Wednesday 5 December 2012

Le Fin, Arsene


Europe is a nice break for Arsene Wenger these days. He can toddle off to the mainland where his brand of possession football is highly regarded and, to a limited extent, successful (you might say he gets nice easy qualifying groups if you’re Mancini). Whether Athens, with its seething hordes of disenchanted people jeering at authority, felt any different from the Emirates is a moot point.

Part of the joy of football punditry these days comes in the form of the annual ‘Is it time for Wenger to hang up his puffer jacket?’ debate. It’s woven into the fabric of the domestic season like a Chelsea sacking or a ‘plucky newcomer to the top flight’. Or even the phrase ‘Mark Hughes is the early favourite to take over at Anywhere FC.’

It’s hard to recall quite when a Gunners team has been so roundly booed as the one that departed after being  beaten by Swansea on Saturday. It’s one thing to be overturned by a bunch of alehouse meatheads playing route one plebeian footy the likes of which wouldn’t look out of place on a windswept park in Northallerton (aka Sam Allardyce’s Bolton – YES I KNOW there’s more to Sam’s game than that, but not against Arsenal) – but it’s another thing entirely to be outpassed and outclassed by a bunch of no-marks that cost tuppence.

Of course Swansea have a wonderful player as their manager and he’s done brilliantly to move Swansea on from Rodgers’ team, even while losing the likes of Sigurdsson and Allen. It must be particularly galling for a Gooner to have to watch their latest costly imitation centre-forward when Laudrup’s wafting the cut-price PleasedTo Michu under their noses. Giroud, Chamakh – they’re not so much target men as targets. Of abuse.  

So is the writing on the wall for Wenger this time? Well you’d have to think so. He’s found a decent-ish centre-half in Mertesacker – whose name my mate Chris Charles always insists sounds like Mark Lawrenson saying ‘motor-cycle’.

And he’s bought a wonderful player in Cazorla too, but he does look like he’s been manufactured from Arsene’s Prototype For A Perfect Player. He’s dinky, neat, good feet, can’t kick it all that hard, really, but he's very good at keeping it and he's easy on the eye.

You wonder whether Arsene can see anything in any other type of player: Rosicky, Arshavin, Arteta, Coquelin, etc, etc. Most independent observers would tell you that Arsene’s glory years were underpinned by a couple of vital things: a defence that took care of itself (and which was largely assembled by that niggardly envelope-passer George Graham) and a couple of midfielders who knew how to tackle – Vieira, Petit, Gilberto, Flamini, Edu….

Good tacklers aren’t necessary if the opposition keep giving it back to you. Arsenal would have no problem against, say, the full England team. But if the opposition can keep it and all you’ve got are little scurrying tippy-tapsters who couldn’t remove a lollipop from a toddler’s grasp without a struggle then you’ve got problems.

It doesn’t help that Wenger seems resigned – Freudian slip there – resigned to losing his best players even if one of them is that annoying nerk Nasri.

Now many of us have admired the way Wenger set about the job of transforming a side that had built its former success on not conceding and bagging the odd goal by Ian Wright. God they were fecking boring that team. The football equivalent of Cliff Thorburn.

Wenger’s Arsenal flowed. It oozed quality. Upfront you had Thierry Henry rolling right-footers into the bottom right-hand corner like a master crown green bowler. Bergkamp must have come into this world feet first he was so adept with them. Anelka, briefly, was lethal. But if they got past you they had Keown, Winterburn, Adams, Bould, Dixon… central casting for the heavy mob.

Now, to be frank, Arsenal are just a bit prissy. And so is the manager. He talks of ‘desire, technicality, quality’ but the first one’s pretty much lacking these days. He’s always been offended by an up and at ‘em attitude to playing Arsenal. Sometimes he’s come across like someone whose night at the ballet has been ruined cos some oiks ran on and started congaing.

Yes football can be art, but not all art has to be beautiful. Or good. Or even art. In a perfect world, Arsene’s home ground would be the Gardens of Versailles and his team would play against eleven elegant water features. It feels to me like the game has moved on and left an old school romantic behind.

It’s lovely to stick to the old philosophies come hell or high water. It’s great to have a proper wage structure when Manchester City are paying obscene amounts of money to the pedestrian likes of Gareth Barry. But tippy-tappy and club loyalty are distant memories for most of us. Wenger should know that when his team lines up against Citeh, the club his feeds.

So it’s not now a question of whether he should go but how he should go. He’s an obstinate old so-and-so. It’s not going to be easy. But you wouldn’t want to see him sacked – cast aside like some Stamford Bridge dishcloth. There should be a dignified moving on. He’s brought them as far as he can. Stand in the middle of the Emirates, wave everyone goodbye. Not a dry eye in the house. Move upstairs to an ‘administrative role’.

