Tuesday 15 February 2011

Loony for Rooney?

St. Valentines Day. Bloody hate it.

It's one of them Christian-Capitalist conspiracies that blackmails you into chucking your wallet at naff poetry and furry fluffballs with embroidered hearts dotted all over them.

I once went out with a lass who was dead narked that I hadn't got her any make-up for Lovers Day. The poor mare had read somewhere about the St. Valentine's Day Mascara, she said. Any man foolish enough to fall for such a load of cods deserves to have his bank account reappropriated (unless he's a customer at Allied Irish in which case that's probably already happened).

If you've bought owt like this in the last couple of days you are a twat. Fact.

I mean if I want to be romantic with the missus then I'll do it on me own time not when Clintons Cards tells me to. She'll tell me it's nice to be presented with a thing of beauty on the 14th Feb so I took her down to the lounge and let her watch Rooney's winner v Man City over and over.

Although I have to confess, Wazza's moment of acrobatical wonder was his only contribution to the game. And it can't disguise the fact that the rampaging ogre-boy of 2004 is a distant memory for most of us.

United continue to blunder on to the title without ever looking convincing. One thing's happened in the Blue Bell, mind. For a few years now we've referred to a needless snippet of greenery on your food as a 'Nani'.

Sprig of parsley on your fish pie? That's a Nani. Mint leaf on your vanilla ice cream? A Nani. If Man United were a tasty dish, Nani was the unnecessary garnish. Not any more.

When they go forward, Portugal's Wacko Jacko Looky-Likey (during the Billie Jean years, before Michael started to want to look like a waxwork of Diana Ross) is now very much the chunky beef in the steak and ale pie. (With Vidic the hardy topcrust pastry you have to struggle hard to get through).

Nani's finish for United's first goal had the lazy ease of a Greaves. Indeed Wazza can count himself well bleeding lucky to be on the pitch given that The Languid Bulgar is in tiptop nick and Speedy Gonzales can't wait to get off the bench.

Javier Hernandez - another of them feckless fat Sombrero tossers for the Top Gear team to get their lazy hands on.

I'm not doing down the goal Rooney scored. My cliche accumulator tells me that it was: a Derby game. A Six-pointer. It deserved to win any game. But his every other touch was that of a man with kapok-covered boots.

So why the Sunday paper gush? (Apart from the opportunity to use 'Roo' in a dozen headlines. And that overhead kick saved his bacon otherwise I'm sure one of them would've come up with 'Roo-matic'.)

Could it be that the Man-Child that led England's Euro 2004 bid cannot be forgotten. That we're so desperate to revive that a kid so hirsute that he must be a genetic hair's breadth away from Richard Keys, we'll grab on to the first sign of that resurrection to prove that England's only world-class forward is back?

It's uncomfortably reminiscent of your Lawros and Hansens purring every time the creaking Michael Owen taps in a three-yarder. "'E's a goalscorer, Gary." Er, yeah. He's also got hamstrings with all the robustness of cheese straws thanks to the likes of Houllier running his little calves into the ground before he'd all growed up.

Owen of course was a 17-year-old wunderkind too when he, for the first and last time, scored a goal having picked it up over ten yards away from goal. (It may sound like I'm sniping but that's still six yards further out than Lineker.)

But that golden boy is so far off the teenage terror that he's now a Fool's Golden Boy. And despite Rooney's latest terrific tonk I'm thinking he's in the same tarnished boat.

The Jesus pose by the corner-flag can't disguise the fact that not that long ago the Old Trafford saviour was more than shuffling his avaricious little pegs across Manchester with all the speed and grace of an Egyptian dictator skipping town.

WR: "At least we don't play for them no-marks across town." CT: "Yet!"

Given the aforementioned Chicharito and Berbatov, Fergie might well see the close season as his big chance to get shot of the Scouser and cash in. He doesn't normally faff about, does he?

Certainly Rooney's a long way off joining the really big names. Like Ronaldo. I mean the retired Brazilian one. (Although let's face it, the idea that the lardbucket only just retired is as laughable a notion as the idea that the Big Society has been thought through.)

Such is the preponderance of flesh about Ronaldo in recent times it's difficult to recall how lethal he was when on song. The two goals in the 2002 final when the bloke had his haircut the wrong way round will live in the memory for a while. (Not least cos a piss-poor German team somehow stumbled to the final to face them.)

Wearing that merkin on his scalp was said to prove how confident the lad was feeling during the tournament. Maybe. Nevertheless, history will not instantly recall the fleet-footed assassin of that final, nor will it trumpet his record of 16 goals in World Cup Finals (unsurpassable unless Blatter's ugly reign leads to a year-long tournament that involves 128 countries - and it coyld happen). Instead history may remember a truly great footballer as the fat bloke with the bad barnet who cried off in 1998.

Too much Ronaldo at McDonaldo's methinks

I pray that Rooney is remembered more fondly.

464 comments:

  1. Bollocks. I wanted that cheery! :P

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  2. Wonder how long it'll be before Ronaldo opens his own chain of pie shops.

    He could go into partnership with RBA. Ronaldo has the money, RBA has the vision and the nous to pull it off.

    It'll solve his employment woes to boot.

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  3. Thirst!!

    Well, not really, I drunk enough over the weekend to last me a lifetime, well until at least eight o clock this evening anyway.

    ---
    Nice Blog once again Mr R.

