on

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  9. no regrets here either, in fact its kinda like watching the classroom bully havin to eat a shit sandwich.

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  10. He may well be a very unpleasant human being,but he wasn't the worst centre half I've ever seen.

    I'm sure the multi millionaire John Terry can cope with people thinking he's a toss pot.

    Perhaps that's the worst thing.

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  11. Blog and other regular readers may note that there is a reason for articulating a long list of things JT is 'not guilty' of. General Pincohet got away with a lot too, I understand.

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    Replies
    1. Mainly because he was the penalty taker for the national Chilean team.

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    2. Think he was the one giving away the penalties jacks.

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  12. This is just bollox considering the slating you gave Suarez. Both Terry and Suarez acted in a racists manner. In fact, you can throw Rio Ferdinand in too for the "choc-ice" comment.

    You can't have different levels of racism. You are either one or you are not.

    And, whilst on the subject, the FA's handling of the "choc-ice" comment is just a joke to say the least.

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  13. Why is it I think that next month he will say Roy has talked me round and I am looking forward to Rio (de Janeiro not Antons brother).
    Did Rio (Antons brother)write the choc ice comment or was it some one else on his twitter
    Del

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    Replies
    1. Rio retweeted (actually replied) to the original choc-ice comment saying "choc-ice is classic. i know what you mean' or words to the effect.

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    2. Thanks for clearing that up for me,
      good luck with the ffl
      del

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  14. Afternoon peeps.

    In my humble opinion I think we're all missing what's really important with this issue.

    It surely comes as no surprise to anyone that JT's gonna paint himself as a martyr, he's always had a "what the fuck did I do wrong?" attitude about all his transgressions.

    There's also no denying that he was a decent enough CB and had a real passion when playing for England.

    Everybody and their mum knows that he is a bit of a scumbucket, a self serving twat and definetly called Anton Ferdinand "a black cunt", the proof is insomountable, but all the above is just a smokescreen for what I think is really the main issue;

    The biggest question should be why the hell it's taken the FA so long to resolve this issue?

    This incident happened last October, that's almost a whole year ago, how the fuck can anyone justify that?

    The Suarez v Evra incident happened in the same month, yet Suarez was accused, tried, scentenced and punished before the end of that year. Yet until now the FA have failed to do anything about JT. How can this be deemed fair?

    Why were Chelsea allowed to go on in the PL and reach an FA Cup and CL final with their squad intact while Liverpool lost the services of one of their players?

    Even though they had already stripped him of the captaincy forcing the then manager to resign was JT not brought up sooner because he was a member of the England squad and the FA did not want to disturb the England camps build up(any futher)?

    If so, then isn't this racism in itself perpetrated by the FA?

    What I see is that if you're an English racist then we'll give you time, but if you're a Johnny Foriegner racist then you'll be swiftly dealt with.

    Whatever the outcome, once again the knobs at the FA have handled this atrociosly and something has got to be done about their archaic ways..............

    But it won't.

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    Replies
    1. I'm not trying to defend the FA who seem to balls up the most basic of tasks but I think that the main problem was that once the police got involved and it became a matter for the courts the FA couldn't act before in case they prejudiced the court case by finding him guilty ahead of that. As the police weren't involved in the Suarez incident the FA could act on it straight away.

      Colch

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    2. But the police did take action before the FA, didnt they?

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    3. My understanding is that the FA was looking into it and then the police complaint went in and at that point the FA had to stop while it was investigated and then went through the courts.

      Colch

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    4. The problem has been the police investigation - which was almost never going to result in a conviction as it was based on hearsay evidence (lip-reading from a video is not considered primary evidence) and therefore very hard to prove "beyond reasonable doubt". Without that, the FA would have had to act - albeit very uncomfortably - prior to the Euro's.

      After Suarez, the FA have to look like they are not racist themselves (anti-south American) and I can't see the balance of evidence getting Terry off. The only saving grace appears to be the relative lack of reaction from Anton Ferdinand and his early testimony that he hadn't heard anything himself. If Ferdinand has gone back on this (I am not sure of the current status of his testimony) then it says something more about what his (Ferdinand's) role has been.

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  15. Well said as always, Robbo. JT makes me uncomfortable as a Chelsea fan. Then again, most sides have at least a few less-than-gentlemen out there every week. I get the feeling most people won't be happy until he is convicted of something, anything, even if it takes a kangaroo court. (In his next stop in the A-League.)

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  16. The campaign starts here for the perfect replacement for JT........

    Ryan Shawcross for England!!!!!!!

    Would love to see how far he could kick Lionel Messi if he could get close enough to him.

    Colch

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    Replies
    1. Is that an alternative to midget throwing?

