Friday 31 December 2010

Window Of Opportunity?

Transfer window time. Leave it open and the cold draft of Premier League reality blows through you and some poor chairmen start to eye the hard pavement beneath with some fondness.

Using the odd hunch, some inside information and a load of old bollox (in other words, the Lawro way) here's my thoughts on the January to come. And beyond ins ome cases.

ARSENAL
Having analysed where his young guns are going wrong, Arsene beefs up his midfield with three more Eastern Europeans, Arshicky, Roshavin, and Tippitappovich. He buys a new centre-back too – the Frenchman Laissez-Faire.

ASTON VILLA
Gerard Houllier welcomes Liverpool to Villa Park with a team comprised of baa-lambs. It’s a goalless draw by the way. Stephen Ireland, bought from Man City for £8 million (or £10 a sulk) is sold to WWFC (that’s not Wolves that’s Whoever We Fucking Can).

Delighted to be at Villa isn't he?

Gerard looks to invest in some proven goalscoring talent, but unfortunately Michael Owen damages a tendon while emptying the dishwasher and Villa continue to struggle in the wake of....

...BIRMINGHAM CITY
Alex McLeish decides against any reckless spending in January. Which doesn’t half piss off Mrs. McLeish. Birmingham City however are keen for more of a cutting edge upfront so they plump for a man who can always be relied upon to finish his meal, Yakubu.

BLACKBURN ROVERS
The chicken farmers rebut allegations that they know nowt about football after selecting their new management team of Glenn Cockerill and Chick Young. Out of retirement come Hen-ning Berg and Egg-il Olsen. After a good stuffing at Sunderland, and a bit of scratching around at home to Liverpool, the owners insist they are confident of success in the FA Coop.

BLACKPOOL
Ian Holloway is confident that Blackpool will survive the drop and the jolly Bristolian’s turd-polishing continues as new signings Chris Iwelumo and Ade Akinbiyi score twice each as the Seasiders end January by defeating Man United.

BOLTON WANDERERS
Owen Coyle’s incredibly white snarling teeth remain unexplained. But he continues to encourage his team to add Routes Two and Three – unless it’s twenty minutes to go and you’re a goal down in which case bung it up to Big Kev and cross your fingers.

CHELSEA
Ancelotti is pretty clear that he’s not going after anyone in the transfer window, although Chelsea have signed up four highly promising foetuses from under the noses of rivals Manchester United.

EVERTON
Selling Yakubu has removed several pounds off the wage bill and infinite stones off the bench. Moyes trawls the world for a reliable goalscorer and ends up playing Phil Neville up front with Cahill.

FULHAM
Sparky’s already mentioned he’s going to bag himself a new number nine until Zamora returns, and as luck would have it, Wayne Rooney becomes available. But Sparky says he’s looking for a goalscorer and opts for the laidback Roque Saga Cruise.


Roque in a familiar pose

LIVERPOOL
Woy is welieved of the weins at Wiverpoow and while the new owners search desperately for a saviour they install a temporary Messiah in the form of King Kenny Dalglish. It proves hard to sign anyone for the crisis club but even harder to get rid of people. (Apart from Reina who goes to Man United in a shower of Koppite saliva). No one seems to want Poulsen, Ngog, Lucas, Babel, Konchesky, Meireles, etc, etc....wonder why?

MANCHESTER CITY
Mankini goes from strength to strength. City put in a bid for Villa – that’s Aston Villa, the whole lot of ‘em bar Ireland. And Roberto is forced to pay thousands of pounds for new pipes and slippers for the front three of Balotelli, Jo and Adebayor. Plus of course the satnav tag for Tevez.

MANCHESTER UNITED
(Someone beat them for Chrissakes.) Fergie bags Beppe from Liverpool but sells Michael Carrick to a major department store’s shop window and Owen Hargreaves to medical science.

NEWCASTLE UNITED
Pardew is replaced in January by a plate of jellied eels. The eels look to improve the Geordies’ defence by stealing Jamie Carragher from Anfield in the hope that his presence will make Sol Campbell look pacy. In the meantime Ashley wins a high court injunction forbidding Andy Carroll to go within four hundred yards of Eastlands – or Harry Redknapp’s house.

STOKE CITY
Tony Pulis meets Mark Hughes for handshaking practice, which descends into an argument about who’s the most Welsh. Meanwhile Pulis buys ina bit more creativity to Stoke’s central midfield with the purchase of Vince Grella. Yep. Vince Grella.

SUNDERLAND
Steve Bruce’s team continue to beat the good’uns and lose to the bad’uns and so he too goes on the hunt for the manager’s holy grail – the goalscorer. Darren Bent is appalled until he realises that his latest hot streak has gone as cold as Aberdonian ice-cream and his team are shedding points like a hedgehog with eczema.

TOTTENHAM HOTSPUR
Well Spurs keep on putting a smile on everyone’s face. Arry tries to lure Carroll from Newcastle by offering a part-exchange show-pony in the form of Bentley or Krancjar. No one’s biting. Or elbowing. Or headbutting. And Spurs keep all eleven on the pitch for a change.

WEST BROM
Di Matteo is desperate to shore up his static defence and replaces his entire defence with four bags of cement. Fortunately Fulham are their first opponents and Andy Johnson is unable to find a way past the stationary objects and the Baggies win 1-0.

WEST HAM
Avram spends a fortune in the transfer window and by February the investment in the American genetic technology consultancy pays off when Grant picks all ten have successfully cloned Scott Parkers and the Irons win comfortably. Capello, by the way, doesn't fancy any one of them.