And then, in a perfect world, nick Guardiola and leave Abramovich flailing around with Faffer Benitez at the helm…

Maybe not the last bit. But definitely, au revoir et merci, monsieur.

 

165 comments:

  1. Fuck Yeah! 2nd. Keegan

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  2. 3rd. Keegan......ok, now to read the blog.

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  3. What a lovely young man Keegan is!

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  4. "It’s one thing to be overturned by a bunch of alehouse meatheads playing route one plebeian footy the likes of which wouldn’t look out of place on a windswept park in Northallerton"

    Can't agree with the above statement Robbo, swansea play some decent stuff. More attractive than Stoke, QPR, Sunderland etc. (need I even add some more shite clubs)

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    Replies
    1. " but it’s another thing entirely to be outpassed and outclassed by a bunch of no-marks that cost tuppence."

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    2. Proving that quality can be bought on a tight budget. How much did arsenal pay for Gervinho, Arshavin, Giroud, Chamahk, Santos, Podolski etc??????? Arsenal bought close to £100million worth of shit. Swansea's entire team is probably worth about, let's say £20m. So we can thus deduce that arsene wenger is a TWAT!!!! and he rightly should piss off!!!

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  5. Excellent post Robbo. Would be sad to see Wenger leave but I too feel that he has taken the club as far as he can. Take a page out of Ricky Ponting's book AW and Fuckoff. Ponting realized he peaked a while ago and when he could not reach those levels again, he left.

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  6. On a completely unrelated note, Robbo, switch to a bigger and not-so-cartoonish font, will you? This thing is simply an eyesore.

    Cheers!

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  7. Yep, worst start to a season under Wenger, 5 points off top 4, quarter finals of the COC cup next week and in the draw for the next round of the Champions League.

    Let's sack him, he's obviously clueless.

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  8. A hardy annual,the "Wenger to go?" blog.

    His early work was superb,but Arsenal do seem to be in a constant form of limbo.Perhaps it is time for someone new at the helm.The question would be who?

    Hughes,Di Matteo,Keggie Keegle,Alan Shearer?

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  9. haha, good stuff Robbo. I reckon they're working on a different formula at Arsenal. make money, be good enough to keep the place full and don't worry about the silverware. If Wenger is on a profit share bonus, he's done well.

    Owen Coyle's available!

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  10. arsene gets on my wick but i'll get in to say this before the gooners arrive - the assumption is that aarsenakl havent been succesful. but arsenal dont have a mad oligarch billionaire at the helm, have a sound economic base which entails wage restraint operating somewhere this side of sanity and their principle success criterion is european qualification. by this measure hes been a great success. now the money it seems is starting to flow, and if wenger can buy big again as opposed to tippy-hobbit-tappy i cant see why on earth theyd want to get rid of him much as id like to see him go. mourinininininho would be more fun as a non-fan and didnt pep say arsenal were the only prem club he'd go to? maybe he will - not everyone is a prostitute to filthy lucre. yeah right.

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    1. or just after the gooners arrive maybe

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    2. Frankie Dettori is banned from racing until the end of the football season, he'd fit right in at Arsenal.

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    3. bilbo baggins will be available after the publicity dies down

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  11. Well said as always, Robbo.

    Happy to have Wenger step aside, as it gives Abramovich FUC (Fuck You, Club) another option for next season. Or later this one. Everyone short of Fergie is fair game.

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  12. The thing is, we've been punching above our weight for quite a while now and the only reason for this has been Wenger.

    The PL is a two-three horse race, he who spends wins, simple. Chelsea are European Champions, but only managed 6th place in the PL, major fail. Citeh are champions, yet finished rock bottom of a group containing a team who's best player is Ryan Babbel, per-lease.

    Man U bought our best player from last season, are top of the league, without really hitting form yet, winning by scoring more goals then they let in, which shows a great attitude if not a great back 5.

    Those three are in a league of their own and none of the others can compete with how much money they spend on player transfers and wages, the goalposts have not only been moved, they've been relocatated to a different galaxy.

    Arsenal have lost all their real stars to bigger wages elsewhere (bar a homesick Fabregas). You can't lose players of their calibre and still expect to challenge on all fronts, it's unrealistic. The next to go will be Theo Walcott who suddenly thinks that he is worth a ton plus per week and we´re mad that we´re not giving it to him. Did you see how he played Saturday? No? I´m not surprised, he was dire, a more cowardly performance you will never see, a hundred grand a week, fuck off Feo.

    Jack Wiltshere was out for just over a year, he came back into a team of strangers, a bunch of guys he's never played with, it's going to take time for them to gel.

    But unfortunatly time is a commodity that pundits (and some fans) are not prepared to give. You emphisis this point with your remarks about Giroud, a player that made only a brief appearance Saturday may I add, and one who's record in his first season is as good as if not better then the likes of RvP, Bergkamp and Henry, but let's not let the facts get in the way of a good arguement.