    It was indeed some goal by Rooney, but the national jizz-fest with the rolled out "he's back to his best" crap is tedious. I also agree that SAF should cash in during the summer. Old Beetroot face is showing his age, a few years ago he would never of stood for all the shit that Roo has pulled. He got rid of Ruud van Horseface in a flash, and he really was a world class striker with a goal scoring record to prove it.

    Anyway, after all the hoopla, it turns out that the goal was a shinner. (Dixon you cock)

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  4. Bloggy.

    That Coca Koala sounds delicous, I can bearly wait to try it.

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  5. I think your summation of United blundering to the title is a little harsh. There have been plenty of games where they've been the best team and not any where they've been the worst team. As far as I can remember anyway. Their worst game was against West Brom and didn't deserve to win but they didn't deserve to lose either. Just because they're not slaughtering teams doesn't mean they're not playing well.

    Arsenal have "blundered" more in my book. The home draw against Man City and that unbelievable concession of the lead against Newcastle are two of several examples where the "Barca of the EPL" haven't really cut it. I expect them to drop away very soon.

    Man City for all their forward power have very little in reserve if plan A (10 men behind the ball and catch them on the break) and plan B (individual moment of brilliance e.g. Tevez, Silva) don't work. The worst game of the season by MILES was the manchester derby at Citeh. United were the away team so played cautious which is understandable. Citehs mentality was not. They will draw too many games and fall way down the table me thinks.

    And poor poor Chelski. Looks like they'll need to spend way for than 70 million to get things back up and running. They've still the best 11 in the league so I'd expect them to finish second by the end of the season.

    End of season Prediction
    1 - Manchester United
    2 - Chelsea
    3 - Arsenal
    4 - Spurs
    5 - Liverpool
    6 - Citeh

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  6. Oh yeah, this goals ten times better than Rooney's goal.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6PsCic5WlMM

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  7. Manchester City centre-back Joleon Lescott has revealed how he tried to get immediate revenge on Wayne Rooney after the Manchester United striker's stunning overhead kick won Saturday's derby - and failed. Just hours after the Old Trafford match, the England team-mates went head-to-head again - at computer game Fifa 2011 on the Xbox console. While there was no repeat of Rooney's spectacular strike, the forward did come out on top once again.
    Full story: the Sun

    ----
    They were lucky John Terry wern't there, he's the PL's Xbox champion.

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  8. Ok, I enjoy your articles Robbo, but I'm afraid you're talking nonsense about Rooney.

    Yes he had a bad game apart from the wonder goal. But to say he hasn't come on since 2004... errr where were you last season?!

    He hasn't had a great season, but he's still been one of Man United's best players. It's clear to anyone that he's world class and a far more complete striker than the raw talent we saw in 2004. Anyone with half a footballing brain can see that.

    I'm a Newcastle fan btw, so no bias here.

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  9. G'day all

    Good blog Robbo. Take no notice of Rod, he's a bit biased when it comes to the red side of Manchester.

    Rod, you are right mate, Chelsea will finish... behind Arsenal.

    Rooney is a world class arsehole but just a good striker.

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  10. Excellent blog as ever ROBBO, and agree Shrek should be on his way at the end of the season, but where to? wont go abroad, hes still got English to learn, if he goes to citeh, his house will get torched, does anybody else want him?


    Arsenal to top MANU thanx to CFC

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  11. Kin Hell, Tractorboys running riot 5-0 up away at Donny

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  12. @Starfire: ronaldos the only footballer who can eat a pie through a tennis racket

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  13. The wonder goal so-called was a fuckin FLUKE he shinned it

    No denying manus resilience but they are about to become the worst tram ever to win the pl - they're a fuckin pub team

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  14. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  15. jeez Gattuso head butts Joe Jordan he'd only just got round to replacing those teeth n'all

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  16. Rooney's goal? I have seen better goals.

    He shinned it. Fluked it. etc. etc.

    well done the Spurs.

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  17. Mornin' Lads, Good stuff Robbo. Sounds like you got naff all from your lass. Join the club, although there might be a promise fulfilled tonight.

    Back in the day Joe wouldn't have shown such restraint. Congratulations to Star and the Spuds. Another famous victory.

    Spurs v AC Milan one night, Bolton v Wigan the next, footy, can't beat it.

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  18. A win and another clean sheet. Gattuso's going to miss the return leg anyway because he got booked so there's no point me starting a campaign to get him banned for the match.

    Pissed off with the fact we've figured out a stable defensive set up only for that cunt Flamini to damn near break Corluka's leg though.

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  19. On the plus side of that, it's good to see Woody back on the pitch and playing again.

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  20. i give him 3 weeks star - should be enough to see corluca back from the clash with the milanimals (sun)

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  21. Morning all.
    Great blog Robbo! Enough said about Rooney, he's just over hyped... even to this date he gets nominated for PFA Young Player of the Year award by the ManU loving media.

    Ronaldo (the retired one!) - 16 goals in WC and his absurd hair cut... Is that all you remember? I have great video collection of the Ronaldo of Inter Milan and Barcelona more than the one played in yellow jersey of Brazil. He was simply the best in rounding off the keeper and putting the ball in the net. Awesome. (AND BETTER THAN ROONEY's OVERHEAD KICK... any given time and day...thats a bet!)