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  17. The sign at Liverpool airport says 'above us only sky'. Someone has added 'below us only QPR and Reading'

    (Tim_Burgess on Twitter)

    Colch

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    Replies
    1. That's a bit of an old one Colch, started during Woy's days, the original joke was "below you only West Ham'. Seeing as we had a wafer thin squad to start with and we have alredy lost Lucas for a few months, Agger and Kelly for the rest of the year and Borini for an undetermined period, it could well be "below us only well..er..holy fuck, there's no one below us".

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    2. Don't get too downcast AH. Until the sending off Liverpool were the better side. What everyone seems to have ignored in all the contoversy surrounding the sending off is the generally abject Man U. performance.

      Spider

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    3. As a Man Utd fan, I can only say wtf? United play like strangers and manage to get the points. As Lawro said... Ominous.

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    4. Fair point, Anon MU fan, there is nothing like playing poorly but still winning. You could probably look at all their championship winning seasons and find games where they "won ugly" it is an attribute of all top teams.

      Spider

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  18. Next year at this time it will be 'below us only Derby, Charlton, Wednesday...'

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  19. Not much left to say about Terry. His decision to retire from international football came about three years too late but at least now we have one less arsehole in the England squad. Now to be arsehole free we just need Rooney, Gerrard and Cole to hand in their notice. Then if fat frank does the right thing and follows his club skipper into retirement we can finally get on with the task of team building.

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    1. I think Rooney would be better suited to a midfield role for England. His striking has been a bit shit lately.

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    2. If by 'lately' you mean the last 6 years?

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    3. I meant for Man Utd, but I take your point. He was good at Euro 2004 but that was about it.

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  20. Always grateful for the online 'British food shop' in Australia. Just received my latest order from them and just had a snack of a few packets of scampi flavoured fries washed down with a can of Irn Bru. Bliss.

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  21. Chelsea are asking police to investigate the theft of six wallets, nine mobile phones and several watches from their training ground.

    Does Mr J Terry have an alibi?

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  22. I take your point re Suarez. Terry's obviously brought in a legal team that could split the hairs on a flea's forelegs and that's what's meant he's got away with it in court. If the FA come to a different conclusion then surely the whole thing's become a bit of a mockery. Having said that Terry would have to get the same punsihment as Suarez or that too would be a travesty. The postponing of the court case in the first place was a ridiculous piece of chicanery by Terry's legal team. But the FA have let themselves be pulled about like a puppy on a big leash and once again you're left with the impression that the fact that this bloke was England captain meant that he was given way more leeway than anyone else. The happy result of all this is that Terry is now Chelsea's probem and no one else's. Phew.

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  23. And they say politics makes for strange bedfellows:

    Warnock Jan 2011 "For many years I have thought he (Diouf) was the gutter type – I was going to call him a sewer rat but that might be insulting to sewer rats."

    Warnock (today) "Diouf's current deal with Leeds runs out at the turn of the New Year, but Warnock is convinced that the striker won't be going anywhere. "Dioufy will not go anywhere else, he's promised me certain things and I'm happy with that," Warnock said.

    ------------------
    From worse than a sewer rat to Dioufy in a season and a bit. Funny stuff.

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  24. Forgive my lack of British background knowledge, but is this a common phrase, as uttered by Sam Allardyce when bemoaning his team's poor defending in the League Cup...

    "We couldn't defend a fish supper."

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/19726946

    Do you often spend time defending fish suppers? Or did your poor fish supper-defending ability lead to your reliance on whelks?

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    Replies
    1. Actually, now that I think of it, I'm good at defending a fish supper. My kitten loves to try to barge into whatever I'm eating, so I'm practicing food-defense almost every day. If anyone needs lessons, just let me know. We start with food that doesn't need utensils, move to food you can cut with a fork, then food that requires a knife, and finally soup.

      Delete
  25. Man U won ugly at west ham

    Then they lost ugly to man c

    Then Man C lost ugly for a while when he went home to Argentina.

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  26. It's sams own litotes, Stephen. I wouldn't like to get between that fat bastard and his fish n chips though.

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  27. Emile Heskey has flown to Australia to kick start his career.

    He is shortly expected to touch down in New Zealand.

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    Replies
    1. Australian side Newcastle Jets have had to place an order for an additional 5,000 Emile Heskey jerseys after they sold out of their first batch following the striker's move to the New South Wales club.
      ================================
      What is wrong with the Aussies. Did they mistake him for somebody else ?

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    2. As someone who lives in Newcastle, Australia, I'd like to say that, while there has been some excitement (mainly whipped up by the local paper), every Jets fan that I've spoken to is very underwhelmed by Heskey arriving, and absolutely no-one is expecting to see many goals from him.

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  28. Wow, how awesome is that. Liverpool's kids doing one better than the first team at the hawthorns. The silver lining of completely bolloxing the transfer window is the excitement that comes from seeing people like 16 yr old Jerome Sinclair playing. Hell not just playing, but winning.