    Everything is not hunky dory at the Arsenal at the moment, but to blame it solely on one of the best managers to grace the PL is also a bit obtuse, there are many other factors that come into play, behind the scenes rumblings that have spilt over onto the day to day football business, no clarity of financial restraints, FFP restriction planning (Gazidis is sitting on the board of both Arsenal and the FFP comitee) and the list goes on.

    My main concern is that Wenger looks tired, unwell even. He looks like all the crap at boardlevel, plus the shit he has to put up with from the meeja and now a section of the fans is starting to take it's toll, I´m afraid he might conclude that it´s just not worth the hassle and walk. How hard do you think he´ll have to look for a job? They´ll be queing up around the block for him.

    If he does leave, who to replace him?

    Who´s available?

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    1. The Gooners can (and do) poach from smaller clubs, such as "a bunch of no-marks that cost tuppence". Laudrup?

      Spent yesterday have a tooth pulled then watching the Gooners. Hard to say which was worse.


      Jedi

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    2. Maybe you had to have your tooth pulled, but you choose to watch the Arsenal, I have no pity for you.

      I'd rather have mine all removed then sit through a Spurs game.

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    3. Konock knock whos there
      Dishwasher
      Dishwasher who
      Dishwasher way i used to talk before i had me teef taken out instead of washing a spurs game

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    4. You're forgetting the bogus dutch accent, I speak like that already. ;)

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    5. "winning by scoring more goals then they let in"
      --Generally speaking, isn't that how one avoids a draw or a loss?


      "they've been relocatated to a different galaxy."
      --LA does have the highest payroll in the MLS, but I don't think they can compete with the Premier League yet.


      "Everything is not hunky dory..."
      --Good, because I believe Dr. Dory is lined up as Chelsea's next manager if we don't win the Club World Championship.

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  13. FC Twente midfielder Leroy Fer has become a laughing stock among his team-mates after buying his girlfriend a £22,000 pet horse - only to find out she can't keep it as she lives in a block of flats.
    Full story: Metro
    ===

    Yeah, ha ha, very funny................

    Only one slight problem, it's about as true as it would be to say that Rafa is the adored by the Stamford Bridge faithful Chelsea Boss.

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    Replies
    1. be a different story if it was Bell's Ein Fat Zebra!

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  14. Times are strange when I find myself reading an Oliver Holt piece and agreeing with it;

    http://www.mirror.co.uk/sport/football/news/arsene-wenger-has-chosen-secret-honour-1472689#.UL8Am7ts23U.twitter

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    1. i dont think hes secretly honourable and taking a hit for the owners, H, although thats noble speculation; rather, if there is anything wrong at the club its a fair bet "I did not see eet"

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    2. He's not the first to put forth such a theorey. I'm not saying it's gospel what he writes and to be brutally honest he's not exactly a journo I put a lot of stock in usualy.

      But there have been mutterings from some (so called) in the know that Arsene has been "towing the party"for quite some time now.

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  15. Jacks I would like to apologise for not showing enough (OK any) sympathy when you had R*y K as manager but now totally understand how you felt...

    Ein Fat Zebra - I believe is an anagram of our new manager -and he will be known as such from now on, by me at least.

    Anyhow, I am very much looking forward to Chelsea thrashing Nordsjaelland 10-0 (9 of which to be scored by Torres) and then thanks to favourable result with Shaktar v Juventus going through to the next round. Obviously Abramavich will not be happy that we only won by 10 and will then sack the manager

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    1. In fairness to Rafa (and I may be the only non-Liverpool fan to write that) at least he has a reasonable idea of how to manage a team,unlike the bog trotting twat we had.

      If anyone should be to blame BHB,it's your owner.Is Pep,having seen what has happened to various successful Chelsea managers,likely to take over?I doubt it,especially as the Arsenal job will be available soon....

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    2. Be a nize fart is also an anagram of the unmentionable persons name

      Jacks I know trigger-happy Abramavich is very much to blame, I mean if he had the tiniest bit of patience whenever the team had a blip and stayed with whoever the manager may have been at the time, who knows we might well have won more trophies than what we have - rather than install the revolving door at the managers office

      Either way it does not alter my 'feelings' towards Ein Fat Zebra

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    3. Fair enough Bells.

      http://www.timeanddate.com/countdown/generic?iso=20130519T17&p0=136&msg=Days+until+Chelsea+get+rid+of+the+muppet+Benitez&csz=1

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    4. nice one Jacks!

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  16. Replies
    1. Don't be horrid Trotts .....

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    2. you can have Dougie Freedman next!