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  22. Well I've had a few days away from the computer, and in this part of the world, that means away from football too. It's been tough, but I've made it through. Things I've noticed from football since the weekend:

    1) Rooney's goal. It was good, but calm the fuck down you pricks in the press (I'm looking at you McNulty). He's been shite ever since Taggart played him with a broken foot, cos he had no other good players. He's since held the club to ransom and got what he wants, played shite for his country, and pissed on a wheelie bin. Hardly the second coming is it? It was no better than Trevor Sinclair's overhead a few years back, and certainly doesn't beat David Silva's no-looking finish from the weekend.

    2) Spurs are immense!! Sandro was great and looking more and more like the player that the club were desperate to sign last year, Lennon made the AC defence look 50 years old, oh, hang on, a great finish from Crouchy (he has a good touch for a tall bloke etc etc). Even Asso-Ekotto played very well. But even more impressive for me, was the way we've won our last three Prem games 2-1, and had to scrap for the wins. Performances that would never have happened a few years back. If we win our game in hand, then we're 3rd in the table.

    3) FFL. What the fuck is it all about? My team is in freefall. When I look at my team, I have the highest scoring keeper, 3 of the 4 highest scoring defenders, three of the top 4 scoring strikers, and 4 of the top 8 scoring midfielders. But only one of them midfielders is fit. I'm playing a 4-1-3 formation, and it's not getting me many points.

    4) Chelski have gone shit again.

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  23. http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/eng_conf/9398401.stm

    ------------------------------

    Nice to see one of the local teams get fame for all the right reasons lol ...

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  24. Ohh and well done Spurs. Good away win, one foot firmly in the quarters now. :)

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  25. Big one tonight... All the right vibes and positive notes coming from Wenger in pre match conference. This makes me even more nervous. I hope they are not going for this as a do or die match. Just play normal game and hope for best result. Guardiola would be happy in a way to be playing Arsenal, as everyone knows Arsenal never play defensive or “park the bus” stragtegy… if it was some other team then would have been possible since Mourinho showed last year - how to get a result by parking the bus and counter attacking…… I hope it would be an entertaining game. :)

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  26. I'm really not sure how Arsenal are going to stop Barca defensively. Mind I was saying something similar about Spurs before last night.

    Well you've got RvP, Cesc and Walcott all fully fit and on form this time round so you should be able to hurt them as badly as they can hurt you with their stars.

    I just hope Chesney plays a blinder tonight, he's going to be very busy.

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  27. The latest graduate from the Paul Scholes School of Tackling:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cmg2ZQo30fg

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  28. Arsenal need to hope they don't get thrashed like at the Nou Camp last year or it could affect their league form and carling cup final chances

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  29. SS11 said...
    Big one tonight...

    Indeed SS, Wigan and Bolton tonight.

    mornin' all.

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  30. Morning Trotts,
    Bolton to qualify for FA Cup next round ;)

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  31. the really big ones friday night with the Messiah returning from injury v bradford. it might look like mikey adams left and vale crashed and burned in fact our top scorers been injured since just after christmas

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  32. Gattuso head-butted Jordan after Tottenham beat Milan
    •Agent claims midfielder was called a 'fucking Italian bastard'
    ___________

    and?

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  33. Jordan, after having continuously heckled him, insulted him with truly low phrase, saying 'Fucking Italian bastard'. For one like Rino, who has a strong sense of his Italian identity, I think this is the most disgusting and unjustifiable of insults."
    -------
    Rino???? Rino!!!!! that explains the short sighted charge and head butt

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  34. another match winning performance from Joe Jordan. legend.

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  35. youre talking to yourself again

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  36. no, its ok, im schizophrenic. youre never alone

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  37. roses are red
    violets are blue
    im schizophrenic
    and so am i

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  38. Blog, you're doing your best to take it to comments page #2.

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  39. blogdignag said...

    Gattuso head-butted Jordan after Tottenham beat Milan
    •Agent claims midfielder was called a 'fucking Italian bastard'
    ___________

    and?

    ---------------------------------

    Ah, so that's what was meant when they said they were speaking Scottish.

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  40. Ah so, that's what was meant when they said they were speaking Scottish.

    -------

    are you japanese, star?

    SS- i post from a phone mate so i wouldnt no

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  41. Arsenal will get properly thrashed on home turf. you heard it here first.

    (Actually you heard it everywhere already)

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  42. Anon - hmmm is that a friendly or a sinister wot wot you never can tell with these anons like marooned ww2 japanese snipers on pacific islands they all look alike and you dont know if theyre going to carry on a war thats over eg he shinned it! or walk smiling onto the beach hand outstretched in friendship or - worst case scenario, gattuso like come over shake harrys hand next to you then WHOP! head but in the recently purchased false teef

    Agent Orange! Agent Orange!

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  43. im off, ive got a beach to plough

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  44. Well done to the Spuds, a famous victory.

    How Gattuso stayed on the pitch is beyond me, Flamini should of gone too, that was a horror tackle. It was all so bad that by the end I was actually rooting for the Tiny Tots much to the amazement of the bar and even more so myself. UEFA better get this right when handing out sanctions, Gattuso needs to be banned for quite a few games a la Drogba otherwise once again the "double standard" questions will be raised.

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  45. Don't worry H, I'll be cheering the Gunners on later on.

    I mean, if we both get through and get drawn against each other in the QF, what a London Derby that would be.