    Demetris Ioannides on Twitter: "Jamie Carragher has played 555 more games for Liverpool than all his teammates tonight put together."

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  29. Good stuff Robbo. Excellent footballer, past his best now, cunt off the field.

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  30. I'm not sure I follow trotsky but if I read you correctly I think your saying that for john terry the framus intersects with the ramistan approximately at the paternoster

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    Replies
    1. If you follow Leon Trotsky, you'd better be sure about it, Blog!

      As for JT, yes, exactly!

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  31. Double boost for arsenals hopes.as.willshere and rooney return

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  32. Four match ban for terry despite being allowed to drag his case on enough for him to play all of last season's games. As captain of the English team, I would've expected him to get at least the same if not more than Suarez.

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  33. So, guilty it is then;

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/19723020

    About time.

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  34. AH.

    Surely you're not accusing the FA of having double standards?

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  35. So Capello resigned in defence of his racist captain?

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  36. Everyone happy now that he's officially guilty, or do we need to garrotte him, too?

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  37. John Terry. Captain. Leader. Racist.

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  38. England lost to West Indies in the T20 World Cup today despite a blinder from Eoin Morgan. still in with a chance of making the semis if we beat Sri Lanka and New Zealand.

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  39. RiP...


    Clouseau: You have received a beump on the head.
    Dreyfus: Beump?
    Clouseau: What?
    Dreyfus: You said beump.
    Clouseau: Yes, I know that. It is a large beump. You could receive the concussion from such a beump.

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  40. Dreyfus: ... You are suspended for six months, without pay, effective immediately! Have you anything to say?
    Inspector Jacques Clouseau: ...Could you lend me fifty francs?

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  41. So just to be clear then, the FA have decided that John Terry is only half as racist as Luis Suarez, is that correct?

    Colch

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    Replies
    1. either that or calling someone a black cunt is only half as bad as calling someone black.

      Or maybe they were only half convinced at the end of it all that he was racist.

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    2. so in comparison to Suarez he got;

      A. a 4 week reduction for the addition of "cunt"
      B. a 4 week reduction because he resigned from International football?
      C. a 4 week reduction because he's English?
      D. a 4 week reduction because he's represented by a top lawyer who made a deal with the FA.

      It's a load of bollocks. The message to the youth of the country is that if you play football it's ok to call your opponent a cunt.

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    3. Well maybe not seeing as they fined him 220k as opposed to Suarez's 40k fine, I guess they maybe considered it a worse crime, but hey hang on, half the games ban, so er..maybe..umm...fuck it, its too complicated. Maybe the 215 page verdict they release might throw some light on this.

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  42. that must be 2 weeks wages for JT and 4 weeks wages for Suarez, perfectly proportional AH.

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  43. It's perfectly straightforward guys, I thought I'd already explained this clearly enough. Quite simply the FA decided that the framus intersects with the ramistan approximately at the paternoster

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    Replies
    1. The scary thing about that is you could be right, and that might exactly have been their reasoning.

      Delete
  44. Thankfully, Joey Barton weighs in sensibly enough, complete with "tickling" reference.

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/19749030

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  45. Suarez got double the suspension because he couldn't have known how sensitive the English (and French) would be to his particular use of the word "negro", while Terry should have known that "black" was offensive. Or is that backwards...

    Actually, the difference could be in "black" as a descriptor for other profanity vs. "negro" as the entire insult. If Terry had called Rio a motherfucking shitwhore of a cuntbag, then I suppose he would have gotten off without punishment, right? But calling someone a negro (okay in your own country, apparently) gets eight matches. And using "black" as an adjective gets your four matches.

    What are the odds for the next racist incident? If you can win $10k for your kid playing for Man U (http://sports.yahoo.com/blogs/soccer-dirty-tackle/ryan-tunnicliffe-dad-wins-10-000-bet-manchester-183832119--sow.html) then you must be able to come up with some crazy stuff...

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  46. Blog's right again.....it's a quote from Paulie in the Sopranos.

    Best Answer - Chosen by Voters

    I thought that was a fancy way of telling AJ that he was buying too much into what the press was telling him. The Framus appears to a combination of the framework or history that people keep craming down your throat to moralise a thesis that this is how the world should be and if you don't accept that then you are mistaken. The ramistan is the latest outrage they ram down your throat, in this case Afghanitan and the Taliban and the war in Iraq, which as Paulie sees it you can not change and it seems to be created by those same idelas he just spoke of intersecting at the one truth that he believes in , family. The Paternostra is a vague reference to the fact that organized crime in their world is male dominated family oriented group and it is there to protect your interests as a family. What Paulie is trying to convey here to AJ is that you need to get your priorties straight, family first, countries and the world way down the line. In other words, he is tell AJ to shut up and listen to his father more before he finds himself out of the one thing he can truly count on, family. Paulie is old school smart.