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  17. Robbo's point is not that Arsenal are doing it on the cheap (they have spent a good deal of dosh lately and have more to spend apparently), but that they have only bought in one type of player - tippy-tappy's who can't tackle. It might be a bit of a sweeping statement, but I have to say I agree with this assessment. OK, I know he has Ramsey and Wilshere, but they are in the Scholes mode of tacklers and will play every game (either through injury or suspension he he he).

    The only way you can make tippy-tappy work is to tackle your socks off when you don't have the ball - watch how quickly Barca get the ball back when they lose it (and where - usually right up in the opponents defensive third). That is the key to their dominance - they dominate even teams which can pass the ball themselves because they pressure straight away. If Wenger wants to copy that, he has to get people in to who will tackle and this is the point - he has had the opportunity, but not taken it and perhaps this is why a change is needed.

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    1. oops, should be Ramsey and Wilshere will NOT play every game - I am sure you worked it out....

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    2. Arsenal players brought in over the last two seasons;

      Arteta
      Santos
      Mertesacker
      Park
      Benyahoon (loan)
      Podolski
      Gerviniho
      Corzola
      Giroud

      Yeah, they're all made of tiki taki and they're all just the same.

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    3. For a second I thought that was the list of next month's Chelsea managers, but then I realized it wasn't long enough.

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    4. I'd like to congratulate Anon for knowing what Robbo's point is. I always liked it most when it was pointless.

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    5. Long enough or tall enough?

      He's quite big, isnt he?

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  18. Man Citeh the worst CL record of any English team, EVER.

    Chelski first holders to exit at the group stage, EVER. (and stuck with Rafa)

    Man Utd 0 – 1 Cluj (whoooo ?)But that was a dead rubber so doesn't really count.

    Arsenal in crisis

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  19. 6-1, 2 from Torres. If only we played in Norway, we might be on to something.

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  20. You think your owner doesn't back the manager? Unless you're a Chelsea fan, you've probably got nothing on PSG's Nasser Al-Khelaifi:

    "Today, Carlo is here," he told reporters on his way out of the Parc des Princes.
    http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/20616855

    Maybe something was lost in translation?

    Anyway, the article is about Pep v Mourinho. Maybe Rome-is-burning Abramovich will hire... BOTH of them! At the same time! Now THAT is something people would pay to see.

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  21. well done Celtic! Divin' twat Samaras secures a penalty for the win but of course they would have won anyway.

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  22. A player diving in a game involving Celtic? You dont say, the honourable Scots would have none of it.

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  23. Oh yeah, sack Wenger and get who exactly?

    Pep? And what would he do different with the current bunch of players at his disposal?
    Anybody got an estimate as to who much a Champion team costs? Would ask City but they dont know it themselves yet.

    Course the team is doing rather shit at the moment but the same 'experts' who are calling for Wenger's head were singing his praise at the start of the season after only a handful games where they didnt concede much goals.

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    1. What arsenal need is steel in defence and midfield. I'd say bring in Tony Pulis, Crouch would be sure to follow. Hit long balls up to crouch & have giroud or podolski play off him. Add Cattermole to midfield and Titus Bramble to the defence. The invincible mach II.

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    2. would it not be better for Pulis to stay wherever the fuck he is with Crouch, Catermole et al. and give them athe Arsenal player or two you need for your dream team /Invincible mach II?

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    3. But wenger has the funds to buys who ever he wants!Bottomline: HE BUYS SHIT! He cannot be trusted with the money available, he cannot be trusted to bring in players of quality. His standards have fallen! Me thinks Pulis can do much better!

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    4. Dont know that he is buying shit Keegster. Cazorla, Giroud and Podolski have all had z decent first season so far. He isn't unearthing the RvPs and Henrys anymore for sure, but who can keep doing that.

      Pulis?? Come now, that's just silly.

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    5. Cazorla's been excellent! The other 2 haven't set the footballing world alight, but you're right, their 1st season. Not a pessimist, but have this tiny suspicion that they might not improve. Stand corrected tho!

      BTW, atleast Pulis would spend less cash and still bring in simliar shit to AW. Would love to see Owen at the emirates!

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  24. Robbo turning out to be quite the wind up merchant. Last week he had hitherto silent Liverpool supporters coming out of the woodworks in support of Rafa, and this week he has the gooners churning out statistics. I wonder who it might be next week. It's been a while since the last ManU wind up blog, but then those fuckers aren't doing much wrong nowadays, and might even have Vidic back soon. Hopefully they get spanked in the Manc derby.

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    1. The man's a class act(Robbo). Best blog on the net. Wonder what's his thoughts are on Phil McNulty, David Bond, Tim Vickery and Dan Walker.
      Vickery is class too.