WIGAN ATHLETIC
Roberto Martinez’s scouts have been scouring the four corners of the globe once more and unearthed an Amazonian Indian with a sweet left peg, a Congolese forest pygmy who’s surprisingly good in the air (the obverse of Peter Crouch, effectively) and a Filipino nanny to help Charles N’Zogbia get his toys back in his pram.

WOLVES

Mick McCarthy keeps up his “nobbut middlin’” blather like he were some monosyllabic Dales farmer from All Creatures Great and Small. And no one comes. And everyone stays. And none of ‘em get any credit cos they’s just ever so ‘umble Wolves.


Reckon we'll mek it til end of May Mr. 'Erriot?

And in cricket, Graeme Swann explains that the reason for the sprinkler dance is that it illustrates how we pissed all over the Aussies. Tsk!

And I stick by my prediction that Chelsea win the Premier League. Somehow. It may be that Liverpool won’t finish third, Villa won’t end up 8th, or Blackpool 20th. In fact I reckon we can forget them ideas. Please.

Oh and the Boro?... erm...

Well Happy *!?%ing New Year to the rest of you.

284 comments:

  1. wow, you took your time! have a good christmas?

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  2. Happy New Year Robbo

    (....im dying of flu...)

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  3. Steve Bruce’s team continue to beat the good’uns and lose to the bad’uns

    ----
    theyve never been the same since they were bought out by that pakistani betting syndicate

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  4. Nice one Robbo, tho' as expected a bit lite on the blackpool front, I think that Holloway is excellent (forget the interviews which while fun ar not as important as the football played and is proving that while money is everything in football these days, that there is still a place for those who play with pride, NO FEAR and teamwork, where the whole is greater than the sum of the parts and playing attractive attacking football as well and not pulis/allardyce ball.

    Oh and happy new year all :)

    p.s not a backpool fan by the way (I'm a neutral)but if they keep on like this then I might have to consider a change.

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  5. Great stuff Robbo, highly chucklesome. There's a little wrinkle in the Bolton long ball tactics that has been missed by many. The long ball comes from Jussi after he's received a 40 yard back pass that nobody was prepared for.

    Blog, I wish you improved health for the New Year.

    May all your balls drop in a timely manner.

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  6. Laissez-Faire - does he play with Thierry Ennui?

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  7. Good stuff Robbo.

    Best wishes to all for 2011.

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  8. Anonymous said...

    p.s not a backpool fan by the way (I'm a neutral)

    ---
    Anonymous and neutral, what you hiding? ;p

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  9. I dunno what Lawro's using for his bollox predos but it certainly isn't inside info.

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  10. Star, I've been sitting here all day in a state of suspense awaiting your New Year's Honours list!

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  11. Oh shit, I knew I forgot something Trott.


    *clears throat*



    Well for the Cunt of Cunts award there can only be one winner, arise Cunt Blatter. You're not even fit for a place on the Council of Cheating Weasels, such are your crimes.


    Spurs gets the 'Kin 'Ell they actually did it' award for setting themselves a target and actually hitting it for once by getting into the Champions League.


    Webb gets the 'Unlucky Bastard' award for getting the short straw and having to ref a game played between a football team and a Kung Fu XI in SA.


    'Sore Loser, what a Wanker' award .... well I had Alonso nailed on for that after berating Petrov for doing his job at the Abu Dhabi GP, but Ponting has given him a good run for his money recently. Still Alonso.


    I'm still struggling to decide weather McNulty or Lawro should get the 'They don't know what the fuck they're on about' award. We'll call it a tie methinks.


    'The Irksome Tit' award can go to that Anon who reckons we're all bummers.


    And finally, the 'Utter Fuckwittery' award has to go to the BBC for shovelling Robbo and CC off of their site.


    There, I think that's all things covered, or the ones my flu and booze addled brain can still remember.

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  12. Good stuff Star.

    Cunts the lot of them, but couldn't John Terry get a lifetime achievement award?

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  13. Good blog Robbo, and nice awards Star.

    Wish one and all a happy new year.

    Remember, what you all did wrong in 2010 was, to drink too little beer, had not enough boinking and thought too much of your work mattered too much.

    Change all that.

    Drink, Fuck, Relax.

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  14. Thankyou all, you're far too kind :)

    Terry would have had the Cunt of Cunts award if it weren't for Sepp's late charge which made him look like small fry in comparison H.

    Terry cheated one woman and screwed another, Sepp cheated two good nations and fucked us all raw.

    Spit, that's fucking excellent advice mate :)

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  15. Sir Alex Ferguson has recalled two players to Manchester United from their loan spells at Preston after his son Darren was sacked as manager at Deepdale.
    Full story: Guardian

    ---

    He also informed them that he'd be taking his ball back home and if they caused trouble he'd tell his mum.

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  16. I still can't get over the fact that Wayne Bridge is earning well over 95K a week to do fuck all at City. Even for them that's silly money for a mediocre player.

    Mind the fact West Ham were willing to put up 95K of whatever the hell he earns a week seems equally moronic.

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  17. You're right about that Star, 95k a week for an average at best payer like Bridge is beyond ridiculous, but if it's only a percentage of what he makes then footy is just plain taking the piss out of us all.

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  18. H - i sw tthat story what appalled me is that preston NE might go out of existence if theyre relegated and the 3 man u players want to stay.

    so its wrong on every level
    1. itd vindictive
    2,its embarrrassing helicopter parenting of a grown man ("i should be your manager because, well my dads SAF and he can bung us some loan talent")
    3. it doesnt promote the best interests of those 3 young players and
    4.it might mean the end of one of the original clubs

    Star is it too late for SAF to make cunt of cunts?

    cheers trotts hope 2011 is good for you too mate and the same to all my online digital pseudo-buddies wherever you may be!