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  47. Fuck me and I thought paulie was just talking shite

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    Replies
    1. no way, Paulie's a deep thinker, well read too. The Bada Bing was just a cover for hs more intellectual pursuits.

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    2. Those intellectual pursuits would be the ladies hanging off the poles at the Bada Bing I'm guessing.

      Delete
  48. The workings of this is starting to seem like quantum physics, the state apparatus of 14th C Bytantium and Finnegans wake all wrapped up in godels theory of indeterminacy written in illegible handwriting on the back of an Evening Sentinel article about Stochastic remodeling but the thing I find funny about it is that according to JTs version of events all he was telling Ferdinand was that he wasn't calling him a black cunt so....unless Ferdinand actually said "did you call me a black cunt", and if he'd admitted having said that its a non issue do I assume he didn't.... JT is in groundhog day endlessly repeating a denial no one believes like a kid with jam all round his mouth denying he ate a jam butty

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  49. Pardews got a contract do long he'll be like Jeremy benthams pickled corpse sitting on the bench by contractual right for 300 years after his death

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    Replies
    1. You have the most vivid imagination of all the people I don't really know.

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    2. I'm going to agree with that statement AH and firmly believe that meeting all 7 billion of you fuckers would be pointless in attempting to disprove it.

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    3. If you met all 7 billion of us, you'd know us, so he'd still have the most vivid imagination of all the people you don't really know.

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    4. All 7 billion would be all the people I don't know at all. Bloggy is one of those few "I dont really know", as in I think I know but who knows, he could be a 55 year old woman.

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  50. Not sure how many of you follow the Bugle, and this is a week late given the chanting theme, but the best-ever death-related football chants start at about 16:00. Back it up a bit further for more context, or don't. (Or just listen to the whole thing.)

    http://thebuglepodcast.com/?p=431

    Somehow I picture Joey Barton leading the chants rather than Andy Zaltzman.

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  51. I can't believe I'm typing this but I actually agree (in principle) with Pulis. Give the pricks who want to gain an advantage through cheating time on the bench to think about it... not sure about a three match ban (1 less than than for racially abusing an opponent - if you are English that is.) but certainly one or two matches.

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    Replies
    1. That's all well and good about the diving, but cheating is cheating, here's what Darth had to say after Timmaah Crouch mixed basketball with footy to score against Citeh;

      "I haven't see it, but if Peter's got away with it then brilliant,"


      Pulis is a fucking hypocrite.

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  52. If you believe the beeb's home page, Terry is now part of the Ryder cup.

    http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/411/beebh.jpg/

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  53. I played Ridgewood on Tuesday, home of the Ryder Cup 77 years ago and more recently The Barclays. The club house has a gold replica of the trophy and all sorts of pictures from over the decades, very cool as the Yanks say.

    In related trivia, over the last 5 years they've cut down 4,000 trees, leaving only 2,000 on the course. I hit all of them.

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  54. Liverpool manager Brendan Rodgers has threatened that his players may start diving after failing to get the "rub of the green" from referees.

    Full story: the Guardian

    So all this time Suarez has been trying to stay on his feet?

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    Replies
    1. Yeah but he's no good at it. Everytime he dives he gets either nothing or worse still, yellow carded. We need someone better who could do a welbeck/valencia and get us a couple penalties along the road.

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    2. you should sign Jacques Cousteau

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    3. Seems like what we actually have are a number of Jacques Clouseaus.

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  55. Big game away to bradford ...the Pope will be celebrating with a curry thus time tomorrow

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  56. Without doubt I'm the only one on this blog watching the Being:Liverpool mini series. While it makes really interesting viewing for any Liverpool supporter, having seen just the first episode so far, I have to say that I am really, really, and I mean REALLY disliking Ian Ayre. He probably had about 3 minutes in the 45 minute episode, but that was enough for me to reach my conclusion.

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  57. Steve Kean 'forced to resign' as Blackburn Rovers manager.
    =======================================
    About fucking time I guess. Strangely kept his spot despite being relegated, and was kicked out when they're in an automatic promotion spot.

    ReplyDelete
  58. what? Kean has gone? The Blackburn fans'll be gutted. Is Rafa moving in?

    ReplyDelete
  59. One good thing about being a 55 yr old port vale fan is I get in for free by pretending to be a cleaner. Then there's verbally abusing the ref with impunity and watching the dozy prat next to me getting ejected from the ground cos the police can't believe a 55 yr old lady just called the ref a fucking cheating cunt. Best thing of all though is the look on the opposition fans face when I fucking twat the bastard .