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    2. Cheers for that AH - your post has now made me involuntarily conjure images of Rooney & Ferdinand being spanked 'Max Mosley' style - that made my stomach churn nearly as much as seeing Rafa in Chelsea tracksuit

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    3. That's a very unpleasant thought, Bells (Rooney being spanked or Rafa in a tracksuit? make that 2 unpleasant thoughts). Actually, as a Spurs fan, I always like to see Rafa managing any of our rivals, or the Gooners in crisis.

      Reasons to be cheerful: festive season is upon us. Only 2 more Chelsea managers until Christmas.


      Jedi

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  25. Irish ladies played US ladies this week, televised here and good gracious, the Arsenal goalkeeper is a cracker, you Gooners been keeping her to yourselves. I'd never leave if I was Wenger.

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  26. Jedi:
    Reasons to be cheerful: festive season is upon us. Only 2 more Chelsea managers until Christmas.

    I've got it! Abramovich, Jew though he may be, is treating the Chelsea managers as an advent calendar! So how many more before we have a red-nosed bloke take over and lead us to many seasons of glory? I'd say until we had a man who could walk on water lead us to the perpetual promised land, but I think he was born in September... (A Jew in sandals, born in September, some loyal followers but whose preachings are often misunderstood... sounds familiar...)

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    1. Stephen

      Don't see the Govan Beetroot moving now.

      Have all the Gooners on here seen the comments their Commercial Officer Tom Fox (?) made? Seems to say that winning doesn't matter at Goonerville.


      Jedi

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    2. I think he was probably born in April actually but never mind

      As for Fergie not moving sign him to Southend for one last hurrah to knock West Ham and Colchester off their perches

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    3. I saw that Jedi, a stupid thing to say.

      Just goes to show that you should be careful what you wish for, Arsene wanted a fox in the box, now he has one in the directors box (dang fineprint)

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    4. Well, I thought it was very appropriate, given that the Gooners have spent even longer than Spurs since they last won a trophy.

      Sorry H2, can't resist it. I agree it was a stupid thing to say though.


      Jedi

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  27. Keegan.

    Having watched every game in it's entirity and not just a few highlights here and there, I would say that Giroud has had just a big an impact as Carzola. The little Spainiard is the kind of player the media love, he is adventurous, two footed and has the technical ability that English players (mostly) can only dream of,yet he has the tendency to drift in and out of games, he is either magnificent or meh. Giroud is continually being compared to RvP, lazy journalism, there's no way he can fill the boots of the PL's best striker, but every slip is greeted with "RvP would of scored that"ho fucking hum. Podolski has been dissapointing, but is still finding his feel. IMHO, Mertesacker has been our best player lately.

    Tony Pulis' arrival at the Grove would make Rafa joining Chelsea look like a ticker tape parade.

    Michael Owen????

    I'm not even going to dignify that with a hefty snort of derision.

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    1. Quite right H2: one big name striker past his best (Podolski) is quite enough.


      Jedi

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    2. Yeah, we haven't got the strikeforce depth that you guys have with Dafoe and Adebayor and, I'm tempted to say Dempsey...... but not with a straight face.

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  28. I'm not sure if picking out a few iffy signings is the point here (all managers have bought a duffer or two).

    I would suggest the point is do you see Wenger as the way forward,is he taking the club in the right direction.If you think so,stick with him,if not then get rid.

    As for the "who is there to replace him" argument,I would suggest plenty of people would be applying for the job.

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    1. Ofcourse you're correct Jack, we've been easily sidetracked.

      I'm personally of the opinion that Arsene should stay, what we need is a bit more transparity at board level.

      If there is indeed a war kitty, then AW needs to dip into it, if it comes out that there is more then enough available but AW refuses to use it, then I may have to reconsider my opinion.

      As for his replacement, ofcourse there will be no shortage of applicants, I don't see how that is really the point, all the usual subjects will be put forward, hell, Rafa will soon be out of contract too. It will be a poison chalice for whomever it may be,. They're some pretty hard shoes to fill. Maybe there's a new unknown PhD holder hanging around the J-League!?

      But this is all conjecture anyway because from now on we'll win every game and sweep all challengers aside. Gervinihio will be crowned Best Player ever, Podolski and Giroud will win the golden boot with Chamakh coming in a close second, Theo will sign a new contract taking a pay cut to the national minimum wage writing his fourth book "Footballer on a shoestring"in the process, RvP will beg to come back and we'll all tell him to fuck off and *Diaby will play five games in a row without collapsing,

      Well, if you're gonna dream..............


      *O.K maybe that one was a bit far fetched

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    2. Gervinihio will be crowned Best Player ever, Podolski and Giroud will win the golden boot with Chamakh coming in a close second...

      I can see all that happening... after they leave for Man Utd.

      Delete
  29. Oh fucking hell Rodgers, please not Sturridge. You could get Demba Ba for half that (rumoured) price.First Walcott now this. Why the mad rush for forwards out wide who can run really fast and then knock the ball out for a goal kick ? How about someone who can actually put it in the net?