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  19. Blog, he offered to replace those 3 with Neville, Scholes and Giggs if they let Darren keep the job but Preston were holding out for Best, Law and Charlton (who they already had once).

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  20. My old Maths teacher was a die hard Preston fan. Mr. Greenwood, if you're reading this, I still fuckin' hate your team (all because of you).

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  21. I agree Blogs, it's a pretty sad state of affairs.

    Star, we demand a recount.

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  22. lol Recunt.

    Nah, Sepp's still the Cunt of Cunts but there's nothing stopping me inventing a new category.

    To SAF ... The Petty Meddling Twat Award is all yours mate.

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  23. Evening all. It's not only SAF that's recalled his players from Preston. Stoke have done the same thing.

    Hope all of you have a great New Year apart from Rockingham Rovers in the FFL who I'm up against tomorrow.

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  24. And also Cheadle Tractor Boys in the other FFL. But the I hope the rest of you all win

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  25. Spitfire said...

    Drink, Fuck, Relax.
    --------------------------------------------------
    Wasn't that the long version of what Frankie Goes To Hollywood told us to do? Adam will know.

    Fergie rules out any new signings in the transfer window. I think the bank manager ruled out any new signings.

    And a Happy New Year to you all. First day of 2011 and it's a scorcher.

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  26. G'day all

    Great stuff Star and I can't think of anyone more deserving of any of them, especially Blatter who, should you consider handing out a lifetime cunt of cunts award, he should be the first recipient.

    Col, if you don't beat me in the ffl then you have no hope of beating anyone mate.

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  27. Wayne Rooney has revealed he will go into management when he hangs up his boots and has already begun taking his coaching badges.

    I guess he will need at least ten years in order to gain them.

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  28. I wonder if lasers will find their way into English football stadiums. They certainly can create problems on the pitch, as the Indonesian national side recently discovered.

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  29. Morning all. Good stuff Robbo & hope everyone's had a cracking New Year's Party!!

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  30. Carroll is being shown as doubtful for the match. One player down already...

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  31. Great I've got him too SS11 ... he and Nani re doubts, Robinson (reserve keeper) is out and Huth's suspended.

    And there I was thinking I'd get XI out on the pitch for once ...

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  32. Garry Fucking neville has started the new year as being the cunt he's been for quite a while..

    gets away with a blatant penalty red card.

    O the reffs are shite as fuck.

    SSDY

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  33. Baggies only have themselves to blame... and the ref of course... Missed penalty, missed opportunities and another ref as blind as three mice... then again, look who they were playing... how many more get out of gaol free card's do they have at Un**ed?

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  34. Manu are certainly getting th rub of the green. Sign of champions when they win not plying well.

    Could see them going the whole season unbeaten if Rio+Vidic stay fit.

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  35. Foy was fucking useless to say the least.

    Just read Lawro's predos, he's up against Alan Davies, who reckons Fulham will smash six past Spurs (I know he's an Arsenal lad)

    Mind, given Lawro's got us down to win I think I'd rather bet on Alan's outcome lol.

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  36. I'm still putting money on United going unbeaten all season and losing the title.

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  37. Now you know the Ref fucked up royally when even Fergie agrees that Neville should have conceded a penalty.

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  38. WTF?

    Tevez starts.

    Boght him, he handed in transfer request, so I sold him. He plays and scores a couple. Then they said he's injured. so i sold him.
    I bought him again and he was rested. sold him and he's playing.

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  39. By the way, my opponent in the FFL has scored 0 points and is beating me by 1 point thanks to 8 penalty points deducted for transfers.

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  40. Well I seem to have brought Bent in at the right moment. no goals for ages and now he's in my team he finds the net :)

    Must remember to bring Adam back into the fold. Blackpool and Liverpoo play twice next week.

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  41. Mind I would have had Tevez in my squad if I could have been bothered to dismantle what I had to scrape together the money to get him in.

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  42. go ahead tone kick us while we're down

    2011 is going to be FUCKING SHIT

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  43. And Tevez fucks his peno up .... defo glad I didn't put him in now.

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  44. Blog

    Sorry about that 2-0 up and Vale down to 10 men, and my neighbour is a Vale man too, tho not quite as devoted as you

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  45. A 606 gem.

    -------------------------------

    Kevin Davies!!!!!!!!!

    The 'White' Heskey

    (No Offence)

    -----------------------------

    Well if I were Davies I'd be fucking offended. He scores goals, Heskey doesn't.

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  46. And Bale's scored for us.

    Strikers, who needs them?

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  47. So how come Torres stays on the pitch? I was under the impression that shoving your hands in someone's face like that got you an early bath.

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  48. Afternoon all. You'll enjoy this conversation I just had in my house today Star......

    Got Sky Sports News on and the half time results came up with the Premier League results on the screen in two places......

    Mrs Colch - "How can Fulham be playing two games?"
    Me - "WHAT?"
    Mrs Colch - "Well it says they're playing against Tottenham and against Spurs"

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  49. TrotterUSA said...
    PMT? SAF has the PMT award?

    ----
    Ha ha ha.

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  50. City now playing with three defensive midfielders.

    thats showing blackpool some well deserved respect.

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  51. 1-0 FT at the lane ... not the best game we've had but another 3 points and back to back clean sheets.

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  52. tone, that's all right mate. It's only a game. I suppose.