    ReplyDelete
  60. Wait... what did it take to force Kean to resign if none of the rest of the bs took got through? Did they threaten to make him wear a chicken suit?

    They're third in the Championship at the moment. What happens if they don't get promoted?

    Oh well, guess he chickened out. Or his goose was cooked. Maybe he just got hen-pecked. Perhaps their next manager will be a Jamaican--hire a roosterfarian!

    ReplyDelete
  61. I'm coming to the view that Brendan rodgers believes his own hype, a bit like Phil "you've been tangoed" brown a few seasons ago. The fly on the wall documentary and the way he is criticizing Enrique and the hapless and obviously on the way out Stewart downing (who will never be a left back in a million years) is a major departure from kop traditions. It's almost like he's saying to the American owners look I'm the anti-Kenny.

    This statement is absolutely hilarious... actually its borderline insane... expect to see Brenda tilting at a windmill near you soon......

    "I believe that 70-plus points will allow you to arrive in the top four. So that gives us 68 points that we need over the remaining games."

    That's right Brenda, and Reading need only 69 points and they're champs.

    ReplyDelete
  62. Anyone have a working link to a live stream for the
    arsenal v chelsea game

    ReplyDelete
  63. Try here Bo;

    http://firstrowsportal.com/

    ReplyDelete
  64. One all at the emirates but I thought we had the best of it. I feel confident going into the second half.

    ReplyDelete
  65. or espn3.com which is incredible (thanks AH). It's just like tele!

    ReplyDelete
  66. 2-1 so far being the worst possible result starting of the FFL against Colch with Torres getting a goal. Hmm...my stint at the top could be quite Hull-esque.

    Nice to see Wisdom, Suso and Sterling starting for Liverpool.

    ReplyDelete
  67. So how was I to know the second half was develope into an episode of comedy playhouse.

    ReplyDelete
  68. Fuckin hell.10 goals in the last 2 games for liverpool despite playing all the U-19s we could grab hold off. Not half bad. And good to see Suarez grab 3 goals and an assist despite being denied the most stonewall of penalties.

    ReplyDelete
  69. I'm really hoping that this fan had his tongue firmly in his cheek when he tweeted this.....

    danny coghill ‏@tollegion5
    @ColU_Official brasil in blue and white stripes

    Either that or they've let the local mental patients stop licking the windows and put down their crayons and given them access to twitter. From what I saw we were shit for 15 minutes and then not bad for the rest of the game.

    Colch

    ReplyDelete
  70. Fabregas turning into a bit of a twat, pressure's telling...

    --BeeZee

    ReplyDelete
  71. Was that 10 years' worth of disallowed goals, Fergie-time winners, controversial decisions and broken hearts all coming back to bite Taggart on the arse? What a fucking game! AVB haters pretty quiet in the media today.

    And Fergie complaining that 4 minutes of injury time was an insult. What a complete and utter twat.

    Grand Final day in the NRL today, so settling down on the sofa at 10am, opening my first cold VB and watching 7 hours of build up and the game itself. Just like the old FA Cup final days when I was a little lad. Without the VB obviously - I drank Stella back then.

    Bo, did you catch the AFL Grand final yesterday? Sydney Swans beat Hawthorn.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I was cheering on the Swans Noel. A great last quarter.

      Poor Taggart eh, time goes against him for once and he spits the dummy and babbles like a baby. What a wanker.

      Delete
  72. Just been away for a month and returned expecting to find myself bottom of the fantasy leagues but not doing too bad (H2H at least...)

    Heard Fergie complained about Fergie Time... What have I come back to...

    ReplyDelete
  73. Saf's like the old relative at a family party who pisses everyone off knowing that no one will be as rude or bolshie in return. Expect more of his manipulative bollocks because their midfield is a bit crap and now the defense is creaking. Moyes must be a good shout to replace him. Season after season of over achievement on a relative shoestring at everton.

    Speaking of creaking. MotD is looking tired ain't it. The bullies at itv have the advantage and cliche monger Hanson is not going to return like pele in escape to victory to score an overhead bicycle kick with a broken rib. I have to put up with mundane tweets from players now? Where's the ff.

    ReplyDelete
  74. I've been posting on this blog for months and none of my posts have been showing up. Set up a Google profile and hope this test post shows up.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Profile, don't doubt for one minute that your posts made more sense than the ones that were actually visible.

      Delete
    2. None of my posts make any sense, except maybe this one line...

      Auto sign-on doesn't appear to work here, so have to sign-in every time. Only problem is that I have so many damn passwords, can't seem to remember all of them -- mind you, at 55 I've done enough thinking for two seventy-year olds, so probably heading towards double-alzheimers.

      Delete
  75. Hmm..looks like Colch has got me in both H2Hs. Unless QPR win by 2 and Tomkins doesnt score for West Ham, I'm done for.