    Another rumour on the LFC site has Xabi returning in January. Now, then.

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  30. Jedi, about those comments;

    Brand Awareness
    Ooooooh, The Sun do like to try and stir up a bit of trouble, don’t they.

    ‘OFFICIAL: ARSENAL DON’T NEED TO WIN ANY MATCHES’ barks their back-page headline, reporting words from the club’s chief commercial officer Tom Fox. A man with a much cooler name than his job suggests.

    Anyway, Shaun Custis writes: ‘It’s official – nobody at Arsenal is that bothered about the team actually winning games.

    ‘The Gunners’ chief commercial officier Tom Fox declared the “brand” was more important.’

    You’re probably way ahead of us here, but that’s not quite what Mr Fox said.

    He said: “Arsenal Football Club is not only about winning. We have a large and engaged fan-base around the world who want to feel as if they belong to the club, and want to feel proud to belong to the club. That’s my primary business…our brand is defined by more than winning.”

    So, he didn’t actually say the brand was more important at all. Just that there are other factors relevant to his job as commercial officer. Oh.

    He went on to say: “Obviously nothing instils pride in our fan-base more than winning.”
    Source mediawatch.

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  31. AH - Demba Ba isn't very likely as he'll never pass a medical when a transfer fee is involved (was a free to the Barcodes).

    Sturridge to be fair is a central striker who keeps getting shunted out wide rather than being like Walcott who is a wide man shunted out wide.

    David Moyes for Arsenal.

    SAVE RAFA

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  32. Sturridge gets shoved wide because he's shit in front of goal. For "shit" please read "his goal to good opprtunity ratio is way below the national average."

    Then, being shoved out wide he takes every opportunity to come inside and prove again how shit he really is by missing the chance he'd created instead of passing to somebody better placed to score. Until he plays for the team and not himself he'll be worthless. He thinks he's better than he really is ( a bit like Bendy in that respect).

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    1. Wait... are we talking about Sturridge or Torres? Oh, "shoved out wide", not "snubbed and cried"...

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  33. the problem arsenal have with wenger at the helm is his ebbing credibility - he no longer even looks like he particularly WANTS to win anything, let alone expecting to win - this baleful anti-enthusiasm undermines his ability to recruit and retain top quality players. he might stay but if he does then his team will continue to leave. a new manager may or may not stem the exodus (nasri/song/rvp etc etc...sagna will leave this year, theo will stay hes just fantasising hes top quality) by restoring optimism. crisis what crisisssssssssssssaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrgggghhhhhhhhhhhhh

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    1. Not sure that Sagna and Walcott will be such big losses as their agents seem to think.

      Wenger needs to sign some solid defenders/ defensive midfielder to regain a solid platform for his flair players to capitalise on.

      Shawcross and Hangeland would be an excellent partnership but I can't see Wenger buying a Stoke player under any circumstances but WInston reid at West Ham also looks a decent player but isn't very experienced

      Delete
    2. i suppose buying shawcross means he wouldnt break anymore arsenal players legs, except in training of colurse,adam, but perhaps theres too much water under that particular sturdy but grim 19th cnetury inductrial iron bridge ...i think he's also in for fellanio, the everton cock sucker, and the african alan partridge - Zaha!

      Delete
    3. They are so obviouusly the answer to Arsenal's defensive problems we must all be Luddites for not seeing it ourselves

      Delete
  34. Stuart hall arrested now.

    Does this mean we won't see any more repeats of the 1970s Blue Peter when the team was Peter Sutcliffe myra hindley and Fred west? It was a very strange decision to replace Patch with that fuckin werewolf.

    ReplyDelete
  35. Pregnant Duchess of Cambridge likely to be out of action until Christmas after leaving hospital


    How will we cope?

    ReplyDelete
  36. so she'll be available for the January copulation window?

    ReplyDelete
  37. Is the copulation window the one with the paparrazi zoom lenses trained on it trott?

    ReplyDelete
  38. it's the window that opens when morning sickness ends and "get yer fuckin' 'ands off me" begins. Certainly we'll all see the photographic record of events.

    ReplyDelete
  39. Wonder who Chelsea will sign in said copulation window.

    Better ask JT.

    ReplyDelete
  40. Taylor Swift says she can't keep men despite dating Harry Styles


    cause and effect I would say really

    ReplyDelete
  41. Mark Hughes to take over at the Emirates, with Jason Cundy as his assistant! You heard it here first. www.ballsack.com/shit/asshole/

    ReplyDelete
  42. Well you lot may mock with your Save Rafa campaign but it will be very shortlived as I believe that when the Chelsea squad arrive in Japan the manager will be identified as
    the very poisonous Rafa-Fish and be made into sushi.