    (looks amongst Xmas debris for means of committing suicide.....beats self over head with Toffee hammer, fails, shoots self in head with party popper, fails, tries to drink self to death then remembers doctors orders....)

    what's that nosferatu the cat? January will see a renaissance in vale fortunes?
    We will be promoted in each if the following 7 seasons until we're playing in a super league of our own?

    Stop taking the piss you little feline bastard.

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  53. Fucking hell Gillingham are in the play off places now lol

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  54. And spurs are level on points with Arsenal, well for the next hour or so at least :)

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  55. And Stimmo's been sacked again

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  56. Scrappy first half at St Andrews. We are a bit fortunate that the ref didn't spot the van Persie handball, should have been a penalty.

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  57. Bo,

    the Ref has had a very poor game (not the first instance I am afraid. Or last)

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  58. Dont like the flow of this game.

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  59. Spit, in the two games I have watched this evening the ref has been shite.

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  60. I know this feeling, Arsenal gonna fuck this up and lose.

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  61. Ok, so that wierd feeling I had a moment ago must have been gas then.

    Never mind.

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  62. Lee Bowyer: Another one who has been a general cunt all around but received enough credit for it (red card, smack in th face etc)

    Also, the Birmingham fans: They did it last year when they chanted the name of Taylor on Eduardo's return and today they have been singing we love Lee bowyer has, how should I put it, 'bundled' an Arsenal player.

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  63. Finely balanced in the FFL between us H. 39 points a piece, you've Cole and Nolan to come while I've Nolan and Carrol if he's fit to play.

    Both teams somewhat fucked up by injuries though.

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  64. is Joe Cole as thick as maniche is bland?

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  65. was that the Charlton manager reffing vs col u?

    is Roy Hogdson a 1950s gentleman villain?

    what's this loan business about? are they properly registered or not?

    answers on a postcard

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  66. Is the vale slump in form since micky Adams surprised everyone by contemplating a job offer which pays more than pie money a case of Stockholm syndrome?

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  67. G'day all

    Lee Bowyer is the dirtiest arsehole playing football in England today and has been so since his Leeds days. He reminds me of a talentless Roy K***e. The scroat should be banned for life.

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  68. GNev would give him a run for his money there Bo. He reminds me of a talentless PNev.

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  69. Everyone excited for the Big Firm game in the SPL then?
    No.

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  70. I'd rather be watching the paint on my living room ceiling Spit ... if I could be bothered to paint it.

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  71. Good Afternoon!
    A clean sheet victory at St.Andrews, good start by Gunners in the New Year.

    Trailing Ngog by 6 pts in FFL, but I am confident to turn it around today with Drogba as captain and Essien yet to play.

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  72. Bloody Hell Bo - how much rain ya had?????

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  73. what happened to the january wild card? doesnt seem to have made its way to the FFL as yet.

    i dont know if i should be happy or sad at the win over the trotters. i really dont think woy is the man for the club. now woy will probably keep his job and do a fuck up with the january buys, unless that comolli dude can find another modric from somewhere.

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  74. Rain??? What the bloody hell is rain?

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  75. Wow seven yellows dished out at Villa already.

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  76. Now you know Chelsea are shit if HESKEY can score against them lol.

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  77. 3:3 an entertaining game and what joy b´to be had by the look on Terry's face as the 3 Villa goal went in after he had scored 3 Chelsea goal and thought he'd won it.

    Priceless.

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  78. Amazing last 10 mins at Stamford Bridge. Hope Drogba's goal was enuff to edge Ngog.

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  79. Typical, Drogshit scores now he's out of my team.

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  80. Well, unless Cashley racks up bonus points I've beaten H2H by a solitary point after substitutions. Leaving Nolan aside (as he's a sub on both our benches) he's getting nowt for Ridgewell and a point for Foley while I've got 2 points from Hangeland to come.

    Close game again.

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  81. I've squeaked through to the next round of the Cup by the looks as well.

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  82. I persevered with Drog as captain, just managed to scrape home as Carroll isnt playing for me and my 2 oppos

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  83. My maths must be off ... looks like a draw between me and H

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  84. another 3 game winning run for me..could well be ending that streak soon as its table toppin Spits up next for me.

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  85. Noone is gone to Albion...

    http://www.theargus.co.uk/sport/8763886.Albion_have_signed_a_real_gem/?ref=mr

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  86. OK Star.

    A draw!!!

    Fucked up, but fair result.

    Too many players (that wern't flagged) were out.

    Fuck the ffl!!!

    But much more then that.....

    Let's all laugh at Chelski!!!!!!

    Har di har ha ha!!!!!!!

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  87. I struggled to get a full team out too H.

    Oh well, hopefully the next week will put me back on track. I've got Adam back and made him captain.

    Why? Blackpool play twice, at home. Liverpool also play twice and having looked at both teams' stats Adam's the highest scoring player.

    Nothing like a gamble eh?

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  88. Tottenham will let striker Robbie Keane, midfielder Niko Kranjcar and winger David Bentley leave the club but only if the trio fetch £29m in the transfer market.

    -------------------------------

    Optimism defined, I fear.

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  89. SharpShooters XI 62 : 49 Ngog To The Top
    ------------------
    Yay!!!!

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  90. I drew 62 all with my opponent in Fantasy Cup, but I will go through the next round as I have got more number of goal scorers than him.

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  91. I got through to the next round by 7 points. not exactly a resounding victory but it's results that count not how I get them. (Fuck, that makes me sound like Big Sam)

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  92. http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/9333340.stm

    ----------------------------------

    Pah. Now will they start by sacking the hand that feeds them? Don't think so somehow.