    ReplyDelete
  76. Creeping up the leagues, good pool victory, scum lose at home and now USA bottle it! What a weekend! Shame rest of my life is shite!
    Bisq

    ReplyDelete
  77. I can squeak back into the win column as long as West Ham win or draw tomorrow. Probably. Possibly. Maybe.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. in my case, i got ji sung park playing so hope he score a lot of goals he he

      Delete
  78. Isn't golf fantastic. Fuckin' briliant, well done Europe.

    ReplyDelete
  79. It's all shite: the weather, the football, the politics.

    ReplyDelete
  80. Blogidy, I'd recorded both of the MotD's from the weekend and watched them in the early hours of this morning.

    Just when I thought that program couldn’t possibly get any worse, someone at the Beeb decided to put Gary Lineker in a blond wig and a dress ,put Mick Eckythump McCarthy on the pundits coach and flash random tweets from illiterates after every game, thank the lord for the ff button on my remote. Just over two hours of football related “entertainment” viewed in less then 38 minutes.

    ReplyDelete
  81. And England out of the T20 World Cup. Was hoping we'd at least make the semis. T20 isn't real cricket anyway.

    ReplyDelete
  82. Wow..close game between Colch and me. At the end of everything but bonus points for the west ham-qpr game, I lead by 2. Jaskalainnen definitely in for some bonus, hopefully its 1 or 2.

    ReplyDelete
  83. I don't know why I looked, but I did, and it didn't disappoint. Garth Crooks team of the week. I only got as far as the second player: 'Jan Vertonghen - the Dutch defender...' He's Belgian, Garth, you fucking prick.

    This after the Beeb reported an interview with Sergio Aguero where the player said that in every country, the home players get better treatment then foreigners, but he didn't believe that it was a problem in England. But the BBC instead went with 'Aguero says foreigners are treated unfairly'. Am I just getting older and more cynical, or is the standard of the media dropping so far, so fast?

    Another loss for Mark Hughes, and another red card for his team. Makes your heart bleed doesn't it?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. No Noel, the standards are dropping and fast.

      Delete
  84. Man gets head stuck in bin heh heh heh http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-north-east-orkney-shetland-19790191

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Apparently he was looking for his hat.

      Good job it wasn't Paul Young.

      Delete
  85. Morning jacks - turns out the scotsman with his head stuck in the bin was SAF looking for his old hairdrier. The new one doesn't work.

    ReplyDelete
  86. H - MotD is approaching the unwatchable. Mock McIrishman is a cartoon figure. Brains Hanson is a Thunderbird puppet. Bizarrely gabby Logan/ that bloke off the crisp advert are interchangeable..have they ever been seen in the same room together? ....there couldn't be a bigger gap between football insight and smug self satisfaction if the presenters were Julian clarey, Julian assange and Julie fuckin birchill.

    ReplyDelete
  87. Moin moin Blogs.

    I gave up on MOTD and The Football League programme a long time ago.Lazy,smug,and cliche-ridden nonsense.I'm surprised they don't move the set to a golf club bar.

    ReplyDelete
  88. Don't think I've been in a golf club bar,I might fit in though having a 2 handicap





    money and the wife
    del

    ReplyDelete
  89. BBC sports coverage is turned into rather rubbish, hasnt it?

    ReplyDelete
  90. Good advice, as always....

    http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?p=55635407#post55635407

    ReplyDelete
  91. GENTLEMEN. Speed up your lovemaking by playing Benny Hill's theme tune 'Yackety Sax' in the bedroom.

    ReplyDelete
  92. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  93. So Alex did you find your hat in that bin?

    I'll no answer that. We're here to talk about footba.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think he found his lucky chewing gum though!

      Delete
  94. Bolton manager Owen Coyle: "Our performance level, particularly in the first half, was outstanding in terms of passing, moving the ball and creating chances.
    "We showed a lot of spirit and grit to get back into the game. The skipper [Kevin Davies] epitomised everything we want at the football club, and in truth we should have gone on to win the game.
    "There's a lot to be pleased about in respect of the performance level, but we're disappointed to have passed up two points. Those results will come."

    When Owen? In Div.1? Load o' bollocks. Nice chap though.

    ReplyDelete
  95. It's hard to take, going to the bbc page to see van Persie rescues Un**ed (yet again.) It was bad enough losing him but to lose him to Taggart was the fucking pits...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Better than him going to City alongside the rest of your ex-players though.

      Based on last night United need to go back to 4-4-2 with Rooney and Van Persie up top and play how we used to. This 4-3-1-2 malarky just isn't working

      Delete
  96. don't worry Bo, he's due for a season ending chipped nail or somat.