    ReplyDelete
  43. BLUEHELLSBELLS7 December 2012 14:26
    Well you lot may mock with your Save Rafa campaign...

    Thanks Bells ... SAVE RAFA!

    ReplyDelete
  44. theres a funny smell in here has someone left the copulation window open?

    ReplyDelete
  45. http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/20639295

    Aww, that means he won't be on the bench with his suit and shin pads.

    ReplyDelete
  46. Robbie Savage says the time has come for Arsene Wenger to leave Arsenal.
    Full story: Daily Mirror

    Another reason we have to keep him.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I can agree whole-heartedly with that! Robbie Savage has got to be the worst of the ex-footballer pundits these days(Lawrensen and Hanson don't count as ex-footballers anymore!)

      Delete
  47. Two different ways to celebrate the season of giving;

    Everton's Steven Naismith, 26, is paying out of his own pocket for Christmas dinner for homeless people in Liverpool. The Scotland international is sponsoring the meal at the Whitechapel Centre, a charity that works with people sleeping rough, living in hostels or struggling to manage their accommodation.
    Full story: Liverpool Echo

    Didier Drogba, 34, hosted a dinner to present his Chelsea team-mates from last season's Champions League final victory with individual rings to commemorate the triumph - at what is thought to be a cost of around £800,000 to the player.
    Full story: Independent

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's nice to see someone taking the effort to give something back to societies misfits.....

      It's a nice gesture from Naismith too.

      Delete
    2. An excellent gesture from Naismith. Hopefully many others in his profession will follow his example rather than Drogba's

      Delete
  48. Lobster Thermidor would be the Rafa delicacy of choice Bells.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh no, that rings bells from the dark and distant past that was the BBC blog - but cant remember why!

      Delete
    2. A Tommy Onions post to nne Mr JDR, comparing his moaning at Robbo to going tp Mickey D's and being annoyed that Lobster Thermidor was not on the menu.

      Know your classics. ;)

      Delete
    3. Oh yes ! Cheers for that H2H.

      Where is JDR when you want the mood lightened .......

      Delete
    4. He was on the cricket and rugby blogs last time I saw him.

      BTW that video can still be found on Youtube. I love the bit when he says he will get a sense of humour and one of the secretaries starts crying and the older one says don't worry he didn't mean it.

      Total classic

      Delete
  49. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M-vWr8zr588&list=FLX8z77LjdzAQjfikI5rnXuw

    and there it is! Classic.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Fuckin hell that was just awesome. You're a celebrity Trotts..you have your name on a Youtube video second only to Gangnam Style in viewership.

      Delete
    2. That was hilarious... I read the blog back then but I didn't regularly read any of the comments and never participated. Not that I've brought anything to the table, but I never realized until I started in that this was where the fun was. Robbo creates; we run amok with it.

      Delete
  50. aye well, no fuckin' interviews or Lobster! It's an honour to be mentioned in there actually, I miss Joe and the banter from all those lads and the others no longer with us. We should wear a flat cap in their memory one day next week (or sumat).

    ReplyDelete
  51. Still makes me chuckle, classic Gaz.

    ReplyDelete
  52. Ha ha its the fights i miss (but not much)

    ReplyDelete
  53. On a similar theme I'm reading about the causes of ww1 and I wasn't surprised that it actually started in a pub in Munich, queen Victoria nudged kaiser Bills elbow when he was getting a round in and he said
    Do you want some
    And she said
    Are you starting
    And he says Let's take this outsideand in the carpark it got out of hand and led to the invasion of Belgium
    that was just the trigger of course the underlying cause was a road rage incident when Victorias phaeton carriage cut up Bill on his prussian charger and then she laughed at his duelling scar...

    ReplyDelete
  54. On a similar theme I'm reading about the causes of ww1 and I wasn't surprised that it actually started in a pub in Munich, queen Victoria nudged kaiser Bills elbow when he was getting a round in and he said
    Do you want some
    And she said
    Are you starting
    And he says Let's take this outsideand in the carpark it got out of hand and led to the invasion of Belgium
    that was just the trigger of course the underlying cause was a road rage incident when Victorias phaeton carriage cut up Bill on his prussian charger and then she laughed at his duelling scar...

    ReplyDelete
  55. Looking forwards to the referendum on the Union in 2015 and bearing in mind the discovery of 17 times more gas than there is in the North Sea sitting under blackpool with the Tower being converted as a giant Rig as we speak I'd just like to say....

    Fuck off Scotland.

    ReplyDelete
  56. http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/20639295

    No Terry in Japan? Who will lift the trophy?

    (Oh, that's right, Corinthians...)

    At least now the trip is safe for Brazilian WAGs.