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  46. As for Arsenal v Barca tonight, I 'm just looking forward to a good game of footy. I read Nasri's fit, if it were up to me I'd start him from the bench, but AW will probably put him in the starting XI.'
    We'll miss Sagna (our best defender this year) but they'll equally miss Poo-hole. IMO, whoever controls the centre of the park will win the game. Xavi, Iniesta and Biscuits v Song, Jack and Cesc. Should be a good-un.
    Barca are such firm favourites that Arsenal really don't have that much to lose, there's no shame in being knocked out by arguably the best team on the planet, maybe this can work in our favour.

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  47. Indeed Star, but I'd prefer we meet in the final. That would be the derby to end all derbys.

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  48. Alright, I am off and will be watching the game from my friend's place at night.

    I predict a goal draw. Fingers crossed.

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  49. Why would we want a goal draw, SS11?

    My figers are well and truly uncrossed.

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  50. Holloway2Holland said...
    Indeed Star, but I'd prefer we meet in the final. That would be the derby to end all derbys.

    ____________

    I am in favour of ending Derby too (if they are unable to be separated from Robbie Sewage)

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  51. A bit harsh, anon, although I'm sure many will think the destruction of Derby would be a small price to pay for ridding the world of RS. ;)

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  52. Holloway2Holland said...
    As for Arsenal v Barca tonight, I 'm just looking forward to a good game of footy. I read Nasri's fit, if it were up to me I'd start him from the bench, but AW will probably put him in the starting XI.'
    We'll miss Sagna (our best defender this year) but they'll equally miss Poo-hole. IMO, whoever controls the centre of the park will win the game. Xavi, Iniesta and Biscuits v Song, Jack and Cesc. Should be a good-un.
    Barca are such firm favourites that Arsenal really don't have that much to lose, there's no shame in being knocked out by arguably the best team on the planet, maybe this can work in our favour.
    -------------------------

    Just get Song or Diaby to man-mark Messi and stifle him play with 1 up and a 4 man midfield

    I would go 4-4-1 with whoever is marking Messi just to follow him all over the pitch and take him out of the gamne

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  53. Holloway2Holland said...
    A bit harsh, anon, although I'm sure many will think the destruction of Derby would be a small price to pay for ridding the world of RS. ;)
    --------------------------------

    I think the destruction of Derby is a laudable aim in itself

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  54. ohhhh Barcenal tonight is it, so that's the "big" game. Figers crossed is ok H, just don't get your fingers crossed, you might spill something.

    blogdignag said...
    Gattuso head-butted Jordan after Tottenham beat Milan
    •Agent claims midfielder was called a 'fucking Italian bastard'

    eh, less of the "fucking" - Joe should've asked 'arry to hold his specs.

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  55. Glaswegian kiss, italian style

    Pick on someone your own size, idiot

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  56. Adam, Diaby probably won't make the squad, let alone the team and I can't see Song as a man marker.

    Maybe we can get Gattuso on loan for the night to man mark Messi, when I say man mark I ofcourse mean nut him, that should take him out of the game.

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  57. TrotterUSA said...

    eh, less of the "fucking" - Joe should've asked 'arry to hold his specs.
    ----
    Shame Arsene wasn't there, I've heard a lot of people mentioning him having something to do with specsavers.

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  58. OK ready for a long night in the kneipe across the road
    HSV v St Pauli (another derby) followed by

    Arsenal v Barca

    Go Gunners
    Go St Pauli

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  59. Have a good-un Tone, I'll check out the AaDerby down in the bar.

    I repeat your sentiment;

    Go Gunners
    Go St Pauli

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  60. Trotts, it looks like you were right, not only do you spill stuff, but looking over my last few posts it seems that typing also goes to shit when you have fingers crossed.

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  61. Does the C on Gattuso's armband stand for choker?

    http://news.bbcimg.co.uk/media/images/51284000/jpg/_51284644_throat466.jpg

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  62. http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/olympic_games/london_2012/9399361.stm

    -------------------------

    Erm, yeah.


    West Ham, the stadium's all yours. Rather you lot fly into that shitstorm than us lol.

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  63. a spot of de frigging is called for, ahhh the romance of the cup, good luck to your teams, especially in THE big one on Friday. Up the Vale!

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  64. Gunners! Excuses at the ready!

    Just kidding. them barcalonians are getting a superiority complex and need cutting down to size. they'll be tiny

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  65. cheers trott. Good luck vs wigan should be a good match.

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  66. trott some cultural advice, please

    these shit American teen dramas zak and cody etc... why do they all speak (an think) like mickey mouse? is there a nationwide ,problem with helium leakage?

    is American air 50% helium, 50% lard vapour? whayts going on over there? and why is tiger woods president?

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  67. I would go 4-4-1 with whoever is marking Messi just to follow him all over the pitch and take him out of the gamne
    ==================================================================

    Bloody hell Adam, we are the underdogs as it is, you want us to play a man short from the start too.

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  68. BojanglesOfOz said...

    I would go 4-4-1 with whoever is marking Messi just to follow him all over the pitch and take him out of the gamne
    ==================================================================

    Bloody hell Adam, we are the underdogs as it is, you want us to play a man short from the start too.


    -------------------------------

    Meh, I suppose this saves Wenger from fielding the now near obligatory ill disciplined pillock who'll do something dumb and pick up a straight red ;)

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  69. I think we're average a sendoff one in three games Star, so you are on to something there.