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  93. Star, it's our derby match for this midweek games.

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  94. Well I've drawn against H and lost the 3 before that so I think you're the form team in our clash mate.

    The way things have gone for me in the H2H the past couple of months I'd probably be better off focusing on the Cup and the regular League.

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  95. Looks like the first move of the transfer window. And it is Man City, who else?
    ------------
    http://soccernet.espn.go.com/news/story/_/id/860414/manchester-city-land-edin-dzeko-for-L27m---reports?cc=5901

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  96. I just noticed that Spit's tweet made an official entry onto Sunday's Live text
    CallMeSpits on Twitter: "Re 1242. How about a straight swap? Houllier to Liverpool and Hodgson to Aston Villa?"

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  97. mornin Lads, hope you've all made it through in one piece.

    Is it still snowin'?

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  98. Morning Trotts.
    It's been very quiet since morning. I guess everyone's still in slumber... the hangover of the New Year parties is still heavy on their bodies.

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  99. bloody hell SS, has England been shut down?

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  100. Dunno about everyone else but I've had a horrible cold/flu the past few days so the moments where I'm lucid enough to hit the keyboard in a way that most of the words would make sense have been few and far between.

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  101. I've been drinking in the New Year....

    I think I'm almost there, hic.

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  102. ok, sick, drunk or abroad are today's qualifiers.

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  103. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  104. G'day all

    Not sure what Fergie's going on about here. A block of flats or a bonus for scoring goals... I thought that was pretty much par for the course and not excessive compared to the wages paid.

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  105. They want to reduce the SPL from 12 to 10 teams... why not reduce it to Rangers and Celtic, that will cut out the unnecessary travel, keep the glasgow fans in glasgow and ensure premium crowds every week... why have the other teams in it... could do a similar thing in the PL with Un**ed, Chelsea and Arsenal with a fourth position up for promotion and relegation purposes.

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  106. Less than 24 hours after Darren's sacking, Sir Alex had called back Preston's on-loan Manchester United players Ritchie De Laet and Josh King early. Then it emerged that United were also looking into ending the season-long loan to Preston of midfielder Matty James. Preston's chairman, Maurice Lindsay, said he was "shocked".

    Come Friday, Tony Pulis called back Stoke City's two loan players at Preston, Danny Pugh and Michael Tonge. Stoke insisted that they were simply covering themselves for a busy run of three games in eight days and no one will ever be able to prove otherwise. Curiously, neither Pugh nor Tonge were even on the bench for Stoke's win over Everton on Saturday

    Already bottom of the Championship, Preston, without James in their team, lost at home to Derby County on Saturday, their 14th defeat of the season. They are now six points from safety and without four key players. Relegation beckons. Cue the Nino Rota soundtrack and the cutaway to the lone figure in his darkened office nodding with satisfaction.

    You mess with one Ferguson, you mess with the whole family. The events of last week in the aftermath of Darren's sacking were a stark reminder of what happens to people when they displease Sir Alex. Ruthless? You bet.

    ___________________________________

    Just goes to show what great heart 'Sir' Alex and his stooges have.

    Pubis, Brusche, Bog Sam, .....

    What lumps of shite

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  107. And does any of our journalists or pundits have the guts to call the fucker out?

    Dont hold your breath.

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  108. G'day all

    I think you have summed it up pretty well Spit but I cannot allow this opportunity to pass.

    Once an arsehole always an arsehole and arseholes don't come any bigger than sir al.

    You forgot to mention his fellow countryman Spit, Alex the Leash.

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  109. G'day Bo.

    what riles me up and should rile the ever so 'umble 'fans' of the clubs like ManU and Stoke is how these managers of theirs are misappropriating the club assets, the players, for personal and family gains.

    Is it not financial corruption, fuck the moral implications?

    I think Blog pointed out last week that PNE are in danger of folding if they are relegated and being as they are one of the founding members of the Association and multiple Champions, it would be a real shame

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  110. Holloway2Holland said...
    Sir Alex Ferguson has recalled two players to Manchester United from their loan spells at Preston after his son Darren was sacked as manager at Deepdale.
    Full story: Guardian

    --------------------------------

    He probably only agreed the loans because his son was manager. If Preston had any brains they would have waited til the loans were confirmed and in place before dismissing them.

    Also both Fergie and Pulis may have doubts that whoever comes in will actually play the players that they have loaned them.

    and it's a brilliant bit of revenge.

    Seriously though if losing 3 loan players and releagtion is going to send PNE to the wall then questions should be asked of the business management of the club as PNE were poor last season so they shoudl have factored this possibility into their business plan.

    Also sending players on loan to help out mates or relatives is not missappropriating assets if they are not going to be playing in the 1st team as it means they get experience and their wages are either off the bill or greatly reduced saving the club money.

    I would not want PNE to go under but if they do it isn't Fergie or Pulis' fault but bad business management as it's not like Fergie Jnr had spent a lot of money in tranfer fees over the summer

    ReplyDelete
  111. its the old trafford cosa nostra, spit. he bullies tthe media and other managers, and the lower league clubs havent got the clout to stand up to him. he even tries to bully the bbc. i think he's gone mad actually..

    its a cartel - the cowering underbosses "Pussy" pulis, "fat" sam, steve "juniour" bruce and the rest of his criminal gang with SAF as boss of bosses, head of the crime family, he is the Untouchable with a barge Pole, Sir Alex is The Tractor

    this was the mob who turned up outside rooneys house in hoods making death threats. this is the crew responsible for most of britainscrime and corruption operating under a cover of massive publicity

    ReplyDelete
  112. increasingly the bigger clubs hoover up all the local talent (how can preston compete?) and then find themselves reliant on loan signings at the whim of the local big club don.

    cant be right.

    i think quite a few smaller clubs will struggle to survive the economic tightening of 2011. if vale ever get promoted its likely to be because half of div 1 and 2 have gone bust.