    ReplyDelete
  57. Trotts, can you dig up a video clip of this?

    http://blogs.golf.com/presstent/2012/12/truth-rumors-marc-leishman-stands-by-caddy-after-brawl.html?sct=hp_t2_a15&eref=sihp

    Not that would make me watch more golf. By which I mean any golf at all. I suppose I understand why one would play or maybe watch in person, and I did volunteer at the PGA event in Charlotte (won one year while I was there by one Rory McIlroy--though my job there didn't involve actually being near the golf itself), but watching on TV? What's the draw, unless there's a chance of caddies fighting?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. no and if there's no video it didn't really happen!

      Delete
  58. Well I'm fantasy fucked again, and not in the way we all dream about. I had Fletcher at captain since Sunderland play twice. I tried to change it this morning when I saw he was still doubtful but it was locked, and now he's not starting against Chelsea. Not that I thought he'd score in this one, but then again, who wouldn't? Other than Torres, I mean.

    ReplyDelete
  59. Really????

    http://www.offthepost.info/blog/2012/12/uefa-5th-official-practices-how-to-use-his-eyes/

    ReplyDelete
  60. Only 12 more shopping days to Doomsday.

    Personally I like all these eschatological disaster predictions i think they spice up Christmas Easter midsummer etc etc etc but is the gamblers fallacy tho...the doom merchants think that the statistical chances of getting it right are improving over time but,
    except in the case of arsenal this is actually not the case

    ReplyDelete
  61. 2 goals and an assist from Nando. Colch, I assume he is no longer your captain.

    Trying to figure out which one is worse - ManU winning their 20th or Rafa getting his first with Chelsea? Not that the latter is very likely.

    After 4 long weeks at the summit of all 4 FFL leagues, I will be off the top in 2 or possibly 3 leagues this week, unless Sterling and Enrique grab a hatful.

    ReplyDelete
  62. it's all a bit tragic if you're getting knocked off the top perch AH, but these have been cracking good games today!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Indeed Trott.

      The Manc derby will be the main talking point though, especially as Ferdinand headed an object into the home crowd while celebrating the winning goal in front of them, naughty.

      Seriously though, not the smartest place to go celebrate, but I hope the cunt that threw whatever it was gets brought to justice. I wonder if it was that geezer who was having to bev held back? I'm sure we haven't heard the last of it.

      Delete
  63. Bloody hell..4 points from 4th place despite having to play a threadbare team with the inexperience of Shelvey, Suso, Wisdom and the general ineptitude of Hendo, Cole and Downing. And goals and assists from Cole, Downing and Hendo in the past few games. Also managed to top the your-hopeless group having Anzi and Udinese. This Brendan dude might just know a thing or two about managing. The key though is winning the next 2 games against Villa and Fulham at home.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. 4 points seperating 4th from 12th.

      It’s gonna be an interesting festive period with the games coming like Aaron Lennon. (thick and fast)

      Delete
  64. Manchester City striker Mario Balotelli's agent has revealed that the Italian hires taxis to lead him to meetings outside Manchester to avoid getting lost.
    Full story: Sunday Mirror

    After the way he played today he should pay someone to help show him the way on the pitch, because he sure did look lost.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Tevez perhaps. Balotelli could stay on the bench and watch.

      Delete
  65. http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/20661031

    If anyone can score fourteen goals is three matches...

    ReplyDelete
  66. Mo Farah, Mo Problems? See paragraph 2.

    http://radiochris.tumblr.com/post/36662250368/golf-olympic-sport

    I knew the UK has a drinking culture, but I didn't realize it ran this deep. Could have something to do w his Bugle affiliation. (Those gents are to politicosatirical BS podcasting as Robbo is to sports blogging.)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. that's nowt Stephen. Lots of people get carried away when watching sports after a few pints in a crowded pub. When Red Rum won his third National I heard a bloke shoutin' that he'd go down on him! The fact that he'd put the wife's housekeepin' on the nose was probably of some influence as was the gallon and a half of Greenalls he'd supped in the prior 3 hours.

      Delete
  67. Tragically its changing now. Pubs closing. Beer taxed beyond affordability. Keep fit fanaticism. Even the first signs of a healthy diet on the horizon in which your 5 a day does not refer to Pints of Old Peculiar . They ve even closed the bar in my fire station. When the puritans win and England becomes a sober healthy happy sensible country we may as well pack up and go home to enid fuckin blytons 1950s devon and commit mass suicide .

    ReplyDelete
  68. Only 11 more shopping days until Doomsday.

    ReplyDelete
  69. Math obviously not Brendan's strongest suit -

    ""The first 25 minutes, we were outstanding, some of our play was great and it was capped off with a great goal by Glen Johnson.And then all of a sudden, for the last 30 minutes of the first half we stopped playing."

    (No wonder the players looked a little jaded at halftime).

    ReplyDelete
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