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  70. The O's had another good away win the other night against MK Dons... takes them to within three points of the playoffs and more importantly ten points from the relegation zone.

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  71. Since the new year, the O's have played 11 won 7 drawn 3 lost 1... the one loss came on January 1st... so ten games undefeated since.

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  72. can't see the Os winning their challenge v west ham in the Olympic stadium, Bo

    Hearnes right it will kill them. after123 years ... not right

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  73. They have no chance from what I can make of it blog... it will be a sad day for football if the O's are forced to close their doors, they being the second oldest club in London after Fulham.

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  74. The gunners are not out of this just yet. They have to desist from trying to play the offside trap against Barca though otherwise the Catalans are going to pick up another goal or two.

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  75. barca greatest team ever? the sophistication of their perpetual motion, the finesse of touch its the art of the only just possible operating on the finest of margins - clichy was 6inches out of position for their goal - beautiful breathtaking football

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  76. but arsa not out of it yet on the break

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  77. If we have to get knocked out of the CL I would rather it be at the feet of Barca than any other team.

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  78. Evening all. Barca might be a bloody good football team but they don't half roll around on the floor like a big jessie whenever someone dares to tackle them.

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  79. With the pressure that Pep Guardiola likes putting on the officials from his technical area he'd be the perfect replacement for SAF at Old Trafford.

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  80. Get in there. Poor goalkeeping but who cares. Come on Arsenal. Another 1 or 2 in the next 10 mins and you've got a real chance in the 2nd leg.

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  81. come on Ye gooners wilshrte

    Evening colch.

    2-1!!!!!!!!!!_

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  82. kids all awake me cats run off got a bit excited

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  83. Evening Blog. I'm loving watching this. Especially as I bet on Arsenal to come from behing to win, more than 5 yellow cards and barca to be leading at half time and arsenal to win the match.

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  84. col u v spurs this w/e colch




    under10s

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  85. Put your money on Spurs then Blog. Our Under 10's are shit. But not quite as bad as our first team.

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  86. great game. Only half time tho

    colch your under 10s are fuckin brilliant. i'll let you know who wins

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  87. A good result for the gunners. I thought Koscielny played out of his skin tonight. A great peice of goalkeeping from the young Pole at the end... could easily have taken out Pedro(??).

    A great goal from van Persie... although the GK shouldn't have been beaten on the near post like that... I get the feeling he was expecting VP to centre the ball.

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  88. The world is a happier place this morning.

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  89. well done that man who said at half time arsa can still win it on the break oh it was me

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  90. Your perceptive powers are beyond reproach blog.

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  91. Roma 2 - 3 Shakhtar Donetsk, there's an unexpected result.

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  92. I take back what I said earlier. Pep Guardiola would not be a good replacement for SAF. Pep seems happy to talk to the media even when they lose.

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  93. Pep would be no good at Un*8ed Col... the team only respond to the hair dryer treatment now, anything less and they just wouldn't function... I don't see Pepi kicking football boots around the dressing room mate.

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  94. As I said earlier
    Go Gunners
    Go St Pauli

    Both won
    Arsenal v Barca 2 very skilful teamds, joy to watch

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  95. Starfire said...
    On the plus side of that, it's good to see Woody back on the pitch and playing again.
    ------------------------------------------
    Spurs defender Jonathan Woodgate suffers injury setback.
    Woodgate had not played since November 2009
    Tottenham centre-back Jonathan Woodgate has strained an adductor muscle in his left leg, a scan has confirmed.
    -----------------------------------------

    Oh dear Star. Looks like you spoke too soon.

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  96. Yessssssssssssss!

    OK, it's not over by à long shot, but I'll be drinking for tonights victory..

    H2H, on iPhone live from the bar.

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  97. It' belongs to the missus Bo....

    She's not gonna be happy that you called het à yuppie.

    Luckily I won't tell her. ;)

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  98. bloody 'ell. How did that happen?

    Well played, the gunners. Cesc was not his usual best but stayed back to help out in defence, so did Walcott who was great in the beginning but tracked back to win the ball on numerous occasions. Nasri didnt look as sharp as of late but did the job with discipline.

    Song: Brilliant, yellow card was harsh.
    Djourou+Koscheilny+Czesczesney well done.

    RvP, missed a couple of sitters that might have made for a frustrating evening had he not scored a blinder.

    for me, the man of the match, ever sovereign, ever composed and ever more lethal, Jack Wilshire.

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  99. And i know messi had a perfectly legal goal disallowed for offside but I wont fret on that one since they have dani alves in their ranks.

    what twat.

    ReplyDelete
  100. Wilshire is the new Brady.

    there, I said it.

    ReplyDelete
  101. Spit, I don't think you are doing Wilshire justice, I think he will be better than Brady.

    ReplyDelete
  102. I hope so , Bo. I sure hope so.

    But for now, a Brady in the middle would do just fine.

    ReplyDelete
  103. Wilsh E re,

    well done gooners.

    Just another typical ho hum mid-week footy night, Barcelona and Wigan lose!

    Blog, he's president because it's a step up from vice. The voters did well to pick him ahead of Donald Trump, Mickey Mouse or the Bart Simpson helium filled ballon from the Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade.

    ReplyDelete
  104. What a cracking game from 2 great teams. Personall though, I thought Bolton were slightly better. The Barca-Gooner game wasnt too bad either.