    ReplyDelete
  113. There should be some way of ensuring that local clubs can get some of the local talent from schools but howe many of them ever bother looking at college and university teams where there are often players who are good enough to play professionally but for one reason or another weren't picked up when they were 7 or 8 by a local club.

    I played with some excellent players at University who were outstanding when we won the Universities version of the FA Cup but you never saw league scouts at those games and there were players there who could have made the grade

    ReplyDelete
  114. http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/teams/i/ipswich_town/9336205.stm

    ---------------------------

    So Ipswich are doing shit because no good players want to commute out there ... didn't seem to be a problem in the past.

    Well one point for coming up with an original excuse for being shite at management.

    ReplyDelete
  115. Phew! Sachin vs Steyn at their best.

    Little Master scores his 51st century with a huge SIX amidst terror and mayhem caused by Steyn and Morkel's deadly swing bowling. Breathtaking, worth watching.

    ReplyDelete
  116. Some good news ahead of tomm's clash. Spaniard David Silva and Balotelli is out.
    ----------
    http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport2/hi/football/eng_prem/9331164.stm

    ReplyDelete
  117. And some more... the punishment Lee Bowyer deserved.
    ------------
    http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport2/hi/football/teams/b/birmingham_city/9337014.stm

    ReplyDelete
  118. SS11 said...

    And some more... the punishment Lee Bowyer deserved.
    ------------
    http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport2/hi/football/teams/b/birmingham_city/9337014.stm


    ----------------------------

    What, death by kicking in the bollocks repeatedly?

    Oh, maybe not then.

    ReplyDelete
  119. http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/teams/c/charlton_athletic/9337377.stm

    --------------------------------

    Another knee jerk sacking.

    ReplyDelete
  120. They are 5th and sack the manager - are they Southampton in disguise

    ReplyDelete
  121. according to a poll of almost 5,000 Scottish supporters by Supporters Direct.

    The majority of those responding were against to a 10-team league, with 88% opposed to the idea, while nearly half want a 16-team league and 27% favour 18 teams.
    ---------------------------

    So naturally it will be a 10 team league so that Rangers and Celtic have to play less games to win it

    ReplyDelete
  122. If it goes down to 10 teams they might as well dig a grave and bury Scottish football Adam.

    They need a bigger league, not smaller. Some competitive teams might be nice too.

    ReplyDelete
  123. Scottish Football died years ago, it's only the two Glasgow teams that are keeping it artificially alive in a semi zombie state.

    A bullet to the head of either of those teams would end it all.

    ReplyDelete
  124. Tottenham are targeting Uruguayan striker Luis Suarez, with his club Ajax believed to be looking for a fee of £17m.
    Full story: the Independent

    ------
    Should add a bite of "bite" to your attack, Star.

    I hope not though, he really is a prick.

    ReplyDelete
  125. I remember you warning me H. Well that's transfer article #2 for the face palm list. The first being talk about bringing Beckham to the Lane.

    ReplyDelete
  126. In other words, a has been and a has biten.

    ReplyDelete
  127. Tottenham winger Gareth Bale credits cross-country training for turning him into an iron man.
    Full story: Daily Mirror


    Well, that and nicking Robert Downey Jr's metal costume.

    ReplyDelete
  128. Starfire said...
    If it goes down to 10 teams they might as well dig a grave and bury Scottish football Adam.

    They need a bigger league, not smaller. Some competitive teams might be nice too
    --------------

    2 Divisions of 24 teams everyone plays each other twice and the winners & runners up get promoted along with the play-off winners (just like League 2)

    ReplyDelete
  129. A young goalkeeper hanged himself after his fiancée left him for his team mate - who is John Terry's older brother.
    Dale Roberts, 24, killed himself after his 25-year-old partner Lindsay Cowen had an affair with his Rushden and Diamonds team mate Paul Terry.

    Lindsay left Roberts in May after Terry slept with her while staying at the couple's home.

    ----------------

    Wonder if JT learnt from him or the other way round. Just shows the whole Terry family are scum (cheating on their wives, or nicking someones girlfriend, nicking stuff from Tesco or selling drugs) I hope Chelsea supporters are proud of their captain and his clan cos they are the only ones who would be

    ReplyDelete
  130. Blackburn make a move for AC Milan playmaker Ronaldinho by offering a deal worth about £20m over three years, reports BBC Radio Lancashire.

    Hahahaahahahahaha! Chickens? more like cocks!

    ReplyDelete
  131. Man Utd quartet Wayne Rooney, Rio Ferdinand, Edwin van der Sar and Gary Neville all sit out tonight's match against Stoke City.

    -------------------------------------

    Bet that's fucked a load of FFL teams up ...

    ReplyDelete
  132. Star,

    the transfer deadline for this game weeek is still open

    ReplyDelete
  133. G'day all

    SS, a three match ban for Bowyer is not enough... as I said the other day he should have a lifetime ban slapped on him.

    I agree H2, Scottish football has long been dead... the death knell rang with the forming of the SPL.

    ReplyDelete
  134. I see the bum buddies are opposed tonight, guess fergie feels safe leaving half his team on the bench.

    ReplyDelete
  135. Why not Bo? Pulis has left Pennant and Fuller out of the team.