    ReplyDelete
  97. Gerardo Bedoya, the colombian joey barton

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. http://sports.yahoo.com/blogs/soccer-dirty-tackle/dtotd-gerardo-bedoya-earns-41st-career-red-card-012913006--sow.html

      --BeeZee

      Delete
  98. Brilliant punditry from Gary Neville. Since lee Dixon left (not boring? Round faced? enough) THIS is what motd is missing....


    http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/blog/2012/oct/02/gary-neville-sky-tv-rio-ferdinand

    ReplyDelete
  99. It'll be a sad day when I eventually come round to liking Gary Neville, but he's bloody good at what he's doing now. In fact, he was always bloody good at what he did. If he hadn't been such a cunt then it'd be so much easier. If he played for any other club, I'd have always liked him. But he didn't. And so I haven't.

    ReplyDelete
  100. Reply is not working for me.

    No Adam, I would prefer to see van Persie in blue mate... better dead than red, as the phrase goes.

    If, when you say play like we used to, you were referring to 1974 Adam, I totally concur.

    ReplyDelete
  101. Trott, I don't wish van Persie to suffer anything too serious, a career ending break would suffice.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That's nice and reasonable.

      Delete
  102. Bo,

    how's life in your new adopted country?

    Hope you are doing well.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Life here is very different to life in Australia mate and the difference is what I love about the place. I am very adaptable so the change in lifestyle hasn't been difficult to handle. We are moving into our new house in November... that will improve things even more.

      Delete
  103. Sadly not been about for a while as firstly very busy in job - total outrage having to actually earn my money - and secondly suffered a repetitive injury on Sunday morning, when I fell off my chair laughing when I saw Man U v Spurs result (when done to you Noel & co)

    Some people might think that Chelsea were well matched in last nights game, but obviously us fans know better and that they were just toying with the bacon munching players of the other team, leading them into a false sense of hope that at one-nil, until last ten minutes, they may have some hope of equalising. Superb tactics from Di Matteo and the players impressed me by following his instructions so well.
    Right now to read what has been going on with you lot in my absense

    ReplyDelete
  104. Fergie has a part time job as a journalist now.

    http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/football/teams/manchester-united/9258810/Manchester-United-have-cause-for-complaint-as-unique-survey-highlights-Premier-League-errors.html

    ReplyDelete
  105. Can I just say that we're 2nd and Liverpool are nowhere? Yes? That's ok then...the Belgians are coming...:)

    ReplyDelete
  106. Replies
    1. But not in the basement because that's the first place they'll look.

      Delete
  107. I've kept quiet on the Robing van Pursestrings situation, but I have to say I agree with Bo, I'd rather have seen him at Cireh and I could of understood him moving there more.

    He and his agents made his position at us untenable with that infamous statement, it was basically a plee to the clubs that pay stupid wages to come get him, he was looking for a pay hike and was hoping for a move to Barca, Real or Citeh, yet none of them came in for him. The only big euro team that did was Juve, but after hearing what he was demanding in pay they could only offer about 25p for his transfer fee.

    Don't believe for a second that when that statement was made that he'd envisioned himself at OT, and if you want to give me any of that little boy inside of me crap, then I'll show you that little boy;

    http://www.talksport.co.uk/sites/default/files/imagecache/ts_magazine_big_picture/RVP180812.jpg

    You can also say that he went to IOU to win trophies, but I believe if they are victorious this season it will be because of him, he makes an average team better.

    It's sad the way he left, but that's just the way it is in football, players want to make as much dough as possible and I for one can't blame them for that, just don't try to con us with all the - It's not about the money- bullshit when it clearly is.

    United have got a hell of a player, I'll never deny that, but it won't stop me throwing up a bit in my mouth everytime I see him in a red devil shirt. Going to that lot he betrayed us all and shattered his legacy.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. H2H, although not an Arsenal fan, I feel your pain. As you say, it's all about the money and players going through the charade of, "I don't really want to leave but unless you give me a shed-load of dosh I'm off.." leaves a bad taste in the mouth. Your only consolation may be that RvP is 29, his best years may well be behind him and in 3 years he'll be off to the USA.

      Spider

      Delete
  108. Roger T.

    Everton are looking very good this year, I always wondered what would happen if you lot started the season with the rest of us in August instead of mid December.

    Better get Moyes to sign a new contract or IOU will come sniffing around and try to snap him up for parts to feed to their Dark Lord to keep him young.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm getting the gloating in early as once we have a couple of injuries/suspensions to any of Fella/ Peanut/Jelavic we'll start sliding down the table as our squad is woefully short in quality (re Leeds) if not for once, numbers.
      My theory is that Moyes has suddenly lost his fear of strikers in order to say to the Glazers "Look, I do know where the goal is, see?" As for going to OT whoever takes that job after Ol' Beetroot Face is on a hiding to nothing. If it's Moyes then good luck to him, he'll need it.