    ReplyDelete
  105. wot you on abaht potatohead will shear dont look nuffink like karen brady

    ReplyDelete
  106. actually he does. and have you noticed theyre never seen in the same room togther at the same time? some freaky cross dressing as shrill media harpy football exec going on there i reckon

    ReplyDelete
  107. anyway, now that the lesser games are out the way, we can focus on the important events that the Europa League has in store for us all.

    ReplyDelete
  108. Holloway2Holland said...

    It' belongs to the missus Bo....

    She's not gonna be happy that you called het à yuppie.
    ==============================================================

    H2H, I never called het a yuppie.... don't even bloodywell know het... but if it is gonna upset Mrs H then I withdraw my comment.

    ReplyDelete
  109. AH, a man that can so completely and accurately sum up the whole evening of football in one line (as you did) demonstrates a rare and valuable talent.

    ReplyDelete
  110. A great morning if you are Gooner fan!!! What a win last night... Excellent team performance.

    Wotsit Chesney made great saves, Koscielny and Djourou defended as if their lives depended on this game. Wilshere was amazing in his ball control and pass distribution. RvP & Arshavin scored the important goals. We need to take this opportunity and once again come up with a big performance at Nou camp. It will be tough, but not impossible.

    Come on Arsenal!

    ReplyDelete
  111. what if, in summer, barca come in with a bid for Wilshire in place of fabregas?

    could happen.

    ReplyDelete
  112. It's not likely Spit but if it happened I would hope Arsenal would give them a resounding NO in response... sell them Fabregas for 80 mil though.

    My reason being... Fabregas is going to go there some day... and Wilshire is more likely to be loyal to Arsenal... and he may prove to be better than Fabregas in the long run.

    ReplyDelete
  113. I dont think today is the right day to discuss who might go or should join Barca next summer. Let's hope we have Vermaelen fit in time for 2nd leg at Nou Camp.

    ReplyDelete
  114. Former Arsenal striker Emmanuel Adebayor has risked the wrath of Gunners fans by urging skipper Cesc Fabregas to quit the club for Real Madrid.
    Full story: talkSPORT
    --------------
    Adebuywhore is a twat!

    ReplyDelete
  115. SS11, H2H & all you other Arsenal fans.

    Must say well played last night, was expecting the usual rout from Barca, but fair play to them they fought back & got an unexpected victory, just worry what is going to happen in the return leg though.

    ReplyDelete
  116. KERMIT said...
    just worry what is going to happen in the return leg though.
    ---------------
    If we keep worrying about return leg, we will not be able to perform. As I said earlier, it will be difficult but not impossible. We just have to play our game with high intensity and hope for the best result.

    ReplyDelete
  117. I guess it is all very quiet today in BBC office. They are still shocked and at loss of words at what to write… too embarrassed now and heads hanging in shame self questioning why they doubted this Arsenal team. Mind it, no new blog even for appreciating their local boy Jack Wilshere. I checked 3 blogs and everywhere it’s just Gooner fans who have posted their ecstatic comments waiting for yesterday’s “WUMMERS” to come out of hiding, so that they can now give all the replies. ;)

    ReplyDelete
  118. Xavi, Iniesta, Messi, Fabregas, Villa, Nasri, RvP were on the field last night but compared to the spanish, french, dutch and the argentinian a 19 year old englishman was better.

    How about that?

    put it in yer pipe and smoke it.

    ReplyDelete
  119. Robbo, a word.

    could you please lay off of writing a blog on Wilshire? Or Arsenal for that matter. Please.

    For reference, have a look at your efforts on Fabregas,Nasri, Arsenal etc in past that have condemned your subject to injury and misfortune instantaneously.

    ReplyDelete
  120. Mas'haf, you could also say that the 19 year old englishman has had the benefit of playing with those Spanish, French and Dutch players for a few years.

    ReplyDelete
  121. Well done Gunners, you're keeping the dream of having a Spurs vs Arsenal cup final alive :)

    ReplyDelete
  122. SS11

    I am worried that the expectation of the fans after last night my be a little high, yes I know nothing wrong with going into the game with confidence, but Aresnal need to score early to give them a chance of pulling it off.

    ReplyDelete
  123. Well done Arsenal, get the favourites out so United have half a chance of winning!! If Valencia comes back strong it should be interesting with Nani and Tony on the wings!

    On Barca rolling about like little pussies, its the main thing that irks me about them. They're gaining the recognition of being the best team since the Milan team of the late 80's, early 90's so why dive, exaggerate challenges or lift imaginary cards every chance you get? I don't like their attitude.

    Anyone else think Koscielny was a lucky boy right at the end, he went right into the back of Pedro I think knocking him off balance. If Pedro followed team orders properly he wouldve dropped to the ground and won a penalty, no doubt.

    ReplyDelete
  124. I never saw him in the back of anyone Rod, not illegally anyway.

    ReplyDelete
  125. It was just after Arshavin brushed the ball with his arm. Messi I think cut it back to Pedro who turned his back to Koscielny. It wasnt a tackle or anything he just ran into the back of him. If Pedro had been a bit cuter he could've won a pen I think.

    ReplyDelete
  126. Must have been between when Wishire punched the ball to Fabregas who threw it on to van Persie... I think the ref was a little blind Rod.