    ReplyDelete
  136. NemanjasDisciple on 606: "I'll be even more optimistic and predict that in the Premier League's three games tonight we will see four home wins, 13 goals, three red cards, 16 yellows, a 10 of hearts playing card and a West African Giraffe."

    ---------------------------------

    Sounds like an action packed evening if that comes true.

    ReplyDelete
  137. Pulis has left who and who out of the team? are they the ball boys Star?

    ReplyDelete
  138. Fulham's Pantsil will be suspended for a couple of games when the video committee look at today's footage... dirty sod didn't attempt to play the ball.

    ReplyDelete
  139. Fulham 1 Foster 0 at the cottage.

    ReplyDelete
  140. Nobody spotted the deliberate mistake there I see... Fulham 1 Carson 0.

    ReplyDelete
  141. In his career, Lee Bowyer's got more yellow cards than any other player. might it be possible to put all those cards together into one sheet of wrapping paper and post the little wastrel off to, I dunno, North Korea.

    ReplyDelete
  142. Hoof Hearted, still chucklin'!

    ReplyDelete
  143. What have the North Koreans done to deserve that little shit... put him in a high security prison and let Bubba look after him for a while.

    ReplyDelete
  144. Starfire said...
    Man Utd quartet Wayne Rooney, Rio Ferdinand, Edwin van der Sar and Gary Neville all sit out tonight's match against Stoke City.
    -------------------------------------
    Bet that's fucked a load of FFL teams up ...
    -------------------------------------
    True, that's fucked up my team the most giving you some advantage, i guess... He could have left out Vidic as well then.

    ReplyDelete
  145. Ohh wait, I am leading by 4 points.

    ReplyDelete
  146. Yup, you're beating me at the moment SS11. I got 22 from 3 players, though I'm seriously regretting losing my rag at Nani and lobbing him on the bench as he was listed as being doubtful yet again.

    ReplyDelete
  147. It is all Fergie's fault. Misleading young budding managers of FFL...

    ReplyDelete
  148. Are we bored - yes we are

    where is everyone?

    ReplyDelete
  149. Here i am..rock you like a hurricane.
    Sorry about that..just had one of my old Scorpion CDs in the car today.

    Looking forward to the gooner-citeh match today. mouthwatering. and hopefully the Pool can do 2 on the trot and turn over the chickens today.

    ReplyDelete
  150. Would it be totally tasteless for me to wish your lot hit Venky's plaything Right Between The Eyes AH?

    ReplyDelete
  151. AnfieldHopeful said...
    Here i am..rock you like a hurricane.
    Sorry about that..just had one of my old Scorpion CDs in the car today.

    Looking forward to the gooner-citeh match today. mouthwatering. and hopefully the Pool can do 2 on the trot and turn over the chickens today.
    ----------------------

    Those CDs are a disgrace - some synth-pop would be great like that psb fella's always going on about.

    Woould love to see the chickens get stuffed as they haven't got a clue and teh Ronaldinho thing was a complete joke

    ReplyDelete
  152. Afternoon all.

    What do our resident Spuds (and the rest of ya) think about this whole Beckham malarky?

    Can a 35 year old circus attraction really be good for the LWC's or is it just a publicity stunt. I really can't see the upside for Tottenham, except maybe selling a few limited edition shirts. (to go with their limited edition DVDs ;p)

    ReplyDelete
  153. I've been saying for a while that I see no point in it H.

    I mean right now we've got Bale and Lennon on form in on the wings. VdV playing 'in the hole,' Modric's picking out pinheads from 60 yards away with his passing right now while Jenas and Palacios are doing the defensive/ dirty work just fine in Huddlestone's absence.

    Who out of that lot are going to make way for a 35 year old who's good with a dead ball but otherwise knackered?

    ReplyDelete
  154. I like Beckham but Harry would be better off treating David Bentley a bit better and giving him a chance rather than getting Becks in.

    Also too much risk of Beckham picking up an injury ruling him out of MLS games.

    He is better off having a proper pre-season with LA Galaxy teh way Landon Donovanm is planning to.

    ReplyDelete
  155. Star, No matter what 'Arry says (he would give the players a boost, etc, etc) I can only see this backfiring. You've argubly got one of the best midfields in the PL (almost as good as ours ;)) and I can't see how old Golden Balls would fit in. It's not like American Football where you can bring players on and off for set pieces, so I just don't see the point.

    Plus the team looks happy (Undercover Gallas isn't doing his job properly........YET!!) Bringing in Sideshow David and all the extra media hoop-la that inevitably comes with him could be a destructie influence in the teams harmony.

    Good luck, I hope you get him. ;p

    ReplyDelete
  156. Adam.

    David Bentley deserves everything he gets. I'm amazed that Arry hasn't dumped him ages ego, sorry, ago.

    ReplyDelete
  157. maybe he just needs teh right manager. he and robbie Keane would be well served moving as they are nevre going to get a proper go at Spurs with the team playiong so well without them

    ReplyDelete
  158. Bentley might be smart to move down a level or go to a smaller club in the PL, can't see his ego allowing either to be honest.

    Keane has had a good innings at Spurs, personally I never really rated him and I thought Spurs had pulled a business masterstroke by getting so much for him from L'pooh.
    I couldn'd believe it when they bought him back, even if it was less then what they'd sold him for it was still way too much.

    Verdict; Send Keane back to Wolves and DB back to B'burn so they can both relive the glory days.

    ReplyDelete
  159. We brought Keane back because we desperately needed a proven striker at a time when we were up shit creek without a paddle.

    At the time it worked. He came back, slotted right back into the team as if he'd never been gone and got some crucial goals to help us get out of trouble.