      Delete
    2. Indeed.

      Speaking of managers and contracts;

      Just when you thought that Mike Ashley was doing a decent job at not being a complete turnip, he reverts to type and give his management team 8 year contracts.

      Now, I'll be the first to admit that Pardew has done a pretty decent job at the Whateveritscalledthisyearpark, but EIGHT years? Surely that's a huge gamble?

      I see many tipping them for a top 4 finish this time around, personally I can't see it, so what happens if they don't do so well this time? Even worse if they hit a slump? That would be some hell of a payoff if it all goes pear shaped.

      Delete
    3. Isn't Ashley already pear-shaped?

      Delete
  109. Mark Hughes, 48, has been assured by owner Tony Fernandes that he retains the full support of the Queens Park Rangers board and there will be no knee-jerk reaction to the club's position at the bottom of the Premier League.

    Full story: the Guardian
    ====

    Two weeks bye bye, then?

    ReplyDelete
  110. Maybe Ashley has a bet on whether Henry Winter can manage the cross-Tyne swim and will recoup the cost of the contract betting on him with the Guardian and red-tops

    ReplyDelete
  111. Bournemouth have parted company with boss Paul Groves and assistant Shaun Brooks after winning just one of their 10 league games this season.

    -----------------

    Guess Harry's not going to QPR then. On his doorstep this one.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Didn't 'Arry first make his name at Bournemouth in the mid-eighties when they beat some big northern team 1 - 0 in the third round of the FA Cup?

      Spider

      Delete
  112. http://uk.eurosport.yahoo.com/blogs/world-of-sport/cheeky-penalty-trick-foiled-quick-witted-keeper-140527994.html

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Failed.

      Maybe they should try this corner;

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cF3kO5W80N8&feature=player_embedded

      Delete
    2. Now that's how to take a corner.

      Mind you,I've seen worse penalties taken before.

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Rssr9a3xPU

      Delete
  113. harsh Bo, should he be fed to the pigs as well?

    ReplyDelete
  114. I think Bo would have him hung, drawn and quartered if he could.

    ReplyDelete
  115. Come on guys, fed to the pigs, hung, drawn and quartered... where's your imagination... hang him by his thumbs over a charcoal fire with vera lynn's "we'll meet again" playing on a loop until the hair on his head begin's to smoke, then you can hang, draw and quarter him and feed him to the pigs.

    ReplyDelete
  116. Ryan Shawcross named in the England squad.

    I'm staying out of anything written on here about him.

    ReplyDelete
  117. that call up should help scratch an itch or two eh Jacks!

    ReplyDelete
  118. What's wrong with Shawcross being called up.... just replacing one arsehole with another is all.

    ReplyDelete
  119. http://www.ipswichtown-mad.co.uk/news/tmnw/chopra_and_heffernan_charged_by_bha_761275/index.shtml

    The same Michael Chopra that Ipswich had to advance £250k in wages to cover his gambling debts.

    ReplyDelete
  120. Shawcross????

    You know what, maybe we misjudged Terry. Do you think if we all wrote him short personal notes of apology he might reconsider his retirement?

    things are trending downwards

    ReplyDelete
  121. apparently Terry woke up yesterday and Roy Hodgson was performing this dance ...
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UhQA-06kSLU

    ReplyDelete
  122. 2nd comment on that video : in scotland this is all just casual wednesday night banter

    Was that SWP jumping on Capt. Kirk's back at the end?

    ReplyDelete
  123. Reading boss Brian McDermott says he has been told that the Royals have been on the wrong end of key refereeing decisions this season because his players do not appeal enough. "My concern slightly, or more than slightly," he said "is the conversations with two people now; the match delegate at the Chelsea game said that my players didn't appeal for the (Fernando) Torres offside goal, and the fourth official said to my goalkeeping coach that only two of my players appealed (against Newcastle)."
    ======================================================

    What's going on here? Are the FA thinking that we're playing cricket all of a sudden. Match officials saying players need to appeal more to get decisions??

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. if true, then this appealing nonsense is the largest pile of bull crap ever mustered by teh FA.

      Delete
  124. If Alan Hanson died on the motd sofa how long before anyone notices

    ReplyDelete
  125. Managed to get past Colch by 1 solitary point. Currently number 1 in 2 of the 4 leages, and 2nd and 3rd in the other two. How awesome is A-HA! I should probably rename them A-HArcelona.

    ReplyDelete
  126. Perhaps that's it trott. They all died in 1987 and its only disbelief and the imperceptible flicker of the screen which lends them the illusion of animation

    ReplyDelete
  127. Oddly enough, I haven't seen it since the '88-89 season, coincidence?

    ReplyDelete

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