    ReplyDelete
  127. mornin' all. Is this "Wilshire" the new Lancashere?

    ReplyDelete
  128. Anyone ever heard an Arsene Wenger interview where he hasn't used the words mentality and belief?

    I know the incident that you're referring to Rod, and it was never a foul. If Pedro had gone down then he should have been booked for diving.

    ReplyDelete
  129. Granted it would've been sickening but unfortunately it is a foul if he falls over, by the letter of the law.

    ReplyDelete
  130. haha Noel, it's true and I often think owen Coyle's post match interview is recorded pre-game. He'll include this every week....They have great quality and depth and that's what you need in the Barclays premier league and since I came here a year ago when we were in the bottom three, the resposnse from the players has been terrific and they're all enjoying themselves and looking forward to coming to work and and I think we deserved the three points today (result is irrelevant).

    ReplyDelete
  131. I don't think its possible for Wenger to start a sentence without saying "I believe..."

    ReplyDelete
  132. that's not fair Rod, sometimes he starts with...."Well (pause), I believe...."

    ReplyDelete
  133. BojanglesOfOz said...

    Must have been between when Wishire punched the ball to Fabregas who threw it on to van Persie... I think the ref was a little blind Rod.
    17 February 2011 11:43

    -----------------------------------

    lol.

    ReplyDelete
  134. You think by now as well someone would've taken Wenger aside and told him he looks like a giant cock wrapped in a sleeping bag when he wears them coats. Theres no way he could could believe it looks good.

    ReplyDelete
  135. Rod,

    Wenger would/could only believe he looks like a cock if he could see it. He obviously did'nt and wont.

    ReplyDelete
  136. I think he should start wearing them glasses again then.

    ReplyDelete
  137. Liverpool former co-owner Tom Hicks cannot sue in US
    --------------------------------------------
    Good lord, are these fools still alive? Some people just dont know when to give up.

    ReplyDelete
  138. Bo, the "het" was supposed to be "her", bloody yuppie iPhone's with their built in (dutch) dictionarys changing all the words.

    There's no offence taken what so ever.

    ReplyDelete
  139. Little Jack was the man last night and I think a special mention also needs to go out to Kos who made some timely interceptions. Cheesy Wotsit had a good game too.
    Barca were breathtaking at times and just before the half time whistle I thought we were in for a hiding snd I was dreading that we wouldn't finish the first 45 with XI men on the field, Song was walking an extreamly fine line and the Barca players were targeting him hoping for a "foul".

    We came out beter in the second half but I still thought Barca were in control, the substitutions changed the game, I cheered when they took David Villa off, and as Wenger replaced Song with Arshavin I remember thinking wow, that's a ballsy move, it's all or nothing here tonight. Luckily it paid off and we got the result that we'd never managed in all our previous encounters; A win against Barca. Hooray \o/\o/

    Now I don't think for a second that this tie is over, I'm not sure what our chances will be in Camp Nou, but at least we've gave ourselves a fighting chance. So for now I'll just savour the moment and bask in the glory of a win against arguably the best team on the planet.

    ReplyDelete
  140. Anyone else think Super Noodles are the most stinking form of ruffage known to man? I've had dog biscuits that taste better!

    ReplyDelete
  141. That picture on the bbc website of van p hugging wenger. There's something that just looks awkward about it. It's almost like he ran all the way over to him and when he got there both of them thought, hang on, er...actually, no.
    Maybe it's because Arsene looks like he hasn't got the strength to hug vp back?
    I think I have too much time on my hands...

    ReplyDelete
  142. Noel said...
    Anyone ever heard an Arsene Wenger interview where he hasn't used the words mentality and belief?

    ----
    Or disipline and spirit?

    ReplyDelete
  143. I've just had a great idea which may save the lives of millions of trees worldwide - make paper towels 10% bigger and your won't need more than one to dry your hands.

    Fuck I'm good hi. Now where can I apply for the Dragon's Den.

    ReplyDelete
  144. Spitfire. Arsenal were lucky and all their players are crap. That Wilshire just Joe Cole without the East End charm.

    Hope that fits the bill.

    ReplyDelete
  145. AnfieldHopeful said...
    Liverpool former co-owner Tom Hicks cannot sue in US
    --------------------------------------------
    Good lord, are these fools still alive? Some people just dont know when to give up.
    ------------------------------

    To be fair the events leading up to the NESV takeover were suspect. It's like you paying your mortgage and the bank going to the guy up the road and saying his mortage is worth this give us the money and we'll let you take his house off him before checking if he can pay it off.

    I didn't have any liking for G&H but they were well swindled by RBS and Broughton

    ReplyDelete
  146. Robbo,

    I tank thee o lord of robblognauts. merci.

    ReplyDelete
  147. and by tank, i meant thank.

    to be fair, wouldnt cost much to tank a smoggie would it? what with the unbelievably low price of beer up narf.

    ReplyDelete
  148. I agree adam, theres not much evidence to show the club is in better health now. Except the 50 million delivery from London.

    ReplyDelete
  149. rod I like your environmentally aware plan to make paper hand towels 10% bigger.

    Personally I think it would make more sense to make hands 10% smaller

    I can't look at Arsene and pat rice without thinking of Mr burns and smithers

    ReplyDelete
  150. hahaha and Arshavin looks like Mo!

    ReplyDelete
  151. is there and Ivana Freebier in the bar?