    Last season though it became clear his best days were behind him, well for us anyway though he had a good run at Celtic so all the best to him wherever he ends up.

    Bentley though, for the most part has been a whinnying mouthy muppet. Remember the Emirates last year? He made a big spiel about being back in the team and wanting to thump Arsenal but turned out to be a hothead who was lucky to have stayed on the pitch for more than 10 minutes.

    Ah well, let him move on too, and Kranjaer if he's not happy these days. Can't blame him for wanting to play games instead of warming the bench.

    ReplyDelete
  160. Two care related analogies.

    Bentley: true to the fact, is in fact a Volkswagen with a pretty face. A show pony with some talent but without application or commitment.

    I remember him urging the likes of Walcot, Wilshire and Gibbs to move from Arsenal if they ever want ot succeed because Arsene Wenger has no interest int heir development.


    Secondly, England have a new sponsor, Vauxhaul. Which is apt considering Mercedes sposor German national team.

    ReplyDelete
  161. G'day all

    We used to have a non-alcoholic drink down under called Claytons, it had the appearance and taste of beer and was advertised with the catchphrase "The drink you have when you are not having a drink"... David Bentley to me is a Claytons footballer, he gives every impression of being the real thing whereas he is really just an unsatisfactory, expensive walking ego.

    ReplyDelete
  162. Arsenal going into tonight's game unchanged... although Fabianski injured his shoulder during the warm up but stays in the team.

    ReplyDelete
  163. I actually like the looks of Sczczesny.

    He gives a far calmer and assured impression than Flappihandski

    ReplyDelete
  164. Spit I'd put that down to the fact he's been #3 at Arsenal the past couple of years, watching the two ahead of him cock up on a regular basis.

    So when he does get a run out he's probably thinking 'Well I can't do any worse than those two pillocks at least.' And thus performs well.

    ReplyDelete
  165. for fuck sake arsenal, score a freakin goal already.


    making me nervous.

    ReplyDelete
  166. Also,

    I concede in the FFl this week.

    lets pretend this game week never happened.

    ReplyDelete
  167. can fucking believe it..........

    hit two posts within a second.

    ReplyDelete
  168. Arsenal did everything but score a goal. or a couple.

    We know how it ends, dont we?

    ReplyDelete
  169. Could be worse. Could be Liverpool. 2 down against Bwackburn fucking Wovers.

    ReplyDelete
  170. Great game so far... Should've been atleast a goal up by now. Perhanps playing at too high tempo. Anyways good so far... Goal is coming in 2nd half. Cmon!

    ReplyDelete
  171. Even chelsea are a goal down against wolves. Superb.

    ReplyDelete
  172. Could somebody please shoot Jo inthe head to put him out of his misery?

    many thanks

    ReplyDelete
  173. that Pakistani betting syndicate has lost the plot tonight ....newc 5 up hatrick by someone I've never heard of, lpool 3 down to chicken, chelsea losing to mick mcmousey...

    ReplyDelete
  174. Nine man ManCity defence winning the day, it seems.

    ReplyDelete
  175. one back for scouse by you know who but that won't save 1950s gentleman villain woyston

    ReplyDelete
  176. Chelsea, Spurs Liverpool lose where as Arsenal and City draw: somewhere in the NW of England and old man is having multiple uncontrollable orgasms.

    ReplyDelete
  177. Great penalty miss from Sir Stevie G

    ReplyDelete
  178. Wistening to Fwank Sinatwa on my ipod on the bench. The wywics to My Way awe vewy appwopwiate wight now.----- Woy

    ReplyDelete
  179. And when you wake up it's a new mornin'
    The sun is shinin' it's a new morning
    You're goin'
    You're goin' home.

    ReplyDelete
  180. Its a race between Woy,Avram and Gerard for the chop

    ReplyDelete
  181. Happy New Year All.

    My bets on Avram out first, then Avram then Ancellotti.

    Crikey I can feel the cold sweats coming on after 10 days of drinking, the four horsemen of the drinkalypse will be visiting me tonight I fear

    ReplyDelete
  182. Mostly, lets hope the four horsemen leave the horses outside to ease some of your troubles.

    ReplyDelete
  183. and how the hell have I gone up to fourth in the H2H. The team is doing better without me.

    Viva Tangerines!

    ReplyDelete
  184. I can only hope Spits, but I fear their not. I can hear their hooves on the stairs.

    It's payback time!

    ReplyDelete
  185. I meant Avram then Woy, not Avram then Avram. Crikey I have pickled me brain.

    That will be the West of Ireland family's fault

    ReplyDelete
  186. and fuck you too
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PSEYXWmEse8

    ReplyDelete
  187. not a bad day for footy for me...leading by 15 (couldve been 20 if st stevie hadnt fucked up the peno) against squadron and h2h leader Spits (with the pool v pool game remaining and each of us having adam and one scouser), and woy to be out on his year by tomorrow morning..hopefully he gets a decent job somewhere else and doesnt have to struggle through life with the millions in severance pay from nesv.

    ReplyDelete
  188. The aussies need 364 to make England bat again. Good job.

    ReplyDelete
  189. Overall a good game but disappointing result for Arsenal. But thats the way it is, got to deal with it and wait till Manchester Fuckinng United lose games and drop a few points.

    G'day all.

    ReplyDelete
  190. Hehe, I am trailing now by 18 pts to Star's team. Although I have Coleman sitting on bench to come and give me a few points later after scores are settled. Only way I can win this now is if Blackpool have a goal fest against Liverpool and DJ Campbell scores a hat-trick...

    ReplyDelete

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