    ReplyDelete
  152. Bart calls "Inga-bar Beerman's", in Stockholm

    (Bartender) Ja? I shall inquire. Is there a Mr. Myfriendsaregay, first name Olav? Attention, everyone; Olav Myfriendsaregay!

    Patrons laugh smugly

    Wait a minute...if I ever get a hold of you, I will thank you for showing me the futility of human endeavor.

    ReplyDelete
  153. RodTheFierce said...
    I agree adam, theres not much evidence to show the club is in better health now. Except the 50 million delivery from London.
    -----------------------------------------

    er..that and the small part of the clubs debt being paid off and us being a debt-free club able to spend millions to get in some world class players. Apart frm that not much else has changed I guess.

    ReplyDelete
  154. Where were you last season! Rooney was class.

    ReplyDelete
  155. Rooney is an over hyped potato headed twat who needs a good bloody kicking. And he shinned in that goal. It was a fluke. He's vastly over rated. And he's a potato headed twat.

    Oh and evening all.

    ReplyDelete
  156. Rod, the bullshit that you deliver in here has livened up discussion no end... well done mate.

    ReplyDelete
  157. Would I be right in saying you wasn't a big fan of Rooney's Col?

    ReplyDelete
  158. And did I mention that rooney is a potato headed twat?

    ReplyDelete
  159. Can't stand the guy Bo. I didn't like his reaction at the WC when the fans booed and he didn't like it. He did sweet FA for the first few weeks of the season and then had a hissy fit and threatened to leave because of Man U's lack of ambition to bring in quality players. Just as well for him that they didn't bring anyone in or he would've been on the bench. Stupid potato headed twat that he is.

    ReplyDelete
  160. Granny shagging, whore fucking, wife cheating, potato headed twat.

    ReplyDelete
  161. Granny shagging, whore fucking, wife cheating, money grabbing, potato headed twat

    ReplyDelete
  162. Granny shagging, whore fucking, wife cheating, money grabbing, disloyal, potato headed twat

    ReplyDelete
  163. Granny shagging, whore fucking, wife cheating, money grabbing, disloyal, bll shinning, potato headed twat

    ReplyDelete
  164. Granny shagging, whore fucking, wife cheating, money grabbing, disloyal, ball shinning, goal fluking, potato headed twat

    ReplyDelete
  165. Granny shagging, whore fucking, wife cheating, money grabbing, disloyal, ball shinning, goal fluking, over-rated, potato headed twat

    ReplyDelete
  166. Sparta v Liverpool was a bit of a yawnfest.

    ReplyDelete
  167. So I was right about you not being too keen on him then mate.

    ReplyDelete
  168. why don't you tell us how you really feel Colch?

    Yo Bo, least the pool gorra berrer result than baaaarcaloner (and Wigan). Big One is tomorrow night though, up the VALE.

    ReplyDelete
  169. They are showing the Port Vale game over here Trott... if I am up early enough (2 am) I'll have a look.

    ReplyDelete
  170. BojanglesOfOz said...
    So I was right about you not being too keen on him then mate.
    --------------------------------------

    What gave it away Bo? I'm not his biggest fan

    ReplyDelete
  171. no way, the Vale on tele in Oz, that's the big time!

    ReplyDelete
  172. Anyone interested in a FCL (that's Fantasy Cricket League) for the Cricket World Cup?

    It gives me the chance to show I know as little about cricket as I do about football. I've set up a league at........

    http://espncricinfo.fantasyleague.com/Index.aspx

    Pin Code: 16362

    Anyone is welcome to join. Even all you lurkers out there as long as you promise not to beat me. Just create your team and then click on "enter new league". Then put in the pin under "join an existing league" and robert's your mother's brother you're in.

    ReplyDelete
  173. SO you guys will still be able to watch the World Cup and European Championships on free to air TV. Seems FIFA and EUFA lost their appeal that challenged the UK government's right to designate these two competitions as "protected" sporting events.

    ReplyDelete
  174. You've been OK'd. Didn't realise there was already a league set up (possibly by Jacks?) so I've entered that one as well.

    ReplyDelete
  175. Cheers Col... I think it was SS or Jack that set the other one up... I may as well be shit in two of them mate... don't think I can do worse the the ffl anyway.

    ReplyDelete
  176. Are you doing as badly as me in the FFL Bo? I thought only FBH was below me and even though he hasn't looked at his team in months he beat me a couple of weeks ago.

    ReplyDelete
  177. Not doing quite as bad as you Col... but not much better.... put it this way, if I was a racehorse they would have shot me a few weeks back.

    ReplyDelete
  178. We don't do that over here any more Bo. we simply electrocute them in the parade ring.

    ReplyDelete
  179. Ah, very civilised... you have come a long way since I left your fair shores.

    ReplyDelete
  180. I'm fuckin' sick of cricket, sign me up.....suffolk punchers and ramjets? I'm in!

    ReplyDelete
  181. Hey don't knock the name... took me ages to come up with Ramjets.

    ReplyDelete
  182. The cheapest ticket for the Champs League final at Wembley will be 176 Great British Pounds. It's a good thing it won't cost Spurs' fans much in transport to get there.

    ReplyDelete
  183. Colch - why the discrimination against the residents of this great (albeit mickey mouse speaking) nation. Be a lad and approve Trotts and me.

    Whats the PIN for the 2nd league anyone?

    ReplyDelete

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